Really need advice. Son really confused and worried.

[Onlyyou2468]

My son is 12, nearly 13. He said for sometime he has had feelings from time to time about imagining himself as a girl/female. He wasnt worried about these feelings but he googled it as he was interested and the first article that came up was about Autogynephillia, I personally had never heard of this before. The article that he read said, men with this are normally selfish narcissists, who have failed marriages and financial failure, destroying their relationships. He was absolutely beside himself after reading this. The first thing I knew of there being something wrong was when he asked if I thought he was a narcissist, he is the polar opposite of one, he then burst into tears and it was 2 hours before he told me and he kept saying that it was so bad, he just couldn't tell me. Fast forward 2 weeks and he still needs reassurance every day, he thinks he is a bad person and he is worried he will have a miserable life. :-( hes such a kind, clever boy he hates to upset anyone. He suffers from ocd/intrusive thoughts too. What can I say to him to reassure him? Help please xxx

[Onlyyou2468]

Ps. He has privacy settings on his tablet but obviously this has made me re-evaluate the use of internet. He also admitted to googling health symptoms a lot on there..

[Modestandatinybitsexy]

If he was a narcissist he wouldn't care about being one. He's obviously a lovely sensitive boy. It's probably best to have a conversation about real world conversations vs googling.

If you're worried about the googling it might be worth showing him how ridiculous the internet can be with symptom spotting and how it's better to talk it through in real life so if he does need any help you can help make him an appointment.

This also works personality wise. It's not up to a stranger on the internet to tell him who he is, it's up to him to decide how he wants to be and how to act.

[Onlyyou2468]

Thank you ladies. Obviously I'm kicking myself on having such loose rules on the internet front, although we have got privacy settings. I have said, we only use the internet together or he uses it to google his interests. In terms of his feelings, he said he doesn't want to be female but can imagine himself as one?

[Onlyyou2468]

Has anyone had children who are having the same thoughts?

[Onlyyou2468]

He said the thoughts he had initially he wasnt worried about, it's only when he googled it, that he said he could find nothing good about it and if he turns out to be like that then he will have a miserable life. I looked up the term and it's all negative, I agree but I'm sure lots of people have thoughts like this, I cant see why it's so bad.