June mummies '05 thread 12 - the one where they aren't babies anymore!

[katzg]

new thread!

Enjoy!

Congrats Jonah

[katzg]

new thread number 13!

[katzg]

ok time for a new thread i think!

muma- glad to here that your ex is considering this, although very sad for your dd

[sfxmum]

hi all

hi mumma - what a lot to deal with. i am very sorry for your dd poor kid, i know that adults might see that she is better off but really all she feels is tha her dad does not love her. at least she has you and i am sure you will be there to make her feel wanted and loved.
i lost my mum to cancer when i was 15 but the feeling of loss was very different than that i felt for my father, who was never much of a father and whom i have not seen for over 20yrs. i was older and knew i had to cut contact but a part of me always longs for love and approval, never happens but hey human nature.

sorry about the long post, hope your grand father has left too.

hope everyone else is ok too

[tribpot]

Wow, muma - what a lot of news! First of all, hope your grandad will be departing shortly, it sounds like you could use a break.

So sorry to hear about dd1's dad. Even after everything it must be really horrible for her to hear the news, even though I know you'll be there and do everything you can to support her. What's the process of adopting, is it like a 'normal' Social Services adoption? I have to warn you, this is a really difficult process to cope with.

Hopefully when you've seen a solicitor you will have all the info you need - my heart just breaks for your precious dd1.

[muma3]

right ladies ,
have i got news for you

before i start i hope that you are all well . i have so much to say and if i comment on all of your posts then i ill take over all of MN .

so here goes.

my grandad has had genetic bowel cancer for over 15 years. he phones me last tuesday to ask of he can come and stay for a while as he has hurt his leg. he came over last wednesday. he lives in walthamstow . i live in northampton. i told him would come to him but he insisted . he has been here ver sionce. you are going to think this sounds horrible but it all in his head . his keg is fine. he has been back and forward to the shops and if he thinks im not looking he walks just fine. he has messed my toilet and is smoking in livingroom with out opening window, i open it he closing it saying it is cold. im dreading when he goes hopefully friday as everything will be yellow. he only eats meat and boiled potatoes and cauliflower. so cooked dinner every night . i dont do cooking at the best of thimes but every night !! i dont see dp as he is out til 7.30 pm . by then every thing is done and im shattered. he moans constantly about everything i do and say . i am at the end of my teher but scared it might be the last time i see him too .

anyway on a lighter note....

dd1 dad phoned me tonight . havent got a clue where it came from but any one that knows what i have been going through will know that dd1 hasnt seen her dad since last JAN , her nan took her with out telling me abpout 2 months ago for a evening but that is all the contact she has had . he is a drunk and i hated it when she went . SHE decided she didnt want to go anymore and i supported that . i told him that he could come here and see her and phone when ever but we heard nothing.

he told me tonight that he didnt want anything to do with her and that he was happy to sign the paper work for my dp to adopt her . i am over the moon . i know that it will be abug shaock for her but i know that this is the best thing he has done for her since she was born.
we have been living on egg shells not knowing what will happen next but now we do . he has admitted that he doesnt want to know her any more and wants us both out of his life for good . he has another baby due soon with his new gf . he has a son already so this will be baby no. 2. he didnt make the full payments for csa at the beginning of the year and now has to pay the arrears back . he hasnt been meeting them . i think it has alot to do with money and having a new baby coming . but mosy of all he can tbe bothered to ake any effort for her .

i dont care , i got rejected as a child by my mother and i know how she will feel . i had noone . she has me and i will support her how ever i can and make it as easy as possible for her to get over this.

she has known deep down that her dad didnt give a shit and now this will just prove that really.

i will leave saying anything to her untill i have been to see a solicitor and got the full info first. i need to know that it is for sure before i get excited . he may be saying it out of spite and then change his mind for all i know?

any way . dp wants to go on comp . i will check back tmw and have a proper chat and talk about something other then myself !!!!

really really hope you are all well and junie babies are doing well too

love to all and sorry i am so very selfish and always talk about me but i dont get a chance to talk unless somethingreally exciting has happened and then i forget to say hell to anyone or congrats or sorries etc

very very sorry

love you all
catch up soon promise xxxxxxx

[giddy1]

Message deleted

[muma3]

havent got long and i will catch up later I PROMISE

i have had the best news ever
dd1 dad has agreed to give up his rights to her and will sign paper work for dp to adopt

of for bottle of wine , tell all later

love to all !!!!!

[tribpot]

I'm sure it wasn't the choc cake, katz, ds didn't get to eat much what with mummy scoffing it all.

Def meeting in someone's home is much more relaxing, chez trib is available for the next one, perhaps mid-Jan or similar?

[katzg]

oh trib - i hope its not the yummy choccy cake setting him off - if so i'm so sorry!

it was lovely to see everybody on sunday and we must do it again, it was much more relaxed (well for me at least) to be somewhere where it didn't matter what the DC's were up to.

[sfxmum]

blessed doom-sayer grannies!
mine will no doubt attribute every single tear and tantrum as well as every food refusal and night waking to the fact that i still breastfeed.
apparently we must be careful we don't turn her into a proper little madam whatever that means.

i hope it is not a food intolerance

[tribpot]

Sigh. Ds' tummy bad again, think the last bout may have set up the wheat intolerance, MIL will be pleased as she has been predicting it since he was born.

He's also managed to wreck a plug socket by yanking plug out yet another thing I will have to admit to the landlord. I bloody hate living in a rented house.

[sfxmum]

clever kids! we were trying to give dd her medicine today and she was running in the opposite direction saying 'oh whats that?' quite funny watching them trying to trick us

i think trying to get her way is just her being aware that she has a will of her own, some independence i guess, it is worth allowing appropriate choices to promote compliance when needed, at least that is the theory.

[Skyler]

Oh no not hitting at all. She is just not doing ANYTHING she is asked to. Actually she is deliberately disobeying. She was asked specifically to be careful with the sand and try not to get it on the floor and then turned her back and sneakily poured loads of sand on the floor. Blatant! . The nursery staff are fabulous and just telling me and asking what I do at home and how she behaves at home etc. It is a constant cycle of threats and rewards at home and we still get nothing done quickly, sigh.
Never mind. It will only be a phase. When she it good she is SOOOOOO wonderful and makes me laugh so much. I think she is a bright little thing, but she knows it......

[sfxmum]

mourinho - n and just how do you type the til on top?
is an arse just like every stupid arrogant mummy's boy portuguese boyfriend i ever had
(do you think i am biased and a tad sore?)excuse the bad languange and blantant racism
it's not that i thought you did not know but it is nice to see.
its been neRLY a week since i went to the RAH to see my compatriots singing, total treat and quite emotional too.
ENJOY YOUR TRIP


giddy- dd1 seems more settled 17 is a big girl, an hormonal big girl!

Skyler- negative reports? what she is hitting other kids? i am sure they all go through phases

[Skyler]

Aww Giddy bless your gorgeous dd's.
Trib - The keyworkers for dd are great. They have not worded anything negatively at all. I know what they are trying to say though . She is a nightmare at home at the mo too but has always been so good at nursery I think they are in shock. I say !!! Glad someone else is getting it in some ways.

[giddy1]

Message deleted

[giddy1]

Message deleted

[tribpot]

sfx, am slightly alarmed that you would think I did not know 'the luitos', am not a complete fool after all (Lua and Katz to remain silent on that subject). Had not spoken to said person in office about the difference between Portuguese José and Spanish José but will tackle that one tomorrow Is Mourinho Muriño Mu- god, no idea what he called, is he awful?

Sorry to hear about dd's cold. Am firmly of the view that children should be kept in test tubes til age 18,then it's their problem if they are sick constantly.

Sky - negative reports from nursery, surely they are your client and should be phrasing their reports accordingly! I do not report to my client "you are rubbish" I say "there are opportunities for us to understand better what we each wish to achieve".

[sfxmum]

trib-'and the luitos'.full marks for that!i know you know the language and all but still impressed football commentators always funny when pronouncing that Moourinho character name (just how awful is he?)

2happy - dd has taken to dancing around saying she is happy at the slightest hint of music

dd has nasty cold and cough so fun and games here

hope you all OK

[Skyler]

Hi all
dd1 DOES put herself on her naughty step!
She is REALLY testing us at the moment. I have had negative reports from the nursery too .
Oh well. dd2 is still a tinker but so funny with it.
Good Luck with your trip Trib. Enjoy.

[tribpot]

Hee hee 2Happy; imagine when they can put themselves on the naughty step and say "I absolve myself of all responsibility as I am on the naughty step already" (or words to that effect).

Katz - thank you so much for having us over on Sunday, you are truly the hostess with the mostest (cakes) and it was lovely to see the Katzgettes and the luitos. We popped in to see Mrs W and crew on the way home so had a full-on MN day, excellent. All the children were utterly adorable, but lil Miss Katz 1 was so sweet in trying to find toys in her playroom she felt would be suitable for ds. Like he really cares if he is presented with a Barbie or similar

lua - you will laugh, I had a most bizarre convo with someone at work today about whether people in Spain pronounce José 'Jo-THÉ'. He was adamant they did. I said (politely) "no they do not". He said "are you absolutely sure?" "I have a degree in Spanish. Yes. I am sure". Jo-thé, classic.

What fun with our tickets for Stockholm; I bought them online last night but had to do 'em separately as it was cheaper that way, but made the mistake of putting ds on the cheaper ticket. This has to be issued within 24 hours, and because it has a child on has to be a paper ticket. So we all had to slog over the airport (well, admittedly it's a 7 min drive) this evening. Would have been okay if I hadn't have been in back-to-back meetings all day (as I am tomorrow).

Dh's breathing machine is within current handbaggage sizes, good, so just need to arrange transport through Schiphol.

Giddy - happy birthday to dd1! Hope she had a nice day. Dd2 is hilarious, "hello boys". Imagine what you'll be going through when she is 17

Uki - lovely to hear from you and best of luck ttc. So sorry about your m/c.

tea - we must get our boys together again! Will be down south over the Xmas period, shall we compare diaries?

Sky - glad to hear I am not the only one who struggles to communicate with non-mums.

sfx - I think we should write a book about parenting, with the dedication "The only true wisdom consists of knowing you know nothing". "That's us, dude". (Bill and Ted reference of course)

Party on dudes!

[2Happy]

Gosh it's quiet on here at the moment! Just thought I'd share ds's new trick: he's learnt that we call him a monkey when he does something he shouldn't, so he now does everything we tell him not to, but while saying "monkey" over and over, like that makes it ok!! Lol.

[katzg]

hello all

was lovely to see trib and lua yesterday

[sfxmum]

LOL lucky he did not say meat is murder or fur is blood

my mother told me i used embarrassed her terribly, once calling the nuns 'reactionary fascists' and telling a woman who had just proudly announced she had 12 kids 'have you not heard of contraception?' then again possibly they should have refrained from expressing some political views until i knew better where to spout them

[tribpot]

ds pointed at a woman in the GP surgery last night with a fur-collared coat and shouted "cat". Fortunately as he says "am" for "cat" (am = meow) she was none the wiser.