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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

Potty training upset 3 year old

59 replies

SnowWhite26 · 07/11/2018 22:41

Mt 3 yr old asked to go in knickers and has done a few tiny wees on potty and gets a sticker. Tonight she hadnt gone for a big wee all day so was obviously uncomfortable. Put nappy on at night like normal and have just had her inconsably crying about needeing the potty. I got her up and changed her nappy which was soaking. Shes settled for now. Shall we give up with training for now? Shes obviously starting to understand what a wet nappy feels like but dont want her to be traumatized! Any ideas? X

OP posts:

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Gemmsybabe · 16/11/2018 13:29

Hi just reading your comments on here i have a son who has just turned 3 whos speech isnt very good (he was a cleft pallette baby so has set him back) so conversations are pretty much 1 sided. We've been potty training for 2 weeks and he still just isn't getting it. He will sit on potty when told and has done a wee but mainly because I've sat him there and waited a short while then made a massive fuss when he does (potty dance, treats etc) but he just doesn't get it i will put him on potty he will do nothing then get him up and wee 2 mins later on floor. He knows he has done it as he will look at me and I put him straight to potty when he does it but he just isn't getting it anyone any further advice or do I just hold off a little while longer? I'm slowly losing my mind here 😥

SnowWhite26 · 13/11/2018 20:24

She was getting so upset and worrying about it that i am taking her lead. She is tellimg me when she is doing a wee or poo in her nappy atm and then nxt step will be getting her on toliet. She is ready but it is still not worth all the upset. It gets us know where

OP posts:

Kokeshi123 · 13/11/2018 02:30

She is learning to do a new skill and is getting used to peeing in a different way to what she is used to. Feeling some stress and having some misses is not a sign that she is "OMG not ready", it is a sign that Rome is not built in a day and she needs a bit more practice and patience. At 3, she is capable of using the toilet/potty unless she has a disability, honestly.

Beamur · 12/11/2018 13:12

When DD was ready, it took no time and no tears. I was getting a bit nervous as she was due to start a nursery attached to a school in the Autumn and she couldn't go if still in nappies! Cracked it just in time.
I'd go back to nappies right now - for a few weeks maybe - and talk to your child about what's going to happen. Go shopping for new underpants - I resorted also to bribery, DD also got a new scooter out of using the potty!

SnowWhite26 · 12/11/2018 12:17

Beamur. Thanks for your response. I think i Will do the same. We are just going backwards. X

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Beamur · 11/11/2018 22:10

I tried to potty train my DD at a similar age. She was very clever but just not ready. Lots of stress, lots of tears. I put her back in nappies and just left it a couple of months.
We had a breakthrough one day as I was running a bath, she obviously needed a wee (sound of water was a clincher) but the nappy was off. I ignored the fact that she was widdling on the floor (she was trying very hard not to) and breezily suggested she sit on the toilet. She used the toilet and was pretty much dry after that. No. 2's took another 6 months though. She was very very reluctant to come out of nappies!

SnowWhite26 · 11/11/2018 22:00

So still tears as holding it in and now she wants a nappy on to do business but is telling me.If i refuse she just gets so upset :( dunno whether i might give up for a couple days and just not mention it.

OP posts:

SnowWhite26 · 10/11/2018 23:49

Thankyou all those that are saying it doesn't matter about age.she is just 3 but has a head full of imagination and games and is obviously finding this potty training tricky :(

OP posts:

Kab30 · 10/11/2018 23:47

Oh my Lord..can we stop saying she's three she shouldn't be in nappies!!!!! It's all up to the individual..everyone takes different times....xxx it will come when she's ready ....x
My lo is 3 in January and he's still in nappies and is gradually being inquisitive about the toilet and potty etc ..I'm not pressuring him ...little steps big smiles x

SnowWhite26 · 10/11/2018 23:16

She hsd her bath this evening and got up immediately saying she needed to get out. I think she did a little bit of we abd it freaked her and this was followed by a whole half an hour of been desperate byt not letting go. Then i put her in a nappy in the end as it was bed time

OP posts:

Robots1Humans0 · 10/11/2018 22:53

Would she stand up in the bath (empty obviously) knickers off and do a wee?

MrsA2015 · 10/11/2018 21:32

The people saying”she’s 3 no more nappies” need to fuck off

SnowWhite26 · 10/11/2018 21:29

We have a song. She just fets so desperate its almost like she cant stay on the toliet and doesn't no what to do with herself. We are in tomorrow. Pre school Monday though. So i shouldnt give up and try another time?She asked to keep her knickers on to do a wee earlier x

OP posts:

MadeForThis · 10/11/2018 20:55

Ignore all the people telling you about age.

You are training now. That's al that's relevant.

We stayed home for 5 days. Very hard. Especially in bad weather. But makes it a lot easier. Invite people over.

No pull ups except at night. Chocolate buttons for every wee that makes it into the toilet. Wear clothes so they understand that messes mean clean up time away from toys.

If she's really resisting wee's, have you tried a pull up but sitting on the toilet, then gradually opening pull up so the nappy sensation is gone.

Have fun on the toilet. Songs, bubbles, toys. We had a wee wee song and a dance. Sounds ridiculous but it can work. Take the stress away. No pressure.

SnowWhite26 · 10/11/2018 20:10

Another day of going to the loo with a sing and no wees and 3 lots of emotional upsets when she was desperate and didnt no what to do with herself. She pooedon her knicjy and didnt tell me and only wee'd when desperate and couldnt hold it :( i dont no what to do she gets so upset!

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Robots1Humans0 · 10/11/2018 09:40

Definitely get her on the loo when she's not desperate to go and get her to relax into it. The discomfort from holding in a wee will tense her up even more so maybe an hour or so after she's done one. Maybe when baby is asleep or chilling in a bouncer nearby. Get the bubbles out, reward sweeties or whatever at hand, maybe a pirate Pete book or similar toilet book, videos on YouTube or whatever to try and distract her from what she's doing and chill her out. Get her bare bum if you can, and once she will do a wee bare bum, then put knickers on, then build up to clothes.

Move2WY · 10/11/2018 09:11

Don’t put a nappy on at all during day because she will get confused. Leave her in knickers and if she has an accident don’t criticise just clean her up and tell her to ask for the toilet/potty next time.

I see people are still hung up on age. Everyone needs to say it to themselves and stop writing itnout. Its not helpful for goodness sake

Sal1977 · 10/11/2018 08:41

How about putting the open nappy on the potty and getting her to go 'on' it? Show her that it's the same thing?

Try not to stress, you don't want her to end up having issues around going to the loo!

Good luck!

SnowWhite26 · 10/11/2018 03:14

Thankyou so much for all the useful advice
I think she will get ot once shes done a proper wee. I stick her on the potty or loo regularly but after 5 hrs of holding it in thats when shd gets upset and i give into a nappy as i dont want her to hate the toliet. Should i not put the nappy on and just let her cry and make her sit on the loo? She had a poo and wee accident at a friend's house on wed after insisting she wore knickers there and was ok about it but coz shes quite a thinker i font think she wants that to happen again and is worried X

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RemoveAllPicturesOfRon · 09/11/2018 23:42

My DD has a bit of general developmental delay, and I only potty trained her at 3.5. She held it in for AGES on the first day, but the thing that worked (and still works) for us was an exaggerated “listening for the wee wee”. DD thought it was hilarious, relaxed, listened herself and out it came! She was pretty much sorted in less than a week after that. Good luck!

Robots1Humans0 · 09/11/2018 23:34

It's all well and good looking down your nose at those of us who haven't potty trained by their second birthday or before, but the OP came on here looking for advice not criticism. Toilet training is not a race, there are no prizes for first place. Same for the rest of children's milestones. Give your heads a wobble , and if you still can't support OP then kindly leave 👋

Robots1Humans0 · 09/11/2018 23:30

Ps I also potty trained my eldest at 2.5 and youngest at 10 weeks, it's a juggling act ! Plenty of clean clothes and coffee!

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Robots1Humans0 · 09/11/2018 23:29

She sounds like she is tensing up on the potty. I've heard of giving kids bubbles to blow while on the potty to help them relax to do a poop, may also work for a wee! She will get there

Sal1977 · 09/11/2018 23:24

Meh.

I'm 41yrs old and have no idea when I was toilet trained. I've done alright.

Mrsfrumble · 09/11/2018 23:18

I agree that it’s not helpful to suggest it should have been done earlier.

Why not stop it then, eh?

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