Stupid things I have read.

[pie]

I was reading 'Pregnancy' by Gordon Bourne (The Pregnancy Bible 600,000 copies sold, or so it says on the front) and came across these two gems:

"Here is a guarantee: if you are normal weight before your pregnancy, and use no special support, don't wear one during pregnancy, don't gain more than 10kg, don't have twins or extra amniotic fluid - then 3 months after delivery your abdomen will be as good as it ever was. No marks, just as flat, just as strong and just as nice in any bikini"

"It used to be said that every woman was allowed to gain 6.4kg per baby. What a tragic comment. Any woman who has gained an excessive amount of weight in pregnancy and who finds herslef to be overweight after delivery and the puerperium should go on a reducing diet as soon as possible so that she returns to her original weight, regardless of whether she is breast-feeding or not"

"... at total weight gain of 9-12kg is all that should be allowed throughout pregnancy"

Now am I being oversensitive or is there something very wrong about what this Doctor is writing, especially if it really is the best selling pregnancy book.

To mears and leese, is this a healthy set of attitudes towards pregnant women? Is this really how Obstetricians think?

[StripyMouse]

Tissy - eek! I know he has medical experience, my comment was just a jokey one pointing out the obvious fact that he hasn?t been through it firsthand physically (beng a man and all...) and therefore is unaware of how seemingly patronising and insensitive his comments are to those actually going through pregnancy. That?s all.

[emwi]

I found the whole of "what to eat when you're expecting" from the "what to expect when you're expecting" school of books utterly depressing and useless, partly because for the first three months I could only keep down apple, cheese and fairy cakes and partly because, even when I felt better, it was too much information and I felt guilty for my non balanced diet which included none of the foods listed containing selenium or whatever.

[GeorginaA]

was that the one with the "best odds diet"? I have to say I laughed at that one and carried on eating whatever I fancied... I'm sure that's why I didn't have that many cravings... never denied myself anything to have cravings!

[StripyMouse]

I agree emwi - all the diet info is great in theory but can create a huge amount of stress, guilt and anxiety for those of us who are just unable to meet all of these "requirements" through serious queasiness or actual sickness. I think it is better to know what not to eat and then just do your best based on common sense.

[aloha]

I quite liked being pregnant, apart from the not drinking to excess bit, obviously. Never sick, strong as horse, very happy to have baby inside me. I never even felt fat for a minute, just round. Felt rather funky in fact. Afterwards I felt like a mutant fat blob. Still do, in fact, nearly two years on. There was a moment after birth when I sobbed to dh, "I never, ever would have had a baby if I knew it would destroy my body like this.' I worship the ground ds toddles on but my continuing fatness is actually what's putting me off having another child, I find it so upsetting. I think Prof Bourne should be shot, personally. He's not the kind of guy to make me feel better.

[Marina]

I think the "best odds diet" is the funniest and most ridiculous section in any pregnancy book. I especially like the bit where camembert features in the suggestions for your teeny tiny daily cheese ration.

[WideWebWitch]

I burnt the pregnancy nutrition book I had last time it annoyed me so much. Very satisfying.

[motherinferior]

a friend chucked Penelope Leach out of the window...

Pie, I'm sure your aunt is a wonderful woman but I don't think she gets out enough - or at least not to the right places...

[mears]

I have actually never seen the book you mention at the start of the thread. Personally I do not like seeing women get a hard time over weight gain. My sister had a horrendous time being weighed and criticised at every visit 13 years ago and it traumatised her severely.
The women I feel most sorry for are those who are very obese - they may be advised to curtail weight gain in pregnancy, but they are often in a no win situation because they are miserable and find they eat more and the weight goes on. To me there is absolutely no point in making them feel any worse but I know an anaesthetist who believes he must lecture them about the health risks so that they will do something about their weight post delivery, as if a diet will solve everything.
I piled on stones in my first pregnancy - not advisable perhaps, but totally out of my control
There is no doubt about it pie, there are some weight obsessed obstetricians and midwives. There is no doubt that it is better not to gain too much weight, but it isn't that simple.

[pie]

HAHAHAHAHAH stuff this up your coat Dr Bourne. Just got home after seeing the consultant.

I was very overweight before I got pregnant (honestly due to glands!! but thats another story, I'll find somewhere else to moan about that), since I've been pregnant I've lost the grand total of 17 kilos, and am still losing though it has slowed down. Still getting morning sickness.

So consultant prescribes drugs to stop vomitting and tells me catagorically than I musn't lose anymore AT ALL, I have to go back in 3 weeks and he wants to see me gaining, despite the fact I'm already overweight.

So Dr Bourne can shove it

[SofiaAmes]

It's so silly, because the weight you gain during pregnancy is mostly due to hormones. I puked 5 times a day for the first four months of both my pregnancies and still managed to gain 20 of the 45 pounds I gained with each pregnancy during the first 4 months. My dh is still trying to figure out how I managed to gain so much weight since I seemed to vomit everything I ate. Anyway the good news is that I lost it all both times within 6-9 months of having my babies without dieting.

Pie, my mother says that in her day it was considered unhealthy to gain more than 15 lbs or so with your pregnancy, but that nowadays it's not considered unhealthy to gain far more. My anecdotal observation seems to be that women who start out skinny before pregnancy seem to gain a lot more (and lose it afterwards) than women who start out overweight.

[mammya]

Apparently, that's what they think in France, when it comes to the weight gain...

[mammya]

Apparently, that's what they think in France, when it comes to the weight gain...

[mammya]

Sorry about the double posting!

[pupuce]

I agree Sofia - I am 5'11" and a size 10.... gained 40lbs (at least.... stopped the weigh in at 36 weeks!)... with both pregnancies and now I am a size 8 !!!
I know life is unfair.... I don't ever diet, eat loads (healthy food on the whole), do zero exercise.... but my family is all skinny and I am very active..... but I had no problem getting very big in pregnancy ! Everyone was amazed.

[susanmt]

If this book is good about complications, could you have a look in it for me and see if it has anything about Renal or Uteric colic, kidney stones (could also be renal calculi). I'm trying to find out as much as I can and there is nothing in any pregnancy book I can find (not that rare, 1:2000 pregnancies).
Mears, if you are there, do you know if there is a consultant ob in Glasgow (thats where you are isnt it) who specialises in renal problems in pregnancy? I have to see a specialist obstetrician and my GP says she thinks its in Glasgow, just wondered if you could fill me in!!
ps sorry to hijack thread for a second!

[mears]

Sorry Susanmt - I am not in Glasgow but nearby in Ayrshire. I will see what I can find out though, because we refer to Glasgow when need be.

[Rkayne]

I'm only 5'0" and gained 40lbs with both pregnancies! With pg1 it took me almost a year to lose it and get back into those size 8 jeans. Will have to get back to you about pg2 as I still have a week to go.

But for a book that puts a much more realistic (and funny!) perspective on things, try reading The Best Friends Guide to Pregnancy by Vicki Iovine. She's not a doctor or midwife so there's not much actual medical stuff in it but she's a mum of 4 and shares all her own stories and those of her friends. it gives a refreshingly honest (and non-panic inducing!) view of the whole thing.

[motherinferior]

Just don't read the later VI books where she gets a bit heavy on how little you need to eat to get your figure back. Which may be true, but is kind of depressing.

The whole thing is very bewildering. And take it from me, even if you've put on less than a stone people still comment on how enormous you are.