To go to preschool or not go to preschool

[Mmamadness]

I'm in a bit of a predicament about whether or not to and my 2yo son to preschool. He has not long since turned 2 (last month), is rather shy around other children, and is very strongly attached to me (as I am to him). However, he doesn't get as much attention from me at home anymore as I also have a 3-month-old; I take him outside to the park etc every single day so we get time for just the two of us but at home I can tell he's bored when I'm seeing to baby.

Despite being 2yo, he cannot yet talk - my HV had advised taking him to playgroups and going to preschool to socialise with children his own age which should help his language development.

Today I took him to playgroup for the first time and he loved it! I was so delighted! He was confidently running around playing and even approached a few children to engage in play with which made me so happy to see him coming out of his shell.

I noticed that a lot of the time he wasn't even looking for me to see if I was there (whereas when we go to the park, soft play centres etc) he always checks to see where I am. But today he was too busy playing and having fun, only looking for me a handful of times. He was so upset when the session was over as he was having so much fun.

This got me thinking as to whether he is ready for preschool. He would get to spend longer there paying and engaging with children his own age, but I'm just worried how he will be without me there at such a young age.

All of the preschools that are accessible to me only offer 3 full days a week under the 15hrs free 2 year old child care. I was really hoping to start him on just one or two half days a week and work our way up to longer. I feel so worried about leaving him there and not being able to see if he's in trouble, etc, which sounds a bit overbearing I know, but he's my baby and he's still so young. It worries me that if he feels sad or someone else is mean to him he can't even tell anyone whats happened yet.

So what do you think would be the best solution? I'm contemplating just continuing with playgroup for now and maybe looking at preschools for summer or autumn term? Has anyone else been in this situation and what was the outcome?

I'm sure there's many other posts like this but I wanted to share my personal situation to get the best response.

Thanks!

[NewName24]

If you are entitled to 2 yr old funding, and have a Nursery near you that can take him, then I think it would be lovely for him to have the chance to do all they can offer him.

[hoarahloux]

You might struggle to find a place at a preschool before September. They fill up quickly.

One or two half days a week, he will really struggle to settle in. It'll take so much longer and be distressing for both of you. I would do at least three half days if you can.

[SaltyGod]

Sounds like he’s ready to go.

I also agree that two few sessions could be unsettling, and many nurseries have a minimum No of days for this reason.

You’ll also be able to do settling in sessions with him, and the staff are experts at making small children feel happy and comfortable.

Without meaning to sound harsh, the reasons you’ve mentioned for not going seem to be more about you being upset than him. Maybe it’s time to give it a try.

[BigdreamerSmallperson]

Settling sessions help, my niece struggled at first but now she loves it. At home he can do learning on youtube and Patreon, my little ones watch Ms Rachel and School of G (they love school of G!) Really good resources on patreon and puppet, bsl content

I hope that helps x

[Februarydaffodil]

OP it sounds like a lovely time was had . Why don’t you carry on with a couple of different playgroups a week and try and line something up for September . It is possible that you and he will make friends at these playgroups if you become a regular - which gives you options to do meet ups with others at the playground as well . I personally think 3 full days is a lot if it’s not needed due to work . I have teens though . When mine were small there were still lots of options for morning sessions only - a lot of that provision in my area has closed down now as more people need a full time place

[Londonforestmum]

My DS's childminder took him to playgroups till he started preschool at 3 (well he was 3 and a quarter due to having to wait till September). Felt like a good transition to me and he's had no problems so far. As previous poster has said why don't you carry on with the playgroups for now. What's a full day at the preschool is it 9-3?

On the speaking front, from what I've read children learn to speak most from adults engaging in one 2 one conversations with them. So I don't think preschool is necessarily going to help with that anymore than him being at home with you (as long as you're chatting away to him?)

[MusicMum80s]

He should go. He’s clearly ready and it’s been advised by his HV as well.

15 hours a week is nothing and 2 year olds do need socialisation.

It sounds more like you aren’t ready perhaps…

[UrsulaSings123]

My son went at 2 and he didn't get on with it. The other children were closer to 3 which is a big difference at that age and he was by far the youngest. He couldn't tell me if anything was wrong, but he started crying when I would take him before we'd even got there. It was too much for him and I took him out. We're trying again this Sept at age 4 and I'm hoping he will get on much better. If it was me I would stick to play groups for now then try when they're a bit older, but all children are different and my son is very sensitive and takes a while to warm up.