"Exceptional circumstances" for authorised absence

[Number42]

We have a family celebration overseas next term which we think it is important for our kids to attend. We're going for the minimum time physically possible - 48 hours - but that still means we need to miss one day of school. The HT has refused to authorise, saying she can only do it under "exceptional circumstances". As far as we can see there's no set definition of that term, and so actually she COULD do it if she wanted to. We feel really uncomfortable: we love the school, the kids are doing well, we support it 100% and now it feels as if we've been given something like an Asbo for one day of school....Has anyone come across a definition of what are "exceptional" circumstances, or examples where HT has authorised?

[rabbitstew]

prh47bridge - a political decision is a political decision. I discern no radical differences between any of the major political parties - they all encourage greed, corruption, hypocrisy and stupidity, not to mention silly targets which create unhelpful, artificial and self-serving behaviour. I therefore see no merit whatsoever in the argument that any other party would have done the same thing.

HT discretion has changed - the rules have specifically been changed. Parents may never have had a right to term time holidays, but the legislation specifically included the possibility that they could be permitted in special circumstances. Now you have made it quite clear yourself that a HT is no longer expected to use their discretion to allow any kind of holiday, even one day off to go to a wedding. That is a massive change, and what is more, it will not stop the main offenders from going on 10-day holidays, it will just alienate those who would never consider doing such a thing, but who find it a gross infringement on family life to be told they are harming their child's education to take one day off school for a rare family event. If an absence bears no real risk of harming a particular child's education, then the patronising comments about how much one day of school represents in percentage terms, and how relatives shouldn't have the cheek to marry in term time, should be saved for someone else.

In another thread you appeared to think it possible to create compassion in the NHS by setting the right targets. I think this weird mentality that you can cause common sense and compassion by setting targets, can use sledgehammers to crack nuts, and that a problem isolated to particular groups of people can be solved by hitting everyone with a "solution" which actually impacts more on those who weren't the problem than those who were, is part of the problem... Along with thinking that bad headteachers' "discretion" can be improved by taking it away from them.

[givemeaclue]

Guidance from our school, on the request for exceptional leave form, says family celebrations including weddings are not considered as grounds.

The school is not stopping you from going. They can't authorise it but just take it as unauthorised absence.

School are just following the rules, up to you whether you go or not

[NearTheWindmill]

prh47bridge. You have clarified the points and set out the parameters. However, what really irked parents when my children were at primary (and they are 19 and 15 now) was the fact that the head was quite draconian about authorising absence for holidays even back then and it was very much frowned upon. It isn't something we ever asked for because we think there are 12 weeks and 52 weekends to take time out but the one occasion we needed an extra few days due to a cancelled summer holiday, death of a grandparent and family at breaking point it was happily granted.

Anyway I have digressed because what irked was the draconian attitude combined with the fact that the last week of any term usually was entirely wasted learning time with games in the garden, videos, sing alongs, parties, etc. No learning happened in that week; instead one collected bored and/or overexcited children.

I am all for children having 100% attendance but if the school wishes to dictate this by refusing to authorise reasonable absences then in my opinion schools should be obliged to maximise learning during every week of term and not allow the sort of last week hoolies that seem to go on. Frankly there is more learning from a trip to Ancient Greece (40% cheaper than a week later) than there is in most schools during the last week of any term.

By all means everyone should abide by the rules but that applies also to those who are running schools. And actually isn't it correct that parents are not legally obliged to send their children to school, merely to educate them so if a parent decides a trip will be educational whereas a Disney video will not be where is the logic in that please.

[cory]

Personally I can see why it would be a nightmare to a HT to have to decide that one family's trip to Greece was educational but that the trips of 35 other families in the school to family in India were not.

There are schools where 75% of the children have their families abroad; often in places which take a long time to travel to. It would be incredibly different to differentiate between them without incurring (possibly well deserved) accusations of racism.

Imo (and I do have all my family abroad) discretion should be used for family disasters: bereavement, serious illness etc.

Though I do think, re Windmill's post, that time travel should be allowed: especially as most sources seem to agree that it takes up none of our time at all. So really not reason to deny family trips to Ancient Greece at all.

As for parents not having to educate their children in school- well, they don't have to choose that option, but once they have chosen it they have to stick to the rules. I don't have to take a job at X company, but once I have taken it I can't dip in and out of it at my pleasure.

Otoh I have no sympathy for HT's who use Ofsted pressure to bully and intimidate the parents of a sick or bereaved child. I would rather resign my job and live on the streets than treat any human being the way my dd has been treated. There can't be any stress that excuses that. Nobody has to be a HT if they can't do the job and behave like a decent human being.

[rabbitstew]

And to argue, "oh, just take the day off as an unauthorised absence if it's that important to you - you won't be punished," is like saying, "oh, just behave a bit more like the people we were trying to reach when we changed the legislation." And sorry, but I don't think a funeral is more meritorious than a wedding. Some family events are more important than one day of school and every bit as important as any religious event specifically protected by legislation (in fact, they often are religious events, but I really don't see their importance being diminished if they aren't...). Yet the mantra these days is that "holidays" are not permissible, so people are left scrabbling around for silly ways to describe a day off school that will maximise their chances of being given authorisation - because people don't actually like doing "unauthorised" things, unless and until they lose respect for the whole system. To hasten the day when nobody respects authority seems a tad foolish to me.

[meditrina]

One day of for a wedding wouldn't have fallen differently under the old wording - what was removed was up to 10 days for a 'family holiday'.

HT's can exercise their discretion for other absences exactly as before.

I agree with cory

[rabbitstew]

cory - tbh, I don't see why it would be difficult to distinguish between a once-in-a-lifetime trip (and you would know it was, because you would only permit it once....) and an annual trip.

[rabbitstew]

meditrina - HTs can't exercise their discretion exactly as before, because they don't appear to understand they can exercise it exactly as before, hence the schools not authorising absences, but giving their blessing to them, anyway. That is a result of political pressure from the powers that be who are only interested in bald statistics, not personal sob stories.

[prh47bridge]

rabbitstew - It doesn't matter how often you deny the truth, HT discretion has NOT changed. The way they exercise that discretion may have changed but legally they still have the same discretion they had before. HTs were NEVER expected to use their discretion to allow holidays other than in special circumstances (and "it is cheaper in term time" is not a special circumstance). They were NEVER expected to use their discretion to allow a day off to attend a wedding.

I am sorry that you consider telling the truth to be a gross infringement on family life. There is abundant evidence to show that days off damage the education of that child and also of other children in the class. There is also abundant evidence to show that those children who are taken out of school by parents for holidays, family events, etc. during primary school are more likely to play truant as they get older.

I do not think it is possible to create compassion in the NHS by setting the right targets and have never said so. My point was that you can only control something if you can measure it. If you want the NHS to be more compassionate you need a way of measuring how compassionate it is (patient surveys, for example) otherwise you have no idea whether or not you are succeeding.

NearTheWindmill - I largely agree. Some schools waste too much time as holidays approach.

isn't it correct that parents are not legally obliged to send their children to school, merely to educate them

As Cory says, you don't have to send your child to school but once you have chosen to do so you have to stick to the rules.

[rabbitstew]

prh47bridge - it doesn't matter how often you deny the truth, but the law has changed and therefore the way discretion is exercised has had to change. It was perfectly within a HT's discretion to allow one day off school as a holiday, to go to a wedding, before, given that it was within the HT's discretion to consider a wedding a "special circumstance" and a day off school is a holiday... Either someone has discretion or they don't - to tell them that they shouldn't be doing something, because it was never intended they use their discretion for that is the same things as saying they DO NOT HAVE DISCRETION.

[rabbitstew]

There is no evidence WHATSOEVER that taking a day off primary school to go to a wedding harms a child's education. Don't conflate truants and regular holiday takers with people who take one day off school. That's just ludicrous.

[rabbitstew]

And there you go again - talking about controlling compassion. You can't control compassion, even if you can measure it.

[cory]

The problem is that if 75% of the class have family abroad, allowing each of them 10 days off, even as a one off, will cause disruption to the teaching and make extra work for the teacher.

Besides, how do you keep tabs on how many trips to India a child has made during his entire school career anyway? Lots of children change schools between infants and junior and again between junior and secondary. And how do you decide that a trip to Athens is more of a lifetime event than a trip to Mumbai?

I am under no illusion regarding the disruption and extra work caused to the school by dd's frequent health absences. They have been disruptive. The only difference is that dd cannot help herself.

[rabbitstew]

Clearly, cory, the school think your dd can help herself. It sucks when people don't believe you, doesn't it? It also sucks when all people have to be treated as though they are in a class where 75% of children take a once-in-a-lifetime trip all in the same year, even when that isn't the case.

[NearTheWindmill]

But my children, who between them have completed 25 years of school between them have lost two days of school each due to an exceptional requirement during time of crisis. In primary I think they probably lost 15 days each per year due to mucking about during the last week of term.

It is those sorts of practices that need to be dealt with by government policy - ie make sure the professionals are fulfilling their responsibilities too. It makes my blood boil.

Give me a good reason why parents should be slammed for poor practice when schools are not.

Outstanding primary btw - top the league tables - head's view "look at the great job we are doing, everyone needs a break including the teachers". So, break up a week early then!

[ShoeWhore]

Time off to visit family overseas was always a separate kind of leave to holidays anyway - has that changed?

Our LA has issued advice to schools on this topic. What's allowed includes things like:

• day off for a wedding of a parent or where the children has a significant role in the wedding (eg bridesmaid)
• leave where a member of the immediate family has a critical illness

Can't remember the others off the top of my head but you get the jist.
Quite a few families at our school have chosen to take the leave unauthorised this year - it's not entirely clear what's going to happen tbh.

[cory]

Incidentally, I think you can control compassion by giving very specific training to HT's and administrative staff about how to deal with families struggling with serious problems.

Being taught what a reasonable response looks like does affect how people respond.

I saw it very clearly at dd's junior school: because the HT had a very negative attitude towards ill or disabled people, the admin staff gradually fell into an office culture where suspicion and irritation were the default position when they were confronted by a situation involving illness or disability. It became so habitual that they probably didn't even notice it, because noone in authority ever suggested to them that it was wrong. Teachers were afraid to ask for help from the head and deputy head; in fact, dd's first teacher told me outright that she would rather not approach her superiors to ask for support for dd.

Her secondary otoh had a can-do attitude towards any problem that arose and it made a massive difference to the staff on the frontline. Th

In my current job (university) we have a very firm policy of pastoral support towards students who are struggling with health issues, including MH. As a result, when I am faced with a student whose attendance is dropping or who is behaving oddly, my immediate response is not "I shouldn't have to deal with this" but "I know how to deal with this: these are the people I should turn to". And knowing that I have that backing from my employers makes me less anxious and more able to respond sympathetically and usefully.

My db is in the merchant navy. They have very regular emergency training: the aim is precisely to control the panic response of the crew by making sure they know exactly what to do in an emergency. I have always known my db as a somewhat anxious and overreacting person, but on the day when he was confronted with a sinking ship he was totally calm and in control and helped to save several lives- because his training had been good and he knew what to do. And once he knew what to do, he also knew that he had to do it, that standing around wringing his hands was not an option open to him.

[DameDeepRedBetty]

Meanwhile statistics for the incidence of D & V on Fridays and Mondays will continue to be skewed!

[MadeOfStarDust]

"authorising" a leave of absence during term time round here just used to be a way of assuaging middle class guilt at taking the kids out for a trip/wedding/holiday whatever.... You KNOW it is the wrong thing to do really... but "The Head said it was OK" ...etc..

Lot less odd days out being taken round here now - shows the tightening up is working I guess...

[rabbitstew]

Then, cory, you will understand that rigid targets and a political focus on attendance is doing nothing to increase compassion and therefore nothing to make anything better.

[cory]

rabbitstew Wed 18-Dec-13 09:50:42
"It also sucks when all people have to be treated as though they are in a class where 75% of children take a once-in-a-lifetime trip all in the same year, even when that isn't the case."

Isn't the alternative a situation where you can have holiday time off as long as there aren't too many Asian families or families with sick children in your school? I can see problems with that take too, tbh.

[rabbitstew]

Or do you think the current colossal pressure on schools, headteachers and teachers, and constant criticism of training, and pressure to allow untrained teachers to teach in schools, is good for stress and response levels? I see no evidence of careful training to ensure appropriate responses, just lots of evidence of ramping up of pressure and resulting poor and panicked decisions.

[rabbitstew]

Seems to me the current situation is creating more primary schools like the one your dd went to, cory.

[rabbitstew]

And no, even in a school where most of the children are from Asian families, I really don't see why all of them would be taking their only ever term-time holiday at precisely the same time, tbh.

[rabbitstew]

As for only being allowed holidays if there aren't too many sick children in your school - why should that happen, unless the focus is on targets, not individuals?