Strange adults near school - worrying unnecessarily?

[Amy68]

This is my first post here but I have read posts here before. I apologise for a rather unusual topic, but I thought it worth asking.

Recently my 10 year old DD has told me she has seen a man walking near her school as she and her friends have been walking home, and he has been wearing a skirt. Other parents have since confirmed similar stories from their children, and some are quite concerned at primary age children seeing this. Even more concerning, they think it is the same skirt that DD and many girls themselves wear to school, so could he be trying to mimic their uniform? DD wears the M&S box pleat school skirt, which is very distinctive if anyone is familiar with it (3 pleats front and back, straight either side).

Personally I have no problem with crossdressing men, but near a school coming out, and similar to the girls' uniforms, I understand it could cause concern. Am I worrying unnecessarily in the hype of paedophilia etc. Should I inform the school, phone the police, or just ignore it and accept it is up to him what he wears, within limits of decency of course. Is there a precedent for this?

Any ideas

Amy

[Flightattendant]

Why do you think that Seeker? I don't think the police are any more wanting to waste their time on unnecessary reports than you or I would be...but of course there may be some who would want to harass someone innocent, so I take your point.

I've not mentioned paedophilia at all, was that someone else? what has that got to do with cross dressing?

[Flightattendant]

and does anyone know why SGB's post got deleted? Just for the record I didn't report it, can't even remember what it said.

[SolidGoldBangers]

Look, suggesting that morons with overactive imaginations call the police every time they see something unusual is a really bad idea. Not only does it potentially criminalise perfectly harmless individuals who just happen not to be particularly conformist, but it is an immense waste of police time and resources. Just imagine: 'Waaah, police! I saw a black person near the school! This is not a multicultural area, s/he must be a burglar!'

[Flightattendant]

I'm sure they get a lot like that SGB, hopefully they don't act on those either.
Rather waste a little police time and OP be at ease that she's done something, however unnecessary it might be, than have a worried lynch mob of parents trying to take matters into their own hands once a few of the more ignorant people get upset about it.

iyswim

not saying the OP is ignorant but some of the parents might be.

I hate the word 'morons', find it really offensive btw

[SolidGoldBangers]

FA: erm, is 'morons' a term that's upsetting to people with kids with SN, like 'retard'? I honestly thought it was just a term for 'stupid people' with no anti-SN prejudice.

(I did once say 'retard' on MN to mean 'stupid unpleasant person' and got a kicking which I admit was deserved )

[Flightattendant]

Hey SG don't worry about it. Yes it's another of those 'outdated classification scheme now considered offensive' if you look it up...it described someone with a certain childlike mental age.

Although similar words, such as imbecile, cretin and even idiot are also part of that...in fact I can't think of a decent word it would be inoffensive to use! I have often used 'idiot' in a context of 'stupid person' without realising it may cause offence...I think it is less commonly offensive though than the others.

I need a new word too

[SolidGoldBangers]

Let's stick to 'fuckwit'

[Flightattendant]

OK

[saintmaybe]

I'm more about the op's main objection to femalefirst being that it's a 'deadzone'.

I think that's the least of the problems there

[saintmaybe]

And agree, to be anxious about someone crossdressing near a school is offensive nonsense. But as most of the talkboard on ff is blatantly fantasy I don't even know whether to take this op seriously.

[doingthelambethwalk]

Well cross-dressing in itself is not a problem but adults hanging round schools who are not parents or carers or teachers etc. are of interest to the police actually.

It is not harmful to tell the police your concerns, they will know how to monitor the situation if necessary.

[doingthelambethwalk]

PS although paedophilia is in the news etc a lot these days I think the police have more on their hands with school burglaries.

[GuyFawkesIsMyLoveSlave]

"numpty" is good, and I don't think has a pseudo-medical history. Or "muppet".

[FlyMeToDunoon]

I regularly passed a cross dresser near DD's school, at any old times of the day and didn't think much about it, apart from what apalling taste in clothes he had.
Than someone told me that trans-sexuals often stayed in town for a while as they had to live as women for a specified time before their ops and there was a clinic nearby.

[SolidGoldBangers]

DLTW: 'Hanging around' is incredibly subjective, though. A person can be waiting (fairly regularly) to be picked up by a friend or workmate, or pass the school on the way to/from work or the shops or the pub - schools are not, generally, on islands or miles from any other building.
Lurking next to the playground fence with his cock out would obviously be a cause for concern, but just passing by is not, however odd a person looks.

[Flightattendant]

When I was outside school this morning in the car, there was a bloke standing in the open back doorway of a restaurant that backs onto the bit where everyone walks by with their kids.

I was driving slowly and had to look 3 times to make sure I wasn't seeing things - one of his hands held a cigarette, the other was RIGHT DOWN HIS PANTS

He was standing there staring at me, and having a w*nk. It was revolting.

I don't for a minute think he was doing it in relation to the kids, so didn't think it worth reporting to anyone...he may not even have seen me looking...(trying not to look actually) but one thing's for sure - I'm never buying anything from that particular Subway again. EVER.

[Flightattendant]

He was dressed as chef btw. Can you imagine.

[pagwatch]

eeeeuuuuwwwwww !

[Amy68]

Eeeek. Caused a slight storm there. I now wish I hadn't gone on femalefirst as I can see what I may be associated with.

I have actually spoke to a neighbour who happens to be a policeman about this. He said they couldn't do anything in this case unless we could prove this man is causing fear and alarm, or there is a sexual intent towards children. DD has not felt either of those and hasn't seen him since I first wrote here.

Doing some googling around, there may be a precedent for this.

www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2009517.ece

This is nowhere near us though.