3 year old august born twins starting school in September

[busbybabe1]

Hi. Having been quite blasé I am now terrified of my two month prem twins starting school this September. Delay isn't an option, that ship has sailed, so now i need to focus on getting them ready.

The positives, they recognise their own names, letters and numbers. Are starting to count properly and sequentially count to 20. Have started trying to write. They never stop talking. Love books and stories. Are pretty much potty trained except at night. Getting a lot better at sharing and taking turns.

The negatives. They can't dress themselves at all, and have the attention spans of goldfish. One goes to Sunday school and seems behind his peers in terms of sitting down listening and following instructions, and he is my more 'forward' one ifykwim.

Any thoughts? I so want school to be a positive experience for them from day one. They go to a childminders and nursery, both seem pretty happy with them.

[insancerre]

ceeveebee
you are welcome :)
just to put your minds at rest, most good preschools will have identified the summer bors and be working extra hard at making sure they are school ready
summer borns are any child born between 1st april and 31st august
ive just delivered training to my team on meeting the needs of vulnerable children and we have already identified those summer borns who will be going to school in sep 2017
by vulnerable, we just mean those at risk of not meeting the early learning goals at the end of reception, not vulnerable in a child protection sense

[Santaschiefelf]

Legally I'm pretty certain you can start summerborns in January or April & they are entitled to do part time for as long as you wish until they reach CSA. School & LEA may tell you otherwise but research it carefully & stand your ground as I'm pretty certain these are your decisions to make whereas delaying a whole year is still bit of a grey area.

[busbybabe1]

No negativity here santaschiefelf, you know what's right for your little one. I just gut feel that for mine another year is too late, they will be climbing the walls. Maybe a January start might be better but don't think they do that in my lea (which notoriously plays serious hard ball), and then I worry about them settling once others are already there. I have a parents evening at nursery on Thursday. Let's see what they say. Noises to date have been pretty positive.

[Santaschiefelf]

My ds will be 4 at the end of July ( but was due in October). He stills wears nappies (NOTHING has worked so far with regards to changing this), recognises no colours, shapes or numbers, can count to 10 but can't count objects, can take off coat & shoes but can't put anything back on. He is a sociable child & has happily attended 3 days at nursery for the past 18 months however I feel he is so much more like a younger child & much prefers to play with the younger ones. Watching him try to interact with the kids in his 'correct year group' is just painful. We have decided it's not in his best interests to go to school this year therefore he will have an extra year at nursery to mature regardless of the outcome of our application to the LEA.

I know this is not a popular opinion on MN & I await the negativity! However the reason I posted was to say to Busby that your twins sound great but don't give up hope if you do want to delay them/keep your options open. Are you on the Facebook group? There is a lady who regularly posts on there who works for TAMBA & has helped many sets of twins to delay school start. In fact I think she said recently that all the sets of twins that she has worked with have successfully delayed.

[Bumpsadaisie]

Just to say everyone that they grow up a LOT between 3 and 4. September is a long time away, in child development terms!

[BadDoGooder]

Thank you so much for starting this thread OP!
DS is a May baby, so not youngest, but I was worrying (secretly) that he might not be ready for school in Sept. He seems so young still!
But hearing where everyone else's 3 year old is, emotionally, physically and in terms of education, has really put my mind at rest.
He can do colours, shapes, counting and is currently obsessed with learning how to tell the time! He is 100% toilet trained, can dress himself a little and the attention span thing I think I will start work on!
Phew...mind at ease!

[ceeveebee]

insancerre Thank you for that very useful list

Busbybabe My twins are 4yo, November born, and although DD is more mature, DS doesn't sound dissimilar in terms of development - he has only just started to go to the toilet independently and can't dress himself (can undress though and does frequently in the wrong places) and was kicked out of swimming classes after only one lesson for failure to follow instructions. Also has a very restricted diet so god knows what he will eat at school. A lot can change in 9 months (so I keep telling myself...)

[namechangedtoday15]

Hi, my twins were not August born (they were April) but they were 27 weekers (due at the end of July) so still a worry.

I agree with previous posts in that you’ll be gobsmacked at the range of emotional maturity of the children – the oldest girl (born 1st September) in my twins’ year clung to her mother’s legs at drop off until Christmas. It depends on such a lot of factors – whether they’ve been to nursery, whether they’re confident / sociable children and whether they’re positive about it. I think that’s as much about your approach to it as it is theirs. If you promote how great it’ll be, how exciting, but reassuring them that you’ll be there etc, I’m sure they’ll be fine. I agree that it is definitely about emotional development rather than academic development.

I’d suggest walking to school if you can, so you can hold their hands on the way and chat (without having to concentrate on driving), if you work, consider changing your hours / taking time off for a couple of weeks so you’re there for every drop off and collection – not so they’re reassured, but so you make friends with the other mums and see the children. Arrange a couple of play dates if you can in the run up to starting school (we had a few settling in sessions where the mums all swapped contact details).

And keep everything else – weekends and after school for the first couple of months – low key. They will be shattered. My twins were used to doing 3 fairly long days at nursery (8-5.30pm) but they were more tired by the 9-3 school day.

They’re now in Year 6 and my stress is about them going to secondary school this September !

[bemybebe]

Sorry , on the phone and cannot type easily... I hope you can understand what I am writing here

[bemybebe]

Are you in England, op? There are options for your children 1. to enter a year school early - just after the twins 4th birthday, 2. to wait until compulsory school age, which is the term after their 5th birthday, 3. To go part time until their csa and 4. To start later in the academic year , but not later then the summer term before they turn csa or the school won't hold the place. It really is your choice although some options, namely 2 currently require admission authority approval. There is a super helpful Facebook group called flexible school admissions for summer born children where you can get a lot of useful info.

[MrBennOfFestiveRoad]

School readiness depends a lot on the individual child too, my late-summer born DS1 was much more ready than my winter-born DS2. DS1 was much further ahead academically and behaviourally at the same point in reception that DS2 is at now, I don't think DS2 is any less bright, he just has a very different personality.

[WhenTheDragonsCame]

My DD2 and DD3 are both August born and are doing OK. DD2 is slightly behind where they would expect her to be but has caught up a lot in the last year or so. DD3 is doing really well and none of her teachers have ever shown any concern.

Academically they were both pretty similar to your DC. Could read their name, count and recognise some numbers, knew most colours and could recognise some shapes.

They could dress themselves though and take themselves off to the toilet when they needed to go. That should be fairly easy to practice.

By the way 5 year old DD3 is in year 1 and still not anywhere near being dry and night and it has never caused a problem.

[insancerre]

I manage a preschool and this is what we work in conjunction with the reception teacher re school readiness
Being able to recognise their name written down
Being able to take off their coat and hang it up and being able to find their coat, it it on and zip it up
Being able to go to the toilet by themselves, as in recognising when they need to go, wiping bottoms and washing hands
Being able to get undressed and dressed again for PE
Being able to choose activities
Being able to ask for help, to share and take turns
Being able to make friends and talk to other children
Being able to hold a pencil in the correct grip
Being able to sit still, listen, concentrate and not interrupt for a short period of time
Being aware or rhyme and alliteration
Being able to follow direction
Not having emotional meltdowns
Being able to say goodbye to whoever drops them off
School readiness is more about being emotionally ready than academically ready

[busbybabe1]

It's not that I have taught them letters and numbers really, they just seem keen to pick it up. This is one of the reasons I want them to go to school.

Agree need to focus on them looking after themselves. Forgot about poo wiping - yes that needs sorting. Blegh.

Where I live deferrals are rarely granted and if so often end up in year one. It's all being tested with the new summer born guidance with a few trailblazers - all of whom have exceptional cases (far more so than mine). I definitely didn't want them to go straight into year one, so here we are...

[busbybabe1]

Thank you so much all. You are really setting my mind at rest. 'Playing school' sounds a great idea, I will try it.

[AndNowItsSeven]

Why can't you defer them it's not to late.

[IoraRua]

I wouldn't worry about them knowing letters and numbers.
They need skills like zipping up coats and putting on shoes, taking themselves to the toilet and wiping/washing hands, dressing and undressing. Feeding themselves, sitting and listening to a story, listening to instruction. The academic stuff doesn't matter too much.

[coughingbean]

This thread has helped me quite a bit as I was worried about my DD born 19/8
Thanks for the reassurance!

[slebmum1]

My 31 weeker twins are in reception now, and turned four on August first.

I didn't want to delay them, so they started at just turned 4. They have loved it and are thriving but the tiredness really has been a struggle. They went full time from the beginning and had only done half days in nursery before.

We had to work quite hard on getting bum wiping sorted after a poo (sorry!), but the difference between now and September will be substantial with things like getting dressed.

[Sometimesithinkimbonkers]

My DS was norm 21/8 and he's doing really well at school. Socially it has sometimes been difficult but his classes are now mixed age so seem to have someone on his level!

[Eastpoint]

I saw a friend on Friday, her girls were due in October, born in August. They are yr 11 and both got 10 A*s in their mocks. First few years were tough socially & they were still behind where you'd expect at 10/11 academically but they are now catching up & I expect either one or both will go on to great things.

[melonribena]

They sound very similar if not slightly beyond my ds who will be 4 at the end of July. They will be supported the the class and I'm sure there will be many children not as advanced as that!

I teach year 1 and some of my class couldn't do what you describe!

[PotteringAlong]

You've got another 9 months development too remember; they're not starting tomorrow.

[AChickenCalledKorma]

I have two summer born children. Sometimes it's an issue - sometimes it really isn't. From what you've said, they sound like they are going to be pretty ready.

The only thing that jumps out from your post is your comment about night time potty training. Really don't worry about that as an aspect of "school readiness". There are plenty of children who aren't dry at night until well after starting school (my daughter was in year 4 and still perfectly "normal" according to the school nurse, when we eventually asked for a bit of support!)

The other thing I would say is try and guard against your children hearing too many "oh, but they're so little!" comments from well-meaning adults. DD1 had been at school a few weeks before we realised that she thought all the other kids were much older than her ... because so many people had commented that she seemed very young to be going to school. She's also small, so it was a natural comment to make. She settled in much faster once she realised practically everyone else was four as well!

[m0therofdragons]

We're a year ahead op. My prem twins were 4 on 30th August and started school in sept. They're doing fine. Not top of the class but not obviously the youngest either. The only negative has been that they get very tired so our weekends tend to be fairly chilled out and they go to bed at 7pm but usually by 6.30pm twice a week. This Friday they were in bed at 6pm! There's lots of time between now and sept and I think yours are ahead of mine a year ago re numbers. Definitely have a go at getting them to dress themselves and do their own coats and shoes, otherwise I would relax.