Problems with adult siblings

[BoxingMum2015]

I'm oldest of three. All in our 50s. Sister 4 years younger (no kids) and brother 6 years younger (3 kids - 2 ex-wives). Have never been close to siblings and I had a traumatic childhood including being sexually assaulted at age 10 and emotionally & physically abused at a convent between ages of 10-12. My siblings did not have either of these experiences. Major falling out with sister two years ago regarding her failure to help with aging mother. Sister launched into a diatribe in a restaurant in front of my daughter (then 18) criticising me for my real & perceived short-comings one of which was that I did not show her the "soft side" which I show my daughter. Apologised to my daughter but not to me. I want nothing more to do with her because she evidently wants something from me that I am unable to provide. Brother lives overseas but on a recent visit, he visited everyone else save me. We have always got on OK and I have been very supportive of his eldest daughter over the years. Frankly, I am disgusted that he has apparently sided with my sister. I want nothing more to do with him. There is so much more but I don't feel like writing War & Peace (although very little peace in this story). Has anyone else experienced problems with siblings in adulthood?

Shodan - you did the right thing. Your brother is definitely a coward and what he did was the typical response of a bully. I wonder whether your mother would support him in this too. Interestingly, I recently told my mother about some really unpleasant abuse and threats which my husband & I received from someone we used to employ in our small business. Her response was "What did YOU do. This sort of thing has never happened to me". It was so laughable that I could not be upset and so typical for her to blame me for someone else's behaviour. Whilst I have no wish to cast myself as a victim, on this occasion I was but like with everything else, she chose to put the blame on me.

*hellsbellsmelons"
Thanks for the flowers. I found the thread you mentioned - it is about whether those with bad childhoods can themselves be good parents. As you say, there were some terrible stories there. However, I do believe that we do not have to repeat the sins of our parents. I made a conscious effort to be a very different type of mother to my daughter. I did not always succeed but I think I certainly did a better job than my own mother because my darling girl seems to be a happy confident person which I definitely was not at her age.