Due to get married next June but the more time ticks on, the less love I'm feeling for him. We clash on a lot of things, we both have stressful jobs and I like to come home from work and relax. He likes to come home from work and start fannying around with DIY, kicks off if the house is untidy, runs around fixing things and tidying things and then moans at me that he's come in from work and had to "run around after everyone" but he chooses to do it!! even when I tell him not to he won't listen. A few months ago he offered to help his mum sell her house and then slagged her off and whinged like mad that he was expected to sort out everyone's lives for them - but he almost insisted on doing it!! It's got to the point where I don't like him doing things for me and the kids because he just uses it as an excuse to moan and whine later on.
He's constantly sarcastic with me. If I say to him something innocent and NORMAL like "oo the bank is looking a bit poorly this month" he'll immediately switch to arsehole mode and start saying "oh - ok well I won't eat this month, will that make you feel better about it?" 
He's such a know it all, I constantly get from him "oh well I've done this/that/the other before so I know how it is." this includes "Ive been married before so I know all about it", "I've been abroad loads of times so I know everything there is to know", "Ive done camping loads of times so I'm the one that will get everyone through it". - he's done EVERYTHING before so he dismisses everyone elses experiences in favour of him being the leader. Example of this is that we're going to a festival this week, it's his 6th time (and yeah, I've heard that statement many, many times now), my second time and our friends - it's their 1st time. Well DP seems to think that everyone will be useless and die without his help. He keeps trying to take over everything, keeps commenting to me that our friends will be fucked when they get their as they're so green - he's even sat there with a smug face saying "oh I'm going to have a right game looking after 3 green people all week!" - nobody wants fucking "Looking after", we're adults! he's so patronizing.
He never shows any enthusiasm for ANYHING unless it's something HE wanted to do. Our upcoming holiday to the other side of the world for instance in 6 weeks - he's barely spoken about it. So frustrating. He never speaks about our supposed wedding next year. In fact, he wanted to cancel it and save the money so we could do a festival instead (nice priorities there). I compromised and said we'd do the wedding and go to the festival as our honeymoon. He agreed yet a couple of weeks later has invited his son and girlfriend to the festival with us as if it's just a normal jolly away camping. I was like "hey, that's supposed to be our honeymoon! did you forget??" and he replied "oh I know but they won't camp with us, we'll just be taking them down in car". It's like the whole thing is NOTHING to him.
I used to love him so much but lately I just can't be arsed with him. I can't be arsed with his lack of enthusiasm, I can't be arsed with his sarcasm, I can't be arsed with his constant pessimism - I daydream about being engaged to a man who actually, genuinely wanted me and wanted to make me happy.
I think I'm marrying for financial security alone. I've denied it to myself for ages but when I truely think about it, I don't want this for the rest of my life :-( How do you know when you no longer love someone??
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Don't think I love fiance anymore. Sham marriage looming.
HeadlessAndBowless · 24/06/2014 13:15
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Eleanor's spreadsheet must unravel to the size of the Bayeaux Tapestry. How in God's name so you remember all this stuff? 
Hello. Woss gahn on?
AF are you alluding to the same thing as Eleanor?
I must admit I was wondering why the OP hadn't come back.
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oh you must marry him
what else will you do with your time if you can't moan about him on here?
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