My name is Undervalued...and I'm a pedant (sob)

[undervalued]

Imagine it pedants..... you're going on a hen night (fair enough, you can cope) Bride to be turns up with t-shirts to wear - one for day and one for night! (WTF???) You manage to keep smile on your face. Then you notice:
a) wrong spelling, your name now ends with a y, not an -ie!
b) On the back, in gold lettering (), are the words - 'Blah's hen's'
Feel my pain please. I am a farkin English teacher. Is wearing this T-shirt unprofessional? Will I be fired?

[undervalued]

I don't think anyone EVER needs a clatty man ScottishMummy Well, not for too long....

[ScottishMummy]

fortunately i was already winching so never needed a Clatty's man

[undervalued]

Oh, the carpet - I remember it well!!! The men just scared me shitless....I was only 19...x

[ScottishMummy]

ClattyPats aye done some mad bevvying there Thursday student night.recall the sticky carpet and sticky men

know west end VVWell - love it

[undervalued]

In the West End ScottishMummy?? I remember going to a place called Clatty's many, many years ago. [grin}

[undervalued]

[undervalued]

AARRGGGGGGG!!!! where were you last weekend Midnight??? The 'people' I went with were very rude about the Glaswegian accent, claiming not to understand a word!! My ma and pa are from Glasgow, so I had no issues...

It's a week later and I am still shuddering at some of the things that went on.

Should I seek professional help?? Am a just an old fuddy duddy?? Am I on the wrong thread???

[ScottishMummy]

send 'em round hyndland (my gaff)

[ScottishMummy]

no one will notice spelling error.just all the gallus lassies face it hen nights look like a troupe of numpties - no wonder you were ned magnet's

did clitty claire go to clatty pat's

[midnightexpress]

Damn. Got all excited when you said it was in Glasgow (where I live) and now I discover it was last weekend. You could have come round to mine. I would never let a rogue apostrophe under my roof. You would have been safe here.

It sounds like hell.

Clitty Claire. Oh god.

[undervalued]

Califrau - Hen had a flashing L plate too.
One girl had a t-shirt with the words - Clitty Claire on.....

It attracted all the nobs in Glasgow - as was expected.

This bride to be was 38 FFS. I expect this of young 'uns.
By the way, she blamed the hen's on the printer...excellent!!

I've decided that I am clearly too snobby to attend these events. I will have to live with the thought that I am so unsociable that I will soon live alone with a lot of cats and will smell of urine and Youth Dew.....

[thumbwitch]

You poor thing, it sounds truly horrific! I avoided a hen thing almost completely and ended up having a really traditional (old-fashioned) one the night before the wedding, when a few friends came over and we shared some fizz and had a laugh.

But I have been on several and lucky for me, none of them have been as bad as the one you had to suffer - the worst was probably at a Greek restaurant with the CBM bringing the usual hotchpotch of embarrassing crap; and I did go a few years ago to a weekend in Bournemouth (apparently the number 1 hotspot for hen weekends at the time) where our party was EXTREMELY sedate in comparison to some of the other horrors being perpetrated around us. Possibly the worst was a party staying at the same hotel as us who came down to breakfast in the same t-shirts they had been wearing the night before - regardless of their condition [bleugh!}

[arfishy]

That is so much worse than I could ever have imagined.

[offers bottle of wine to help numb the pain]

[Cies]

pmsl undervalued. I didn't think people went in for such high jinks at hen nights any more! Well done for surviving it

[undervalued]

Thanks arfishy. I hoped for the best really but it was a nightmare. Here are some.....
a pink cowboy hat
a willy straw
badges
a condom keyring
screaming women, armed with double entendres galore!!
we're having a gang bang singalong
tits and arses out the coach window
jumping on every poor man they could see.

The bride said, "oh what a shame you haven't got the teeshirts, you're going to feel very silly and left out...."
I did, but for very different reasons..

[arfishy]

Oh you poor thing. I'd hoped you'd be able to numb the worst of the horror with alcohol.

I've only ever been on two - one was in Rome and was actually ok (apart from the Bridezilla making me cut my holiday in Cyprus short and pay £2K to fly there of course ) and the second was the willy straw affair, that I spent being mortified and then left at 10pm because I couldn't cope any more.

Any particular horrors you want to share or is it all too raw?

[undervalued]

You lot were right, I should not have gone!!
It was far worse than I ever could have imagined. I have been home for 2 days and am stil having hideous flashbacks. I keep shouting out, "Oh God! And another thing that happened was...." It was like some cliched 1980's hen weekend.

[uberalice]

If that happened to me I'd have to miss the hen night. In fact, I think I'd be too upset to go to the wedding!

[arfishy]

How did it go? Was it truly hideous, or bearable after a couple of bottles of wine and a few vodkas?

[undervalued]

Check, arfishy. Wine bought already.

and gin


and vodka

and brandy

no mixers.......

[arfishy]

Oh God how awful [supresses hideous memory of being made to drink wine through a willy straw].

Definitely take a jacket and drink two huge glasses of wine before you go.

[undervalued]

cheers LLGE

[LongLiveGreenElizabeth]

och aye the noo, have a good time anyway!