Baby question new mum to be and a we bit clueless

[SweetPea86]

Hi I'm not due till April with my first child.

I'm pretty clueless and one of the things I'm unsure of is sleeping arrangement with baby

Once I get home does the baby sleep in a Moses basket in our room and if so how long for?

And then how old is baby when they go in to nursery,

I know a few friends who let baby sleep in bed for 3 years which to me is a no no I want a good routine going.

My best friend had her little girl in her own room by 5 weeks and she slept right through for 12hr (a little angel lol )

Sorry for the daft question.

[BummyMummy77]

Too much quiet is not good for babies.
Watch tv. Hoover. You don't want them to be a fussy sleeper.

We're having ds in Moses basket when I'm awake and an arms reach co-sleeper (little cot that joins on to side of the bed so he's separate but I can just roll over and touch him) at night.

[HazleNutt]

DS is 4 months old, he didn't like the Moses basket and we have an open plan ground floor, so no need to move him around constantly. He sleeps his daytime naps downstairs with us, in Amby Hammock and will also sleep there in the evening, from 8-9 until I go to bed around 11-midnight. You can do everything - cook, eat, watch TV, he doesn't stir.

At night he sleeps in our room in a co-sleeper cot. www.amazon.de/FabiMax-Beistellbett-Babymax-Matratze-PROTECT/dp/B009WQFPJ4/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1383297805&sr=8-1&keywords=fabimax
Can't recommend it enough, you can grab the baby, feed without either of you waking up properly and just slide him back.

[SolomanDaisy]

God no, I'm a bit overprotective, not insane! I meant there was always someone in the room with him when he was asleep, which is because the SIDS guidelines are based on them regulating their breathing by yours. And I don't count loo breaks, going to get a sandwich etc., as they are so quick. He just used to stay in the living room with us until we went to bed, so it wasn't really disruptive.

[Hettyjones]

Soloman, do you mean that one of you stayed awake with your DS all night???

I really don't think you need to be watching them 24hours a day. It is fine to have a shower, make a cup of tea etc. really it is. Because doing that is no different to being asleep at night whilst they are, is it? I have never met anyone who watched their baby 24hours a day without sleep/tea/loo breaks. You do need to adapt but that's ridiculous.

Oh and honestly, the vast majority of women I know (including myself) had no clue whatsoever and most were just like me and winged it until we began to get the hang of things.

[SolomanDaisy]

For the first six months someone was with DS 24 hours a day. No-one went crazy! It was nice. But I was at the paranoid end of the parenting spectrum, as we had not found it easy having DS. Many, many people don't do it this way! I honestly think you don't know until you have the baby which way will be best for you. DS wasn't much of a crier and always had one good chunk of sleep a night, which meant I wasn't exhausted and in need of space, which I might have been if he'd had colic and cried six hours a night.

[Geneticsbunny]

highlove depends on the baby. Some will sleep through pretty much anything. It is very noisy in the womb so hey should be used to noise when they arrive.

[Brodicea]

I was thinking of swaddling her/him when newborn and then moving onto a grobag when a little older.

[badfurday]

Ah, Ok, I guess a lot of it is gut feel.
Katatonic - Me too, everyone else seems to just know what to do!

[Ditsydebs]

badfurday of course you can you do not need to be with your baby 24hours a day, you will go mad if you are!

[Ditsydebs]

My advice us go with your instinct, all babies are different. My first DS was in her own room at 5weeks because we were both light sleepers and kept each other awake. From that point on she slept from 11pm-7am. Midwifes differ on their opinion on whether to leave a baby to sleep or not and in my opinion if my baby was gaining weight I would leave them to sleep, they will wake when hungry! Whereas my 2nd DS was in my room until 3-4months as was still waking every four hours for a feed. Baby monitors are so good nowadays I don't think you need to have the baby in with you unless that's what you want. Baby number 3 is now on the way and I will just follow my instincts! Good luck x

[badfurday]

Yet another first time mum here, again due in April.
So just to clarify, I cant leave the baby asleep upstairs in cot/crib type thing and be downstairs, even with a baby monitor?
Oh god im going to be crap at this :-/

[moobaloo]

Heya! Another first timer who knows nowt here!

I love the idea of slings, but have no idea which ones are good?

Anyone tried this one?

www.mothercare.com/theBabaSling%C2%AE-Classic-5-Position-Baby-Sling---Lavender/495819,default,pd.html#q=newborn%20sling

[SolomanDaisy]

katatonic, yes it does mean that, but most people make the judgement that the risk is minimal and it's worth going to have a shower. You might have a baby who likes to sleep in a sling, in which case you can do lots of stuff while they're there with you.

[SolomanDaisy]

We used a special small grobag from birth, but it wasn't grobag brand. I think they recommend from 8 pounds for their smallest size. DS used to doze and feed on my lap while we watched TV. We had an amby hammock for him in our room, which was great. Another option is to get an Ikea cot and use it as a bedside sleeper. Then when you want to move them you can do it gradually by adding the side on etc.. I'm still cosleeping at two though! After he got too big for the hammock he couldn't get used to a cot.

I think it's very difficult to plan in advance though, as you don't know what you or your baby will like!

[waceystills]

Highlove - tv shouldn't wake a baby unless really loud. We carry on as normal when DS is with us in the evening - he's 6 weeks.

Even the dog barking doesn't make him flinch, but then he would have heard that noise whilst in my tummy

I'm sure all mums will agree, every baby is different and you do what ever works for you to ensure you all get some sleep. You'll find yourself trying things you thought you wouldn't (co-sleeping included) to get some precious sleep

Mumsnet really helps to get some idea of what to expect but as the thread indicates, what to expect can vary immensely.

[girliefriend]

I think I had a moses basket next to my bed that newborn dd went into at night, during the day she slept on me or in the pram. She moved into a cot when she looked too big in the moses basket!!

Around 8 weeks I started thinking about having a bedtime routine and gradually a daytime routine started to formulate around the 3 month mark. Its a gradual process and very much depends on what you need and what kind of baby you have!

My dd needed structure and routine and was a much happier baby when I put one in place (loosely based on Gina Fords contented baby book) I also felt more control and happier knowing what to expect roughly day to day.

Its horses for courses though

Oh and I swaddled dd for first couple of months and then she went into a gro bag.

[yellowsnownoteatwillyou]

Ds went in a gro bag from about 6 weeks. Asda £12, are really good.
I've just bought the next size up as he is very tall.

[vichill]

Grobags ok when over 8lb according to midwife. Smaller or premature babies will be ok with a couple of blankets providing they are no higher than their arm pits.

[yellowsnownoteatwillyou]

My ds is 3 months and during the day sleeps on a bean bag, and at night I had him in his pram top in the cot for about 1month then in his cot.
He has only started having a bed time in the last few weeks. And used to stay in the same room as us then go to bed when we did.
I think I will keep ds in our room till he's about 1, or when he can walk.
Don't stress about routines in the beginning, they find their own.
However I say this with a baby that sleeps 8pm till 6/7 am. But I know I'm very lucky.

[highlove]

Brilliant - honestly learn more here than from most of the (many) books I've got. Thanks.

[Hettyjones]

Just checked on the gro.co.uk site which doesn't mention anything about waiting until 3mths. Not that I can see. It's a good site for safe sleep advice and sleep advice in general. They sell the grobags from the gro-store.co.uk site.

[Hettyjones]

Does it say that on the grobag website? I've used then from birth for all if mine no problem. None of my HVs said anything either. The 0-6mths ones have underarm popper and some styles have different levels of shoulder poppers too so they are very snug around arms and neck so no way to wriggle out or under.
My understanding is that only actual grobags and not ones made by other companies are endorsed by Fsids. It is to do with the poppers and materials used. This was the case when my older ones were babies anyway. Also easier to transfer from Moses basket to cot if you chose Moses basket downstairs and cot upstairs option.
And yes, newborns are fine with tv as long as not too loud. However, try to have them facing away from lights. We found it better to sit in darkness or semidarkness to watch tv.