Going round and round in circles about house move

[Monkeytrousers04]

Our house has been on the market since August. The plan at the time was to sell MiL’s house as well and all move in together. It was really exciting and we had a nice healthy budget and after viewing quite a few houses we found one that ticked all the boxes… it was a dream home.

BUT MiL backed out of the plan on the grounds that she didn’t want to leave her home of 46 years. To be honest DP and I had wondered if this might happen and had tried not to get our hopes up too much but it was very hard. We kept asking asking her if she really wanted to go through with it and her staple response was, “it’s just a house, it doesn’t matter where I live as long as I’m with you” so we kept going with the plan until she finally admitted it would be too hard.

So, the dream house sold. MiL’s house never even made it to market and our house is still for sale. It’s reached the point where we need to reduce the asking price if we still want to sell but I don’t know if we do… We only put it on the market due to the MiL wanting to move in with us but obviously we’ve seen a few houses now and have had a taste of what we could get for our money and it’s so hard knowing what’s out there and what a difference it could make if we were to move…

One the one hand, we could do with more room. We are a family of five in a three bed house, and both DP and I work from home. We have a little nook on the landing where we have a desk to work at and another desk in our bedroom - but it’s not ideal… we also live on the outskirts of our village so have to drive the kids to school and their various after school clubs. It’d be nice to live within walking distance.

Our house also needs some TLC - so if we stay we need to spend some money on it. Probably in the region of £50-60k to buy us a few more years of living here… there are a few things we could do to add value but not much as we’ve already converted the cellar and the attic and we can’t extend out the back due to issues with maintaining a right of way…

The flip side is, we love where we live, our neighbours are really special - we have garden parties in the summer, there’s a little group of kids who have all grown up together. In the summer the kids play between all the gardens and have paddling pool parties… from speaking to a few people this seems quite rare and it would be hard to say goodbye to. It’s quiet and secluded with woodland out the back and our house is full of character - beams, wood floors, original range in the kitchen. Our kids are happy, except for the occasional moan about not having their own rooms. And our eldest DD would like to start walking to school and back when she starts year 6 in Sept (which is not safe to do where we are now due to lack of pavements down the hill to the village and people driving like idiots most of the time).

To buy a minimum 4 bed house in the village costs at least £450-550k, but if you want a decent garden, off-street parking and possibly a fifth bedroom/ office it creeps up to around £600-650k. There is currently detached 4 bed for sale in the heart of the village priced at £725!

Despite their large price tags, houses of this size sell very quickly here as there aren’t many of them. To be in with a shot you need to be “proceedable”… with some agents not letting you view houses without an offer on your own.

There is one house currently on the market that would tick all but one of our boxes (it’s not in the village so still a drive to school/ clubs, etc.) and it’s just about within our budget - we’d have to make an offer 4-5% below the asking price.

So what to do?! I just don’t know… We could reduce our asking price and try for the one we like. Or we could take ours off the market and stay put a bit longer - the problem being that if a really good one came up in the village we’d be behind the curve and would most likely miss out on it.

I’m just so sick of having this conversation in my head over and over again. DP is the most indecisive human that has ever existed and typically says “mmm, it’s tricky” and walks off when I try and discuss it with him.

Any thoughts would be most welcome. And thanks for reading if you made it this far…

[Ishouldbeoutside]

Your neighbourhood sounds absolutely idyllic. I agree with the PP who said wait a year and then review.

[bumbledeedum]

Could you add a garden office/room for extra space?

[bumbledeedum]

I wouldn't move. It really doesn't sound like the figures add up to gain much by moving, eg you're not going to gain space & proximity to school etc only one or the other which seems like a lot of compromise to lose a lot of positives of your current house.

[Blibbleflibble]

I would give my left tit for nice neighbours, we're moving because of our shitty ones. Is there any way to extend your current house to get the space you need or go into the loft? Xx

Either which way I would NOT move in the current market if I didn't have to especially if you're upsizing. I'm not sure if I can cope living with my neighbours any longer, sure I'd like more space anyway but if my joining semi detatched neighbour wasn't a shitbag I'd sit on my hands at least another year if not two.

[flapjackfairy]

I wouldn't move as your house and set up.sounds fantastic. A supportive community of neighbours is worth its weight in gold.
And the house sounds lovely as well.

[Franceen]

I agree with Parietal: The desire for something better, may not be better and may not be rational. By having houses in your head you put a time frame on a desire to move.
If you set a 12-month timeframe - so this means you get next Christmas out of the way and ease into the new 2024... I believe Sunak will get the country into a better state. This could be an advantage.
He will have one or two Budgets and will want to inject a boost into the economy.

[parietal]

take your house of the market. stay put. do nothing for 1 year and then revisit the issue in a year and see where you stand.