Well according to the website I just visited, you can change. I definitely have, at first, I was stuck repeating my anxious Mothers behaviours! My Father had previously been unfaithful, leaving my Mother without any trust. She believes and I agree that he cheated on her throughout their marriage.
When I met my dh, I was incredibly jealous, with no justification. I had grown up thinking that men cheated on their partners. Yes some do, but I didn't realise this, in my head he was already a cheater.
Thankfully as we bonded and I realised just how different he was to my Father, we have developed a secure bond. Love, trust, reassurance and patience on my DH's side contributed to that. We have been through a lot together and stood strong hand in hand.
The website I mentioned has this quote
The good news is, it’s never too late to develop a secure attachment. The attachment style you developed as a child based on your relationship with a parent or early caretaker doesn’t have to define your ways of relating to those you love in your adult life. If you come to know your attachment style, you can uncover ways you are defending yourself from getting close and being emotionally connected and work toward forming an “earned secure attachment.”
www.psychalive.org/how-your-attachment-style-impacts-your-relationship/