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anyone having touble agreeing on names with their partners

40 replies

Rachael17 · 02/06/2003 20:53

i have a whole list of names that i love but my b/f doesnt like them
the only ones we've agreed on are charlotte abby and harmony
but we cant decided on boys names
also having probs with my family over surname for baby
i want my b/fs surname (as does he) but my family are heavily objecting
any tips on keeping the peace

OP posts:
SamboM · 04/06/2003 12:00

wickedwaterwitch I would be more concerned at being named after some kind of horlicksy drink, I know Milo isn't common here but it is all over the world lol! Still a nice name though.

elliott · 04/06/2003 12:08

bunnyrabbit, my ds also has my surname as a middle name, and it is just an ordinary surname. I'd never thought of him wanting to double barrell it later (it doesn't work particularly well with dh's name), but having capitulated over him having dh's surname I was determined that he have my heritage somewhere! We also gave him an 'ordinary' middle name as well, so he has three first names, but I just wanted to avoid a situation where he was embarrassed about his middle name because it wasn't a 'proper' name. This way he can ignore it if he chooses.
Actually both my mum and SIL have surnames as second names, it is not that uncommon.

bunnyrabbit · 04/06/2003 12:11

OK. I'll mention it to Mr bunny and see what he says. As I said, I do have a very unusual surname, but it would be nice if baby bunny could have my name insame shape or form. Tah for the ideas guys.

SamboM · 04/06/2003 12:15

Bunnyrabbit, isn't it obvious? Peter or Bugs!

janh · 04/06/2003 12:17

What is it with men and weird names?

When we were arguing about names for DD1 DH wanted (NB these are not weird names as such, I know there will be mumsnetters with them, just not right for a baby in 1982) Christine or Lesley or Alison or Stephanie. Must have had something to do with the girls at his primary school I think!

Milo is a lovely name, it's Irish isn't it? It is a bit sad about the Tweenies. Isn't one of Mary Wesley's characters called Milo?

WideWebWitch · 04/06/2003 12:48

Wills, I'm with you on Lazlo or however it's spelt. Oh no, Milo's a hot drink is it? Can't give the poor child a name with connotations of slippers and fire and middle age! Mind you, the Milo in 24 was a cool sort of guy...Janh, agree with you about those names and 1982, my mum's called Christine and it's very of its time I think.

Azzie · 04/06/2003 13:32

I didn't change my name when I got married. Both my kids have DH's surname - he wanted it, and as I had such a close bond with them (pregnancy, breastfeeding etc) and he felt a bit left out when they were tiny I was fine with him having his way. It's never caused any problems so far, and DS (5yo) now finds it very amusing that they all have the same name and Mummy is the odd one out!

nobby · 04/06/2003 14:22

I didn't change my name when we got married and my dh made noises about even taking my surname when we had a child (we both wanted the same surname as our baby). And I have the best surname But of course that went out the window when it happened. dh's dad went apoplectic at the thought of his one and only grandson not carrying on the family name (dh is an only child) and no-one else cared enough to cause him a coronary so we gave in. I've changed my surname now (what a palava that is) and actually quite like it.

Boe · 04/06/2003 15:06

My maiden name was really boring and married someone witrh a really boring surname. Am now in the process of being divorced and my partner has an equally boring surname. The lady who sits next to me at work has a dutch surname which I have just found out she chose off of her bosses rolodex after her divorce because she did not like her maiden name either!!

I would do the guilt thing though - if not just keep calling the baby what you want to call it - my best friend called her child Oscar (which I think is really cute!!) her husband wanted Freddie but we liked Oscar better so all of her friends and family just called him Oscar and it stuck!!

slug · 04/06/2003 15:48

I kept my own name after getting married partly because I didn't want to be seen as dh's posession (hangover from my radical feminist youth), partly because at 36 I'd had mine for so long it would seem strange to change it, but mostly because it is the ultimate porn star name. I've caught a drunken dh trawling the internet for websites with my porn name. He's found heaps.

The sluglet has his name. I wasn't bothered and his parents were keen on it. As to her first name, she got the feminized version of the boy's name we had chosen partly because he refused point blank to have the name I wanted (Ngaire) and partly because we thought she was a boy for the first 20 minutes of her life

nerdgirl · 04/06/2003 15:55

A sweet old dear who lived near us was christened Brigid back in 1910 because her father insisted she be named after his mother. In those days, apparently, mothers didn't attend the christening!?! So her poor mother had no say in the matter even though she hated the name.

She got her own back though. She flatly refused to use the name 'Brigid' and used the name 'Baby' instead and for the rest of her 82 years that is the name everyone called her!

I know it's not really relevant, I just love the story. Passive resistance in feminism!

janh · 04/06/2003 16:40

Look what's in the Guardian today!,3605,969833,00.html

Coincidence or what?

nobby · 04/06/2003 17:11

slug. I love your mix of radical feminism and porn What a modern woman!

WideWebWitch · 04/06/2003 17:16

That's interesting isn't it Janh?

ninja · 04/06/2003 17:21

love charlotte - go for abigail not abby, you can still shorten it.

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