Delay booking with NHS until 3rd trimester

[AlexandraN]

Hi all,

I am pregnant with #2 at the moment, should be about 6 weeks (my son is 4 m.o., this is a surprise pregnancy).

I work full time, back to the office when my son was 3 weeks. The job (financial, in the City) is challenging enough now even without the need to ask for time off for the antenatal visits and annoy the boss even more. Also, I must admit I saw absolutely no value added by the midwife appointments during my 1st pregnancy.

It may sound like heresy, but with the new pregnancy I am very tempted to delay booking with the midwife until halfway through my 3rd trimester. Educated enough not to drink, smoke or use street drugs during my pregnancy, not in the risk group for sickle cell disease etc., able to check my blood pressure with the home monitor, have a doppler at home so can check the baby's heartbeat whenever I like. Of course will do all the scans & bloodwork privately (at convenient time, without three-hour queues). Presumably, it will also help the NHS overstretched budget.

Am I missing something obvious with my decision?

[Jcb77]

Constructive dismissal? Probably the last thing you want to think about right now, but can you write any of it down whilst it's still fresh in your mind and ideally get a witness or two to do the same, keep emails etc.
Bigoted, racist, misogynistic people as your boss seems to be should have no place in power. And should be dealt with appropriately. Heaven forbid the next (white, British, male?) he employs turns out to be gay - I can't imagine terribly nice comments would be made then either. What I mean is that his attitude is very unlikely to be specifically about you and is much more likely to be about him. So for your sake and those that have the pleasure of working with him in the future - it needs 'addressing'.

[ChasedByBees]

So sorry OP, do you have any legal options? Unfair dismissal?

[Bornin1984]

Op that's disgusting behaviour from your employers! I hope
You see a solicitor about the unfair treatment you receive

[Jcb77]

That's very brave of you Alexandra. I hope that it gives you the opportunity for you and your husband to enjoy this pregnancy and that, in time, it turns out to be the best thing you've ever done. I'm sure the future looks very uncertain at the moment (or at least not what you'd had in mind) but I hope it all comes good. From at least one British born and bred citizen, you are very welcome here. You sound as if you have a great work ethic and are an asset to the country. If your children inherit that from you, we should count ourselves lucky. Please, when you feel able, report your boss to the relevant authorities etc. His behaviour is totally unacceptable, even is your take the female and/or pregnant bit out of it. Good luck.

[eggeggduck]

Given your history of eclampsia, NICE guidelines would be to be under consultant led care. You need to be having extra scans and taking aspirin etc. I would pay for the full service privately if nhs waiting times are a problem and you can afford it. As I'm sure you are aware, eclampsia can be fatal for you and your baby.

[AlexandraN]

Thanks so much all for replying and taking interest in my case.
Unfortunately, the whole discussion is no longer relevant as I handed in my notice yesterday myself. My boss did something that I just cannot accept or tolerate. He informed me that the company will withdraw the work permit sponsorship immediately, not allowing me to serve 6 months notice period I have in my contract (I checked with a solicitor before - employer in the UK can do it without dismissing the employee, and such "dismissals" are not subject to the labour or discrimination law), but I just don't care anymore.

I do not want to create a wrong impression about coming on a short-term contract visa and getting pregnant straight away to take advantage of the moment. I am in the UK for nearly 10 years - Masters, PhD, then five years with the same company, with 60-70 hours working week and not a single sick day off, even during pregnancy. Paid non EU fees for the uni, paid tax and never claimed a penny from the public funds. Never used NHS apart from the pregnancy and delivery. Happily married to a British citizen for a couple of years, own a house. It seems I am still not good enough to reproduce.

[Jcb77]

Nope, but you might well be entitled to maternity allowance if you've not worked the 26 weeks required, so long as you are employed and have been for a certain amount of time over the last year (I think), which it sounds as if OP has been.
15 weeks work then 6 months off? Yup. Then however many years productive work. No different from 10 years work, 6 months off. Try taking the longer view?

[TheScience]

You have to have worked for the employer 26 weeks by the 15th week before your due date to qualify for SMP - eg. working for the same employer since before you were pregnant. You won't get SMP if you switch jobs while pregnant.

[Roshbegosh]

Well that will go down well, work 15 weeks and then 6 months off.

[SandwichBag]

Having now read the whole thread, I think you should try and get a new job and soon. Qualification for statuatory maternity pay is 15 weeks prior to expected delivery, so as long as you started your new job by the time you are 25 weeks pregnant, you will at least be entitled to ordinary maternity leave (6 months) and your job back when you return. You do not have to tell your prospective employer you are pregnant and from what you've said, I think you'd have a very good case for getting your current employer to waive any extended notice period (check your contract though).

Working in the UK on a visa should not disadvantage you in any way. We employ lots of foreign nationals at my Bank and they are given the same benefits regardless of their resident status.

[PenguinsEatSpinach]

Sorry, that last bit wasn't very clear. What I meant when I referred to an unpopular comment is that that strategy probably requires a fairly short maternity leave. It takes a very forward thinking City employer with a vacancy to recruit someone who doesn't start for 12 months....

[PenguinsEatSpinach]

Alexandra - I've known people like this in the City. Thing is, there aren't many of them and they are a dying breed of misogynistic dinosaur. As soon as you possibly can after you have residency, get your arse to a recruitment consultant. You don't have to put up with this shit.

Also, and this may not be a popular comment, but it's the brutal reality, bear in mind that City employers are used to people having at least three months of garden leave before they can join a new employer. And restrictive covenants. If you get some legal advice and have the balls, you may have options that get you out of your covenants and lined up with a new job before you even have the baby (if you plan on taking another short-ish leave). An hour with a specialist employment and immigration lawyer would be money well spent I would have though. Make sure it's someone with immigration expertise as well as employment though.

[Jcb77]

Roshbegosh - the kind of person (and you come damn close to including yourself in that category) who expresses his or herself in such a fashion as the boss has is unlikely to limit themselves to pregnant (or otherwise) foreign women. There is no excuse for the kind of behaviour the boss has displayed. We are all part of some minority or another and will all have special needs or requirements at some point in our working lives. OP has already pointed out that she has UK qualifications, has worked here for a significant number of years and is presumably doing a job that this country benefits from. And pays tax. Quite a bit of it I imagine. To suggest (her boss AND you) that she should in some way forfeit the protection given to her and her unborn child in her current situation is inappropriate at best. Yes, I'm sure she is aware of the situation - hence the post. That does not however make her overall situation and the way it is being managed any more appropriate or acceptable.
Alexandra - I feel for you. I can understand that rocking the boat in terms of taking appropriate medical leave now on the NHS or taking your boss to some kind of hearing (which he damn well deserves) would potentially make matters very difficult for you. Please get some proper legal advice though - maybe through citizens' advice if you have no other contacts. You do not have a low risk pregnancy and putting yourself or your unborn at risk without need could result in a lifetime of problems. All of which your unspeakably vile boss could find appropriate slang terms for.
Once you get residency please do what is necessary to prevent the evil prick doing this to anyone else. It is all about him and not about your situation. The situation is difficult but his manner is entirely unacceptable.

[SandwichBag]

"Booking time off work will unfortunately will result in the job loss, I was already warned about this last time, do not want to take the risk. And have no holiday left to use - took all holiday for the maternity leave last December. Job loss is something I simply cannot afford now (pathetic I know)."

Why are you still there? OR are you not working in the UK?

I work in the City in one of the largest American Banks. They cannot be more accomodative and have an established maternity package in place. I am allowed to return after 3 weeks (if I want to) but get paid full time for 14 so why would I? I'm planning on taking the full 12 months off and have had nothing but support from my Manager and HR.

[YuccanLiederHorticulture]

what an utter shit your boss is.

Use private care to 30 weeks then the day after you qualify for indefinite leave to remain hand in your notice. Then book into NHS.

Don't try to DIY it though.

[MsIngaFewmarbles]

BTW if you book late into your pregnancy without a reason such as moving areas and having been booked previously with a different MW then the MW will need to generate a referral to SS. I have no idea if this would matter to you or not.

[MsIngaFewmarbles]

How about an independent MW who could still give you all the care you need and would be more able to fit in with your schedule?

Re home dopplers, I have an issue with them as it is unlikely you would be able to tell the difference between the baby's heartbeat and the placental pulsing.

Entirely up to you but perhaps given your small gap between babies it would be prudent to have some sort of maternity care. Also, with 2nd babies you have far fewer standard appointments than with a first.

[NurseyWursey]

Roshbegosh What a shitty attitude to have. She has rights just as any other person, whether she's from abroad or is a 'high paying high pressure job'.

He could have employed a man..
Yes but thankfully people are employed based on merits, not their gender. The latter would be sexist and has no place in today's society.

[Roshbegosh]

A tribunal won't be good on the CV will it?

Let's be honest here, you came on some kind of temporary work visa, had a baby and got pregnant again right away and are waiting for the forthcoming right to remain. He could have employed a man and probably will do next time.

When you come from another country on a short term contract into a high paying high pressure job you know what the deal is.

Of course you need to look after your pregnancy whether NHS or private, your choice.

[HarderToKidnap]

Your boss sounds like a cunt.

Anyway, please don't do this!! You have a very high risk pregnancy. You need regular special blood tests, uterine dopplers, repeat scans, monitoring blah blah and all the rest. You need significant consultant input. Go private or tough it out with cunt boss. Obstetricians work privately and do antenatal care outside working hours, pretty much all hospitals will have obs that offer their services privately too. You can then go NHS for birth.

My hospital does some booking in appointments on a weekend, too. If that's an option then you could book in, then go and have AN care privately until you can revert to the NHS.

[Patchwork88]

I am so shocked by what your boss has said to you...he is basically harrassing you on every protected characteristic that you have, gender, pregnancy, race.
If you don't have HR then you should contact ACAS who should be able to help and/or an employment lawyer.
Definitely keep a record of everything he does and ask others for evidence too if you feel able. ACAS will be able to advise you of any correct procedures you can follow to maximise your poaition should you want to take them to employment tribunal...if this was me, I would!

[Brugmansia]

I agree you need to get some proper specialist legal advice on your situation.

[MummytoMog]

I would not book in either, just do my scans and tests privately. As a low risk pregnancy you would only rarely have appointments anyway, private scans are very reasonable, a good private midwife would be able to organise tests for you and check the baby at appropriate times and I can't see what else you'd miss out on. Then book in once your residency was sorted.

[mummytime]

The expensive bit of going private for a pregnancy is the birth (because that is the riskiest and when Doctors are most likely to get sued). The rest should be far more reasonable.

I would also suggest you get some proper legal advice re the visa and your companies ability to rescind their sponsorship. Is the company part of a multi-national? Do you have a HR function? Your boss sounds like a shit.