How long before he said 'I love you?'

[Dollywiththebolly]

Just that really. We're 3 months in but see each other almost every day & the words have already slipped out of my mouth, I couldn't help myself. He makes me feel all fizzy. He hasn't said it back yet but I can tell by his actions how much he likes/loves me. But it got me wondering, how long before your significant other said those words to you?

[Pollyputhtekettleon]

More than 2 yrs! He had never said it to anyone else though so it was a really big deal for him. We were totally smitten from the moment we met. Neither of us are the type to make big declarations or be mushy. I was getting pretty pissed off that he hadn't said it as you can imagine but I knew it was just part of his intense nature.

He's my dh now.

[LaConnerie]

We went out (v casually) for a few months on and off - he was lovely and I knew deep down I was loved up but didn't want to admit it (I had come out of a horrible relationship and was determined never to get involved with anyone again) and kept pushing him away. Eventually he accepted defeat and we stopped seeing each other. I really missed him :(

A few months later I literally bumped smack bang into him as I turned around in a packed bar. I was so happy to see him I forgot myself, gave him a huge hug and told him I'd missed him and I loved him. He said it straight back and we've been together ever since (getting on for 20 years now with 3 DC).

[ladylouanne]

It's so variable, isn't it?

I posted a similar question lately as I've been seeing someone for over 5 months. The words haven't been said properly yet (he may have said it in the heat of the moment some time back but I didn't hear properly!).

OP, I really admire you. I'm bursting to tell him I love him but just don't know if I cope if he didn't say it back.

[missybct]

We don't say it that often either really, we're more of a take the piss out of each other relationship.

[missybct]

Same as Scrowy - it slipped out after we'd sat by a river for 4 hours chatting, listening to music and watching YouTube videos. He instantly flushed red in the face and then told me to ignore it, and then got all nervous. I tried not to hear it (I'm far, far more wary a romantic character than he) but he kept going on about how embarrassed he was .

[Scrowy]

About a week, on our third date. He said it, it slipped out in the heat of the moment and I pretended not to hear . I reminded him recently and he went red and said he knew right from our first date that I was the one.

It was love right from our first date for me too though.

He doesn't say it often as he isn't the type but he shows it in many many small ways which is far more important to me.

[honeybunny14]

3 weeks still together and very much in love he said it first

[bitchingtwitching]

After about 2 weeks. It was unusual circumstances though. We have been together nearly a year now and tell each other about 10 times a day.

[Cocolepew]

I was married at a year!

[niceupthedance]

Two months. I said it after about 3.

[B1rdinthebush]

Two weeks.

We've now been together for three years, have two kids (twins!) and are getting married this summer.

[Flingingmelon]

A year! We were all ready to move in together.

I got really emotional stood outside our local Topps Tiles and whilst crying, said I couldn't live with him if he couldn't tell me he loved me.

He told me he loved me.

In almost twenty years, not including our wedding and written in cards, he's only said it about ten times.

I know he does though, you don't need words to tell someone you love them.

[BearFeet]

4 months. Dh said it first.

[IfNotNowThenWhenever]

Yeah, men have to say it first.
What??!! I don't make the rules!
Ime, most men are really careful about saying the three little words when they don't feel it.
With my boyfriend of a year, he acted like he did love me- kind, considerate, attentive, but never said it. Because he didn't.
I am talking about men 35+ though. The young uns seem to fling the phrase about willy nilly.

[Patterkiller]

DH told me on our first date, he was a bit drunk and don't know if he remembers doing it. I think after that it was about two months in.

Together for twenty years. He still says it too much.

[flanjabelle]

About 4 months. That was 8 years ago, I don't think it was too soon. I just realised how bloody happy he made me, and how I didn't for a second feel like I needed to be anything but me.

[VirginiaWoofs]

And if anyone thinks 4 months is too soon - we lived in flats next each other and subsequently spent time together every day. We were friends for about 6 months beforehand too. So I think we knew each other very well by the time we said it.

[VirginiaWoofs]

I seriously said it to DP at about 4 months. He said it back (seriously) straight away. It was a nice moment - we'd just spent the day with my parents (he was meeting them for the first time)


BUT

DP actually said it by accident at about 2 months in! He didn't realise he'd said it but obviously I did it was in a jokey context: "it's a good job i love you then isn't it!"

He still doesn't believe he said it first!

[TheNaze73]

Read this thread with a lot of interest & there are some lovely stories on here Is the expectation really, that a guy should say it first? I never have and I am intrigued and why that should be in 2016?
Sorry if this constitutes high jacking a thread

[bossbabebot]

After a couple of months my BF ( now DH number three - and he is a keeper) would say 'I like you .... A lot' was like watching Kryton in Red Dwarf saying 'smeg head'.......


Quite soon after that love came into the conversation. But before love was said, we had a 'state of the Union' conversation. I had two children and couldn't have any more - obv if he wanted his own then he was barking up the wrong tree. He said he wasn't bothered about having kids and he felt too old ( forty) to start. I said he would need to move in with me as my two were at high school - he agreed. He then said he couldn't get married in a church .... This was the first time he had spoken about being that involved. And a couple of weeks later he popped the question.

12 years later and we are still mad about each other and funnily enough this marriage has lasted longer than numbers one and two combined!

[Toomuchinfo1]

my (now ex) boyfriend did it in a strange way, about a month in. (we had known each other from when we were kids, so didn't feel too soon)

he was telling me about a conversation between him and his mate, and said 'so yeh, I was telling XXXX that I think I might love you'

think he was nervous and he found it easier to say it that way!

everyone is different - just try to stay relaxed about it, and then it will be extra lovely when he says it :)

[Cocolepew]

About a week.

[gunting]

I think it was about 3 months. He said it in bed before we went to sleep and I thought I'd misheard and didn't want to say it back incase I was wrong

[MagicPotion]

About a year, I think. It slipped out after sex . Happily, he said he felt the same.

I'd been feeling it for a few months, but we were both being quite cautious as had both come out of long term relationships not long before getting together.

15 years later. He is a right slush bucket nowadays and says it multiple times a day

[TurnOffTheTv]

About two weeks. Still madly in love years later!