Send your child to school where you teach?

[linzimummy]

I'm currently applying for primary school for my daughter. I had viewed all the local schools and picked 4 but I've just found out I can send her to the school where I teach ( have taught there for the last 10 years) and I'm unsure about whether to go down this option or not. It's only a 10-15 minute drive so it's not far but we would be out of the 0.3mile catchment area otherwise.

I'm not sure whether I'm just being selfish thinking that it's perfect for school runs/childcare and it means I get to see her (& then her little brother too) participating in assemblies etc. Although it's not necessarily an outstanding school in ofsted terms, I love it and the pastoral care is brilliant.

I worry that it's not in her best interests because she doesn't get that freedom of being away from me (although I would never actually teach her) and she won't make friends in the local area. I'm also unsure how socialising with her friends out of school will work when I'm a teacher e.g her birthday parties.

Any opinions or experience of this most welcome!! Thank you

[linzimummy]

Well, application is in! And my school is first choice... I'm so excited about it now

[twolittleboysonetiredmum]

Glad you've finally settled on one linzimummy, it's a relief to not think about it isn't it! I did my ds application last week and have put my school first. The pros definitely outweigh the cons. He's very excited about it too :)

[KeepSmiling83]

My DD started in reception in the school I teach at in September. I'm currently on maternity leave so can't talk too much about it yet but in terms of her transition to primary school it went very smoothly as she had spent so much time there when she was younger. She was familiar with her classroom and most of the teaching staff and has settled in really well.

[JasperDamerel]

I think it depends on the culture of the school. At the primary school my kids go to, several teachers have their children at the school, and many of the TAs and office staff are also parents of pupils, so it's pretty normal for a child to have a parent on staff. The school has very high levels of staff retention - most of the teachers have been their since they were NQTs (and many of those did student placements at the school) so they've generally had experience of teaching the children of a colleague before sending their own children to the school.

[Alwaysfrank]

I was in this situation as a child at infants and I'm not sure I would recommend it. I remember feeling special and perhaps treated differently by some staff members. I avoided being in my mum's class but went into my Godfather's wife's class instead as they taught the same year group. I was sent to a more local school for juniors and that was an adjustment.

I can see that it must be logistically very tempting but I wouldn't do it myself.

[linzimummy]

Thank you everyone. Just thought I'd update this to say that I've decided to send her (& then her brother) to the school where I work.

My only concern is that she won't get the same social network i.e after school play dates and birthday parties with her school mates (the nature of the school I work at means most families don't do birthday parties). But she has lots of friends anyway and I love the fact that we can go to and from school together.

Thank you for all the posts.

[Keeptrudging]

DD had after school club twice a week. She sat in my classroom before school/went out in the playground if other children were there. We had a quicker exit twice a week due to her activities and she often went to play at her friends' too.

I put her excellent study/organisational skills down to her learning from a young age to come in and do homework straight after school while I was working.

[SuffolkNWhat]

Out of interest - those who do teach in the same school as their kids - do you have a childminder/clubs every night or are they sat in your classroom after school?

DD does 3 days with the CM, before school club 2 days and after school club 1 day and the last day (Fri) we go home about 20 minutes after the end of school and I work at home until time to pick up DD2 from nursery. It works nicely for us as I have meeting days covered etc.

[Pranmasghost]

My doc both went to the secondary school where I taught. It wasn't a problem for any of us though they avoided calling me anything in school and I only briefly had one of them in my class.
I'd recommend it. My dd plans to send her boys to the secondary school where she teaches so it obviously didn't bother her too much.

[cariadlet]

My dd is now in year 8, but she used to go to the primary school where I teach and I'm so glad. It worked out well for both of us.

She was used to coming into school in the holidays from the time she was a baby - the place was almost like a 2nd home to her. She was familiar with the building and lots of the staff. It certainly made starting school easy for her once she joined officially.

I felt that her nursery was a closed world to me (grandparents used to do the drop off and pick off, because I was at work). But once she started school I felt more involved.

There was so many little practical things that were easier eg keeping track of dress up days etc, if dd suddenly realise that she needed money for something or had lost her lunch ticket then I could sort her out, if she was a little under the weather but hadn't actually been sick the class teacher could let me know and I could pop and see her at break time etc etc.

I managed to see her Reception Nativity, special assemblies and all her sports days (or at least part of each one). I wouldn't have seen any if she had gone to a different school.

dd used to come into my classroom before school (it helped that I taught either Foundation or Year 1 so there were always things for her to play with). She hung around the classroom after school if I was just marking etc, but went to after-school club a couple of days when I had a staff meeting or planning meeting. I tried to leave school earlier than I do now, and took work home to do once she'd gone to bed.

dd never had a problem with being treated differently by teachers or by other children. We've had friends come for playdates, parties and sleepovers and it's fine. They've learned to call me by my first name at home and my "teacher name" at school.

Now that dd is at secondary school, she often has INSETs on different days to me. She loves to come back to her old school and be my TA for the day.

[Witchend]

I wouldn't. I'll give an example of a conversation I overheard about a year 3 child whose parent is a teacher at the school.

He was running back from rugby after school, and overtook me and another parent and their child.
The conversation between this parent and child went like this:
Parent: Why's he got rugby boots on? Weren't you told that you couldn't wear rugby boots?
Child: No we can. Lots of people do.
Parent: it's just not fair, why shouldn't you wear them if he does?
Child: I can if I bring them. X, Y, Z have theirs too.
Parent: Well it's just not fair it's one rule for Mr A's children and another rule for everyone else. Really disgraceful!


About half the children do wear football boots, the initial letter said we could choose to or not, so it really was her totally set up to want to say that.

[Autumnsky]

I think it should be fine to be in the same school. As DS2 has a friend whose mum is a teacher in the school but not in his son's class. I don't think I feel differently when we meet in the park, as she is not my DS's teacher.

[linzimummy]

Thank you for all the messages. All very useful to help us make our decision.

[mamadoc]

I was taught by my dad at secondary and it was never a problem.
My mum was also a teacher at my school but she joined later and never taught me.
I even called him dad because I couldn't manage to call him anything else.
He was a very popular teacher so it was a positive rather than a negative for my street cred to be his daughter. I don't recall ever getting any grief over it. He didn't really have a different persona at school than at home. He was just himself wherever we were. He told me off in class pretty much the same way he would tell me off at home. He directed me (and my siblings) in plays and coached me in sports teams too and school was just a normal part of our family life to me.
It was a small rural school so all the teachers kids went there (no other choice for many miles) so I did not feel unusual. I felt sorry for the DC whose parents were less popular as they sometimes did have a rough ride.
The one very strict rule my parents had was NO work gossip to be overheard by their DC. I reckon they must have found it hard at times both working there but they never, ever talked about staff, parents or other children within our earshot.
I am pretty sure they had a rule not to interfere behind the scenes either. Certainly they were robust in backing up their colleagues and school rules against any whining from us.

[Keeptrudging]

DD used to play in my room while I got set up in the morning/did marking etc after school. I was early years so lots to play with/read. She also did her homework. I put her to after school club twice a week so I could work late. It worked for us, but she was/is exceptionally well-behaved/able to amuse herself!

[MidniteScribbler]

Out of interest - those who do teach in the same school as their kids - do you have a childminder/clubs every night or are they sat in your classroom after school?

I'm going to send DS to after school care two afternoons per week (my meeting days). The other days I pretty much leave straight after school as I prefer to work from home in the evenings anyway. We can use our after school care casually though, so if I need an extra day because of parent-teacher meetings, etc, I can always send him and just pay for the extra day.

[hels71]

I work in the school my DD is at (doing PPA cover and supply). She is fine with the difference between Mummy and Mrshels even when I teach her.
Thankfully she is a well behaved child(Apart from chatting in the toilets!!!) so that problem does not arise.
We have no issues with parties/friends etc as her friends all have sensible parents who can also separate school and home.

the main "problems" we have are:
Before I started working she regularly got certificates etc for doing well...this is noticeably less since I started working there (maybe this is co-incidence?)
When I have taught her class, if I have had to tell off certain children they them pick on her the next day. She has not made this connection thankfully, but I have now told the school I will only do supply in her class if they can get no-one else.

[Bogburglar99]

My good friend has her child in the primary school where she teaches and so do a number of other teachers and TAs. Undoubtedly pros and cons but it seems to work well for those who have chosen it.

Advantages I can see for my friend:
Small DC doesn't have to spend long hours in wrap round childcare in another setting
She gets to see so much more of her child's school life than she otherwise would - assemblies, nativities, just the odd passing hug/wave/chat.
She has complete faith in the school where her DC is (obviously this depends what you think of where you work but I think for her our school was always going to be the best choice and she wouldn't have wanted anything less for DC)
She has good relationships and trusts the staff who are teaching he DC (again, works because our school has v good staff room relationships ... to date ...)
Vastly easier logistically.

Major disadvantage I would say is that it's harder for her to be as easy in making friendships with parents in her DCs class as she would like. Not by any means impossible, but certainly harder. Doesn't seem to impact on DC though who is a lovely kid with a wide social circle.

I really don't think there is a right answer. I also have friends who teach who are very happy with their kids elsewhere, and another one who has an SLT post and moved her kids to her new school - very happy with it, but would never have had them in the previous one which was v different.

I have a very tricky kid and it is hard enough at times being a governor never mind a teacher. I think if DC was liable to be tricky to handle in any way I would think hard before proceeding.

Good luck whatever you decide.

[twolittleboysonetiredmum]

Really interesting perspectives on here. I think there's going to be pros and cons to either choice really linzi. We're fairly sure we'll be putting our chn in my school and will review our choice on the transition from infant to junior and possibly move them then. Another reason I'm keen on the idea is that I've a summer born boy who's quite immature. I'll feel better about his teeny tiny self starting at school at just 4 if he's in school with me. I don't plan on being on top of him and plan to keep the mum/teacher divide as clear as is possible. I'm year 6 so unlikely to have much contact with my chn for years on a day to day basis. But equally if he's sad at 3:30 I can go give him a quick cuddle and reassurance then see him again at 5:30 when I collect him. I'll see more of his assemblies etc than if I sent him elsewhere. And hear the anecdotal side of life from his teachers. Appreciate that's where the downside is too, especially if they're hard chn to work with. Again, pros and cons I think.

[mrz]

Having said that my colleague obviously finds it difficult to stop being a mum and switch to teacher in school.

[mrz]

I'm not sure colleagues will say if they feel uncomfortable and I've got to be honest I didn't see it as a problem until the child was in my class. Previous teachers had said how difficult they found it but I (wrongly) believed it wouldn't be an issue. It's actually marred a 15 year working relationship.

[holmessweetholmes]

I teach (MFL, only 1 hour a week) at my dc's primary and actually teach both my dc. Dh is deputy head at the local secondary, where both our dc will go to school. It doesn't bother us or them at all so far, but I suppose it might cramp their style a bit when they are teenagers. It must be pretty common in rural areas, as there are fewer schools to choose from.

[linzimummy]

Thank you everyone. I'm swaying more to the decision that it may be a bad idea! I love my job and would never want any conflict caused by blurring my mummy/parent/teacher roles. I will speak to colleagues though to see how they'd feel about having my children in school.

Out of interest - those who do teach in the same school as their kids - do you have a childminder/clubs every night or are they sat in your classroom after school?

[musicinspring1]

I teach in our catchment (p/t) and I chose not to send dd there even though our ofsted is better than the alternative. Reasons being..... I went to school and one of my best friends had his mum as a teacher there. The other children picked on him mercilessly, all low level snidey stuff and he refused to tell anyone about it. I wish I could turn back time and speak out but his mum still thinks it was a fab experience all round.
Secondly, having taught for a long time I appreciate that parents can be moany and that I too, may want a moan. I just felt that it would better to separate work in this regard. I've already had a few niggles where I've gone in to see the teacher for clarification. I may have felt too embarrassed to do this with a colleague and just silently seethed!!!
Lastly, I wanted dds friends to want to come over for play dates with none of the 'oooh it's Mrsx' history. And I wanted to make proper friends with other parents and not worry about what I was saying all the time!!
It helped that I loved the alternative school when I looked around, so it wasn't my school or something horrid.
If people ask why dd isn't at my school (and they do) I just honestly say that I wanted to keep work and home separate and that's fine.
I can see advantages in having dc at your own school and my friend's experiences may have coloured my judgement, but I've been very happy with my decision.
As a side note, my friend works as a ta at her dcs school and she can't go to everything her child is in if the children she is supporting aren't also involved.