Anyone found God/prayers but still reject organised religion?

[RoroNoa]

I feel lost. I feel empty. And sometimes there's something deep down in my chest that tells me to pray. To just cry and pray.

But I was brought up catholic in a school with creepy priests and mean nuns. Priests that preached doing the right thing whilst defrauding the school of money. Scandals etc.

And the whole bible thing doesn't sit right with me. It was written by men and I don't trust it or believe too much in there.

I don't like churches. I don't like judgement

But I feel like something is missing from my heart.

Can I ignore everything I was brought up with. Not have communion. Not have confession.

But just talk to God and try to do better in my life??

[RoroNoa]

I've spent the last 20 years proclaiming myself an atheist.

[heyhohello]

Keep praying and ask God to lead you. We all feel like this sometimes. There is much injustice and corruption within church organisations, sadly. Perhaps a different church might feel better for you. I attend an online church which does communion (not Roman Catholic) . Something like that might give the space you need away from judgment and power plays but provide the solace and comfort you seem to be seeking.

[dgirluk]

I'm following this with interest.

I was brought up to hate organised religion and to poo poo the idea of a deity. Always thought of myself as an atheist, can't reconcile the idea of any sort of God with my logical brain.

Then about 18 months ago whilst at the funeral of a friend (in a church) this incredible warm feeling suddenly spread across my body and I was overwhelmed. It still brings me to tears thinking about it.

And I'm not really sure what to do about it honestly! I think about it almost daily.

[RoroNoa]

I don't want to try a different church.

I'm talking about just private prayer.

Surely if there's a God he isn't confined to the walls of certain buildings?

I don't pray. I've not prayed in years.

[heyhohello]

@RoroNoa

I don't want to try a different church.

I'm talking about just private prayer.

Surely if there's a God he isn't confined to the walls of certain buildings?

I don't pray. I've not prayed in years.

Well then do that then, op. I'm sure God can reach you!🙂

[RoroNoa]

@dgirluk

I'm following this with interest.

I was brought up to hate organised religion and to poo poo the idea of a deity. Always thought of myself as an atheist, can't reconcile the idea of any sort of God with my logical brain.

Then about 18 months ago whilst at the funeral of a friend (in a church) this incredible warm feeling suddenly spread across my body and I was overwhelmed. It still brings me to tears thinking about it.

And I'm not really sure what to do about it honestly! I think about it almost daily.

This resonates so much.

It's so confusing isn't it.

I've scoffed so many times at religious people and felt sorry for them believing in such rubbish.

Why would a God leave people to suffer? Why would he give kids cancer?

It's making me angry now just thinking about it.

The church would say its part of his plan.

But I think 'maybe it's not. Maybe he doesn't control everything. Maybe he made the earth and is just leaving nature and people to it. He doesn't control it anymore but just watches to see what we do"

That sits much easier with me than him giving kids cancer. It's so confusing :(

[heyhohello]

And a definition of church is just a collection of Christians. It's the people not a building!

[Pantsuit]

I talk to god often but I’m not religious and never have been, I don’t attend a church either and I’m not actually sure if I believe there is a god, but there might be and speaking out loud how I’m feeling, what I need to work on and appreciating the things I have makes me feel better sometimes and if there is a god he knows I’m thankful, so there’s no downside.

[RoroNoa]

@heyhohello

And a definition of church is just a collection of Christians. It's the people not a building!

Yes and having been brought up around them, alot are not nice people who practice one thing whilst preaching another. And I don't want to be around that toxicity.

[RoroNoa]

@Pantsuit

I talk to god often but I’m not religious and never have been, I don’t attend a church either and I’m not actually sure if I believe there is a god, but there might be and speaking out loud how I’m feeling, what I need to work on and appreciating the things I have makes me feel better sometimes and if there is a god he knows I’m thankful, so there’s no downside.

That's actually lovely. Thankyou for sharing that.

[CheeseCakeSunflowers]

I would use the word agnostic to describe you. I think of this as a person who is open to the idea of there maybe being a God but not sure either way. I am a Christian who is a member of The church of England but this does not stop me questioning some of the church's thinking. I am interested in all faiths and personally think we are all following the same God but using different names and ways of doing it and that we can take ideas from all religions. I think its fine to find God or whatever word you want to use for God in the way that feels right for you. If that's when you're laid in the bath alone relaxing or singing in a crowded cathedral both are fine.

[MissKittyFantastico84]

I hear you OP. There are so many elements of organised religion that make me angry or just leave me feeling cold. Extremism, corruption, blind faith, homophobia, misogyny, righteousness... but this is all human foibles, when you really get into it.

But I do also feel something in my heart that is higher and ultimately well meaning. I've not shared this with anyone, but I've found my guiding force in looking to my now sadly passed grandparents. They were both committed Christians, and wonderful people, and I believe that if anyone is looking out for me, it's them.

I know they aren't deities, but they are angels I can comfortably believe it.

Ultimately, if it gives you peace, then that is your God. xxx

[dgirluk]

@RoroNoa

This resonates so much.

It's so confusing isn't it.

I've scoffed so many times at religious people and felt sorry for them believing in such rubbish.

Why would a God leave people to suffer? Why would he give kids cancer?

It's making me angry now just thinking about it.

The church would say its part of his plan.

But I think 'maybe it's not. Maybe he doesn't control everything. Maybe he made the earth and is just leaving nature and people to it. He doesn't control it anymore but just watches to see what we do"

That sits much easier with me than him giving kids cancer. It's so confusing :(

It is!

I have wondered whether I should use this new uncertainty to do something good, but so far I haven't. I feel like it means something, but I don't know what.

I like your way of thinking about it.

[2in13]

I think this is more common than some people realise. Particularly among those who were brought up in a religious household and but no longer practice that religion.

You do whatever is comfortable for you OP. You can pray or talk to God without agreeing to organised religion. Whether it brings you comfort, companionship, happiness or hope is personal to you.

[cheekaa]

Being an agnostic, I pray to the powers of the Universe.

[LittleBoPeepHasLostHerShit]

I pray and talk to God and I feel that he listens. I read the Bible sometimes, but I don't believe everything in there, I don't go to church and I don't believe any other human can tell me how to be a Christian.

[WmFnKdSg1234]

@MissKittyFantastico84

I hear you OP. There are so many elements of organised religion that make me angry or just leave me feeling cold. Extremism, corruption, blind faith, homophobia, misogyny, righteousness... but this is all human foibles, when you really get into it.

But I do also feel something in my heart that is higher and ultimately well meaning. I've not shared this with anyone, but I've found my guiding force in looking to my now sadly passed grandparents. They were both committed Christians, and wonderful people, and I believe that if anyone is looking out for me, it's them.

I know they aren't deities, but they are angels I can comfortably believe it.

Ultimately, if it gives you peace, then that is your God. xxx

Your post brought tears to my eyes. Your grand parents sound lovely. X

[Sorciere1]

@RoroNoa
I feel for you. Have you considered Quaker spirituality; pacifism and no clergy. Or Buddhism doesn't believe in a creator god or try Stoicism; the ancient Stoics believed in a World Soul.
I'm a polytheist and believe the entire cosmos is the Divine Mother. There are lots of ways to explore spirituality, various philosophies without joining anything . So much is available now.

[RoroNoa]

@Sorciere1

@RoroNoa
I feel for you. Have you considered Quaker spirituality; pacifism and no clergy. Or Buddhism doesn't believe in a creator god or try Stoicism; the ancient Stoics believed in a World Soul.
I'm a polytheist and believe the entire cosmos is the Divine Mother. There are lots of ways to explore spirituality, various philosophies without joining anything . So much is available now.

I don't feel like I wnat to put a name to it though. I don't want to be a 'xyz' and live by the constraints and rules of an individual religion.

I don't like organised religions, I believe it cause alot more harm than good.

[Authorinwaiting]

@RoroNoa I could have written your post. I grew up with a strict catholic mother and needed up in a terrible marriage because she told me it was the right thing to do. 20 yrs later I can see it's because of her organised religious beliefs and wanting to do what looks right for her church people. They have always come before us and our needs.

I see very little good in organised religion and I'm not sure I believe in God in the mainstream sense.
Yet.......I came across the popes Lenten message. It's beautiful (not enough to reconcile me to Catholicism) I wish there was more of this.

[Freysimo]

@dgirluk

I'm following this with interest.

I was brought up to hate organised religion and to poo poo the idea of a deity. Always thought of myself as an atheist, can't reconcile the idea of any sort of God with my logical brain.

Then about 18 months ago whilst at the funeral of a friend (in a church) this incredible warm feeling suddenly spread across my body and I was overwhelmed. It still brings me to tears thinking about it.

And I'm not really sure what to do about it honestly! I think about it almost daily.

This happened to a friend of mine at his father's funeral. He hadn't been particularly religious before but went on to be a Church of England priest. He was a lovely man, sadly gone now. I wish I could have a similar experience.

[Happyinarcon]

There’s a lot of Christian things on YouTube that I watch depending on my need. I would like to go to church for the fellowship but early morning services are difficult for me. I read a lot of Christian books.

I also read the Bible, there’s so much wisdom in the stories that I would never have picked up on before. Many people I find are getting a religious tap on the shoulder at the moment. Your prayers will guide you. I never understood what that meant before but it’s true, pray and a way forward will emerge.

[Buttheywereonlysatellites51]

I was brought up Catholic, but left the church many years ago. I gave up organised religion and was agnostic for a few years before I realised that I didn't need a church or religion. That there would always be something about every religion that didn't resonate with me.

I started reading about many different beliefs and built up my own belief system. I think the concept of God is too big for any religion to even begin to understand. I would start talking to God, you don't need religion for that.

[Authorinwaiting]

@Buttheywereonlysatellites51 love your story. Could you recommend any texts to start with?

[Lampzade]

I believe in God and pray regularly but I don’t attend church.