Three school runs and so so fed up : ((

[Timetogetserious]

I'm so fed up tonight. I have five children. Three are at different schools all over town. I am managing in the morning because one of the schools lets me use the school grounds to park and drop off. It's hard work but it works.

But the evening is a disaster. First I have to drive to the infants. Put baby in sling and walk toddler 5 minutes to the school. Then 5 minutes back to the car. Then all back in and off to second school. Park up, baby back in sling, wake up toddler who has now fallen asleep and has a tantrum. Walk to second school for second child. Back to the car with screaming toddler and often crying baby by now. All back in car. Drive 5 minutes home and drop off eldest because she can't fit in the car. Back in and drive 10 minutes to pick up eldest at third school. By this time youngest children are usually grumpy. The reason I am so fed up is that the school have been lovely to let me park in the grounds in the morning. It helps enormously as I don't have to get the little ones out of the car. But tonight with the two youngest fast asleep I buzzed and asked if I could do the same as in the morning. They said only today but I will have to always park 5 minutes away in future. They said lots of parents have children at different schools. I do understand that but three schools with five children including a baby and toddler. And having to park up twice and wake them up? If I could park up in the school in the afternoon they could carry on sleeping.

I have only just put my daughter in the third school this week after a school appeal failed. But I just don't think I can do this every day. My kids are crying too much and I am frazzled. Am I being unreasonable to think they might allow me to park in the grounds. All my children are sitting at home as I write crying from it all. I think I am going to take her out tomorrow.

[ScaryMcLary]

Sounds very stressful! I think you need a second pair of hands for an hour each afternoon, either to have the little ones or to do one of the other pick ups. Rather than trying to find a mum to favour swap with, could you afford a mothers help for an hour a day? Could you ask around your neighbourhood? Might suit a retired person?

[Xihha]

Can you ask at any of the schools if they could put a note in the newsletter asking if there are any mums who could walk a child to somewhere more convenient for you so you don't have to get the youngest 2 out the car? I don't know your area but maybe if another mum has to pass where you'd usually park up on her way home she could bring the 1st child you pick up so then you would only have to get the kids out the car once?

[Timetogetserious]

Thanks yet again. Some great suggestions. I think I agree that the school aren't being unreasonable. It was just so easy (comparatively) today.

We can't walk. I have half an hour to be in three places and it would take me half an hour to walk to two of the schools in opposite directions. The third is about a 40 minute walk. Perhaps I'm being unrealistic when I say 5 mins drive. Probably more like 10 minutes each. Love the suggestion about asking a mum to walk my daughter down the hill to me. That would save me getting them out twice. Will sort it out I am sure. Was just very tired today after little sleep and the chasing around all day. Not sure why I am still up!!!! Thanks again.

[sashh]

I think you need to pick up the eldest first and then either go to the other schools with her/him in the car so that they can either stay with the little ones or send them in to pick up. Tell the schools you will be late, it's the only way you can do it.


Ask he school(s) if you can put a notice up or if they can send an e-mail asking if a parent could deliver one or more of your children to the car.

How far are you from your local FE college? The CACHE students (training to work in nurseries) all have to do a work placement as part of their course. It might be difficult to get insurance etc for them to do actual work experience but you might find one willing to sit in your house with the little ones while you do pick up, or to walk your eldest home.

[Tortoiseonthehalfshell]

Sashh, she can't - the eldest child gets out at 3.50, the other two get out at 3.05 and 3.15 respectively. She can't possibly just tell the other schools that she'll be an hour late, not without paying for after-school clubs.

[toomuchicecream]

Try a local secondary school - years 11,12 and 13 are about to go on study leave. I can think of loads (all) of DSs friends who could walk a child home from school for a modest sum of money. They'd all throw a game of football in too...

[mummytime]

See if any of the schools have a newsletter, and put an ad in it. We frequently have them in ours from parents asking for help with school runs.

[Mashabell]

In the days before parental choice, most primary children walked to school and the twice daily traffic chaos of the school run did not exist.

There was much less obesity too.

Bring back catchment areas?

[MyFirstName]

I agree - try and get another parent to help. Maybe print something up on paper with what you need (and why) "Please would someone be able to take MiniTime back to their house for about 10 minutes whilst I juggle my school runs....rushing from x to y to z...blah blah. Willing to offer suitable recompense".

Then I would start by asking your DC's teacher to start with handing them out to your DCs class parents....then go wider in the school if necessary.

IF someone explained to me this was happening in my school I would gladly help (probably for a bottle of wine a term ) . YOu have my sympathies.

[MyFirstName]

Actually if you are in the North Herts area pm me - and we can discuss closer detail and I would seriously be happy to help. I had a year of 45 minute car journeys after we moved for a similar reason -local schools full - one offered crap.

[sotiredtoday]

So sorry to hear about this. You must bear in mind that things can only get better, especially as the baby grows up a bit.

I would support the car-pool options that have been expressed here and ask if perhaps there are older children (in local secondary schools) who might be willing to pick up 1 of your children after school and bring them home. I have heard that there are some schools which go all the way until 18 which have organised a buddy-system for children who travel from outside the local area. Of course, a fee would be in order, but it might help you in the afternoons.

Good luck !

[yegodsandlittlefishes]

1. Taxi. Lots of families around here use a school taxi service, and it isn't as expensive as it sounds.
   

1. Pay a secondary school child interested in childcare to walk one of your children the safest route to you, or be home with the smaller children. Do any of the local secondary schools start and finish early?
   

1. Pay a childminder.
   

1. Do any of the schools have after school care? If the one you pick up first or in the middle could be in after school club for half an hour/an hour, then that would make things manageable.
   

Leaving the children in the car park in the afternoon is not safe. Cars get very hot. The same in the mornings, really. The weather will start getting warmer and the children could get too hot.

[ChuckitintheBucket]

Might it be worth posting on your local mumsnet board, everyone here has been helpful so you never know there may be a mn'er local to you that could help. Good luck.

[Timetogetserious]

Thank you so much for some brilliant ideas. Thought I would be slated for thinking I deserved preferential treatment.

Have woken up with a different head on. Only took 75 mins today. Record. Still late at third school though by two minutes : (.

Will sort something out. Somehow. Especially with all your great suggestions. Day off next week. Yes!!!

[Spindelina]

Just checking... are the schools that your 4yo and 7yo are at within 2 miles (by the shortest safe walking route) of your house? You say they are 40 minutes' walk, which depending on how fast you walk might be more than 2 miles.

If it is more that 2 miles to either of those schools (or 3 miles for the 8yo), get on to the LEA and claim the transport which they should be providing for you.

[Timetogetserious]

Thanks for posting. They are under 2 miles; one only just. But all in different directions : /. I'm ok, feeling ok with my lot today. Just feel like I achieve nothing with my days. But I'm sure I'm not alone in that!!!

[AmberTheCat]

You sound to me like you're achieving a huge amount with your days, especially with a newborn. Hats off to you. Enjoy every minute of the bank holiday!

[BitOutOfPractice]

OP I feel exhausted just reading your posts. It sounds nightnarish!

How about ringing the LEA, explaining the situation and asking if there's any help / solutions they could offer. In my experience they are really helpful and at the end of the say they want yor kids on time in school and if that's just physically impossible, they may be able to help

Have you got names down on the waiting lists for all the schools fr all the kids?

I hope you get something sorted

[AWombWithoutARoof]

It's throwing money at the problem, but what about getting a bigger car, so at least one child doesn't need to get out? Rather drastic, but would it help?

Maybe when you've settled in a bit more a few of you could get together and organise a walking bus, with parents taking it in turns?

[QuiteQuietly]

Timetogetserious Just under 2 miles as the crow flies, or walking route? I think school transport is measured by walking route, which is probably not a direct straight line from school to your house. Worth measuring.

It may also be worth contacting EWO at your council to see if they can help. If your DC are being late for school regularly, and perhaps (ahem) even run a risk of not making it in due to nightmarish school run chaos, then they may be able to assist with something. At our last school, a few persistant offenders were given free breakfast club in order to try and get the kids in school on time and one got a space on a school transport bus even though living fairly nearby. Remember schools are penalised for absence and lateness - the system (in theory) won't want you to fail.

Enjoy your long weekend!

[GhoulWithADragonTattoo]

Have you asked the council if there's a school near you with spaces for all the children. Even if it's a drive away it would be easier to do one longer school run than 3 separate ones I think...

[Chocovore]

Sounds like a nightmare and. Hope some other parents can help you out. I know I would be only too happy to help. But, did you say you are leaving your 7yr old home alone? How long is this for? I wouldn't be comfortable with that I'm afraid and worry you coukd get into trouble for it.

[Timetogetserious]

Hi Chicovore, yes I am leaving her for the last bit - I'm out for about 13 mins. She has my phone number and is a very mature girl. She's fine. I did a lot of thinking and sought guidance re the rules here. Where we live it's fine. I don't think it's allowed in the States. Each child is very different.

Today was better. I did as you suggested and took the pram. I put little one in the sling and toddler in pram, one hand on both. Got to school 2 25 mins late but I refuse to get stressed anymore!!

[MidniteScribbler]

Who is looking after your child when you are 20-25 minutes late every day?

[SauceForTheGander]

Yes some local MN sites are busy and friendly do your's might be useful.

Also Facebook have parenting groups so you might find done one who can help with school runs.

Everything feels like shit when you've got a teeny baby and not sleeping. Don't make any major decisions about removing DCs from school just yet - especially if they are happy.

I'd be contacting all heads for a 1:1 to ex