Am unexpectedly pregnant again, scared (and sick)

[Slickbird]

Hey,

I'm unxexpectedly pregnant again (No.3), now 6wks + and am already feeling sick and feeling pretty miserable. My last two pregnancies were just awful; bad sickness for 21wks, SPD, IBS, Rib Flare etc etc. Then my labours were equally awful - back to back and long, failed epidurals needing blood patch tests as it had gone right through.... I could go on. But now, I just feel really lost what to do. I can't imagine having an abortion, I absolutely LOVE my two girls to bits and fear I would wonder who the little guy was that I didn't have. There are slight differences so far, I don't have sore breasts this time and while I had a bad day today, at this point wiht the last baby I was already really bad. I just have felt today like I'm not sure I can go through it all again as my little girl is only 10months and the other is 7 years - given that I can barely raise a smile at the moment I don't want to spoil my time with my children now. Does that make sense? Financially it is going to put us under even more strain too.

Sorry this is so long, but if anyone has any advice or been through something similar, I would like to hear from them. I am also on a fixed term contract (Covering someone elses maternity leave) and will prob have to tell my manager next week. HELP!!

[Slickbird]

That's interesting about the hormones still being in the system. Although I can't believe you manage to do anything without eating first!!! I have amazed myself what I've packed away in a day, just trying to keep the sickness at er...bay. (That rhymed!) I am also hoping that the labour and birth will be easier because it's the third one.

I am still better than last time at this point - last time I hadn't left the house in over a week cos I was so sick, whereas this time I am still getting up and going to work to be at my desk for 8.30, so that's all good. I do find tho that I'm worse as the day goes on, and by evening time I have to slope off to bed. (Which is why I haven't been able to post in the evening and too busy through the day!) What about yourself?

[pgwithnumber3]

Hi Slickbird, glad you are feeling better about things. Your life seems to be running at a parallel with mine, albeit a few weeks behind!

I took am nauseous a lot of the time, yesterday I nearly fainted in the morning as I had done too much before eating my breakfast.

I too have had an easier time of the early weeks than I did the last 2 pgs. The midwife said that is because my body is still carrying hormones from the last pg! Great hey, at least there is some godsend to having 2 close together! She also said labour and birth should be easier.

Lucky you with the school run although I do like having to do the school run as it makes me more organised (i.e. all dressed, dishwasher loaded etc).

[Slickbird]

Hello everybody! Thanks for all the posts! I've been too busy to get on line in the last couple of days, but doing not bad at all. I think things are finally sinking in and the fear is starting to dissapate a little! Especially as I am still making it into work and am better than I was with DD2 at this stage, so I am keeping my fingers crossed it stays more manageable. I'm very nausious a lot of the time, but if I keep eating it's ok. Although it's tough as my 7 year old doesn't know yet and she keeps following me around going 'Have you got a sweetie?? What are you eating? Can I have one??!' She doesn't get sweets as a rule - only for treats so it's very hard for me to justify it without telling her the reason I need something to sook on!

Better go for the moment, bambino is needing a bath and is a lovely orange colour from her dinner.

By the way, I feel really guilty as my neighbour takes my oldest for the school run and is fantastic, so I won't have that problem. Am v. lucky I know.

Later.....

[pgwithnumber3]

I'm fine thank you, had a quiet day as DH took DD1 out all day so just me and DD2. Had a lovely nap this afternoon. Bliss.

How are you? When you are in Southport give me a wave, I don't live too far from the centre.

[gigglewitch]

how's things today ladies?

[pgwithnumber3]

Why not put them in the uniform on Monday morning and don't take it off until Friday evening!?

How are you doing today slickbird? Has it sunk in anymore?

[gigglewitch]

[pgwithnumber3]

LOL, good idea about uniform! DD has broken up so no more pj watch. Although they were all uber glam in DD's school. Was a bit disconcerting to say the least, especially if I didn't have my Juicy Tube lipgloss on.

[LackaDAISYcal]

My DH is pretty hands on when he is here as well and all but takes over the domestic side of the kids, allowing me to MN play with them more.

I will be surrepticiously(sp?) looking for pjs on Monday

When my friend went back to work after ML, she was really worried about her morning routine...so she used to put her DD to bed wearing the leggings/tshirt combo she would be in the next day. ......wonder if I can send DS to bed in his uniform?

[pgwithnumber3]

Snap LACKS, DH doesn't work away but is out for 12 hours a day, starting at 7am and just getting in as they are going to bed. I don't get a lot of help with children in the week and weekends are caught up with cleaning dogs kennels and walking them etc (a whole other thread). He is a fab dad though but just not here as much as i would like.

[pgwithnumber3]

Have to say giggle, I am a polished mother and look nothing but perfect every minute of every day!

[gigglewitch]

don't you wish you knew how many mums on the playground have their pj top still on - and most have not had time to find their hairbrush

[LackaDAISYcal]

oh, and DH works away three/sometimes four nights a week

[gigglewitch]

stay chilled. you know you can do it

[LackaDAISYcal]

I know how you feel. I got pregnant again when my DD was only 8 months so will have 17 months between them when DC3 is born in november. It was all a bit scary and daunting at first, especially as we had decided that two was enough and that I was just getting over a bout of really bad PND that had almost had me hospitalised.

Buuuuut, i'm now 23 weeks and actually looking forward to it, and think that it will complete the family iyswim.

like pgwithNo3 though, the thought of the school run is filling me with dread as I only got to the stage of getting all three of us washed and dressed before leaving the house a few months ago. DS was OK (thankfully) but either DD was still in her pjs, or she was dressed, but I had just thrown on some clothes with bed hair and often not even a quick splosh of water hitting my face

It'll be tough, but I keep telling myself that others have done it so I can manage it too.

Wishing you lots of luck

[pgwithnumber3]

that should read mumorDH

[pgwithnumber3]

Haha, that will be me, still in pjs picking up from school! Will just send mum or DH the chauffeur!

I am quite a calm mum but I just know DC3 is going to tip me over the edge. < Writes prescription out for valium>

[gigglewitch]

it will be fab. just think how well they will play together DS2 and DD are 2yrs apart and are inseparable, they're like a little old married couple sometimes and they finish each others sentences OK it will be blardy hard work for a while. but like you say, well worth it. I had the jitters over getting school age child out in the morning whilst coping with toddler and newborn, the thing was that I got him ready, DH dropped him off and I managed to get toddler, baby and me dressed and out by 3:30 to go and collect him

[pgwithnumber3]

Beginning of Feb - am nearly 11 weeks - it is going to fly this pregnancy, mainly because I am dreading having ANOTHER newborn baby!

[gigglewitch]

was just thinking how small tis too.

when's DC3 due?

[pgwithnumber3]

Do you live in the lovely place in St H beginning with E then!?

Small world and all that.

[gigglewitch]

meaning that you've discovered my hiding place

[gigglewitch]

that's the one
how very dare you

come to sunny st h and get away from the scary golfers,eh?

[pgwithnumber3]

My brain is shite at the best of times but when pg, well...

My dad used to be a headteacher in St H, I have close family living there as well, place beginning with E?

[gigglewitch]

slick, good luck for tomorrow, just take it easy. will stick the thread on my watch list and just poke my head in sometimes (being in the not-pg minority)