Two year old and Teeth Brushing - HOW???

[Tallulah1978]

My 2 DS WILL NOT brush his teeth. When his first teeth appeared and for some time he was happy to have a little brush himself and let me do it almost properly, but now, at 2 years and 4 months, and since he was 22 months he wont let me near with a tooth brush.

His lovely white milk teeth are starting to look yellow with plaque, and as he's a boy who is fond of garlic......well.....

Any ideas of how to get him brushing again would be much appreciated....

[tibni]

ds (severe sensory dysfunction and ASD) has always struggled with teeth cleaning so we have tried every trick possible. He is 9 now and at our last dentist visit he said that ds has a "clean mouth" - we were so proud

It has been non negotiable in our house too. Toothpaste is his big issue as he gags at the sight, smell, taste of it and we have tried every brand going to try make it easier for him. But over the years he has slightly desensitised so he gags now but isn't actually sick.

For young children (ds has learning difficulities) time can be difficult to grasp. We use a count down method 10 - 0 with me controlling the speed so ds can see the end. I also give him a square of kitchen towel as he can not cope with spitting into the sink (sensory).

When ds was younger he would not have got stickers, rewards or punishments he just didn't have the understanding but numbers always made sense. He also has a large egg timer that can be used as a visual prompt.

Hnag on in there - you will get there, it is a battle worth fighting.

[potteringon]

This might sound trivial, but could you change the time/place when you brush his teeth, to try and break the habit of him refusing to let you brush them?

I used to brush DS's teeth during his evening bath and he hated it. I changed to brushing them very last thing, in his bedroom, just before I popped him into bed (after getting scared watching that Alder Hey programme!). He's not fussed about having his teeth brushed since.

[WingedVictory]

We have a step stool for the bathroom basin, which DS absolutely loves. He climbs up without its being time for Teeth Time, and begs for it! (this one from Ikea is v solid, and not too expensive, unlike the JJMB one we first bought - one is now in the bathroom while the other is by his window so he can peer out).

Because Teeth Time is so nice now, he will let me take the brush away (sometimes) and have a go at the areas missed by his chewing.

We use adult toothpaste, following an encounter with a toothbrushing advisor on a project at our local Surestart centre. I hope that the fluoride content (1400ppm compared to 1000ppm of baby toothpastes) makes up for his brushing technique deficiencies. He does swallow it, but what can you do??

The toothbrushing project person (I think it was a project of King's College London) said at this stage (DS was then about 18m, now 2), it is the habit which is important. I am hoping she is right!

[LadyThompson]

Mmm, well, my SIL who is a dentist (and has three young children of her own) says cleaning their teeth is so important, if force has to be used (judicially) so be it. She advises cleaning teeth when they come out of the bath and are wrapped in a towel so their arms are trapped by their sides. I realise that sounds a bit draconian but I'd rather that than fillings, decayed teeth or even extractions as my SIL has often seen.

[differentnameforthis]

snala, I have said what I did when my dd2 refused brushing!

Another option is to brush (wet brush, no toothpaste) when they are asleep.

[snala]

Different -
If games etc dont work should I just leave his teeth on those days then? Hope they don't go yellow with plaque?

Im sure early experiences of having teeth took out at the dentit/hospital would leave a much worse effect (and dental phobias) than mummy holding him to brush his teeth!

What would you do if your Dcs REFUSED teeth brushing?

[LoveBeingAHungParliament]

pmsl I was on my phone, I have asked for a little symbol to pop up when people post from their phone cause iphone comes up with some weird words sometimes

[thumbwitch]

um, I think your last line went a bit awry there, LoveBeing!

[LoveBeingAHungParliament]

Ok some some willcross over other advice. Dd has had a toothbrush to 'play' with at brushing her teeth for a long while. She brushes mine whilst I brushed hers. Singing a song can help although sometimes that results in a big noooo .

I now sit dd on the toilet seat and I am in front of her so can get a good look. Plenty of good girls and well dones, she loves the tooth paste and wants me to put more on the brush so I put half on to begin with and if she's let me have a good brush I will 'let' her have some more.

I have recenty made a big effort after watching the programme someone mentioned before, I sobbed my way through watching it.

Dd also really likes routine and washing her hands in the sink so we brush teeth first thhen have a wash and finally she can wash her hands ( she loves bubbles so will remember the mirror tip for the next rime she goes through it) watching me brush my teeth and her doingvthem for me really makes gerblaigh so I don't know if get sees you do your teeth.

[differentnameforthis]

ScreaminEagle, I love that! How inventive!

[differentnameforthis]

TW, that shocks me too, children this young do not have the dexterity to brush their own teeth, electric toothbrush or not! My dd1 is 6 & I still brush her teeth.

Your ds will be OK swallowing the toothpaste, as long as it is only a small amount used each time.

I am also shocked how many use force to brush teeth. You are giving them a bad message in relation to their teeth & this is what causes dental phobias in most people. First/early experiences are very important & can do damage!

I know the concern with children not brushing, being a dental nurse it is non negotiable in my house too. Luckily dd1 loved it...still does & would happily spend hours brushing (which isn't good in itself). Dd2 was not so happy.

I find that letting her have a play toothbrush helps. Not only is it good for teething (no teething ring I know gets all the way back for the molars) but it helps with sensation of the bristles etc.

I sit on the floor, cross legged, with their heads in my lap. The head tips slightly back so helps with the view & I pull silly faces! Dd1 is too old for that now, but she still likes it sometimes, when she sees dd2 doing it. Dd2 will now have her teeth brushed any time, day or night.

[thumbwitch]

Am impressed that some of you let your DC brush their own teeth at this age - DS is 2.6 but I still do his for him or they wouldn't get done properly at all! He gets to do it after me, while I do mine.

DS goes through fits and starts with it - at the moment he has 4 molars coming through so is loathing having it done because it's all a bit tender in there - I tell him it has to be done as the price he pays for having chocolate. No teeth brushing, no chocolate.
I am also evil mummy - when he opens his mouth to bawl in protest, in goes the brush. I sit on the loo seat, him between my legs side on, so I can see what I'm doing (mostly) and he can't escape. Headlocks have been employed at times as well.

I have horrible teeth, poor enamel partly the problem, so don't want DS to suffer as I did if I can avoid it (hence why I'm still doing the brushing for him, I guess).

The only thing that currently concerns me is that he insists on sucking the toothpaste off the brush and therefore swallows it all instead of spitting it out - hope that's not going to cause any problems.

[lilacclaire]

I might have social services chapping on my door after posting this, but here goes....

My ds was exactly the same, I ended up pinching his nose (gently) so he had to open his mouth to breath, then I let go once I had the brush in! Sheer desperation you understand.......

When I met dp he was horrified and said why don't you just tickle him and he'll open his mouth when he laughs.

[mooki]

I picked up a tip from here about asking what they have eaten today and describing as you are cleaning off specific foods.

These days she's much better (32 months) - I have to say 'knock knock' to get her to open her mouth (she always laughs).

[DilysPrice]

I agree that if you're utterly sure in your own mind that it's non-negotiable and you will use force if necessary then they will give in.
Unfortunately if you've already let it slip a bit it will be more difficult, so you need to signal a fresh start in some way.
Could you take him to a dentist for a firm chat directed to both of you, and then say "Well, now we know don't we, and we're going to do the right thing!" (that sounds a bit 1950's but there must be a better phrase out there).
DS lived in mortal terror of "Horrid painful black holes" in his teeth - to this day if he's reluctant I say "What happens if you don't brush your teeth?" and he says "HBH!" and gives in.

[choosyfloosy]

one thing that helped with ds at that time was for him to do a dinosaur roar ready for dinosaur brushing?

[snala]

We have good days and bad days with teeth brushing.

On the bad days I pin him down and get the job done, we tell ds the truth- that its better for mummy and daddy to brush them than the dentist taking them out.

Its non-negotiable in our house too. I would be mortified if he had yellow teeth or plaque.

Could your dentist have a stern word? or offer any advice

[whatname]

Talullah, mines the same, been like this for months. Tried all of the above. Only thing that has worked is when he saw his friend/cousin do it when staying over.
I actually pin him down, I won't give in. He struggles and cries but it lasts less than a minute. hoping he will come round soon, but no sign of it!

[domesticslattern]

Things which have helped are:

taking her to the shop to choose her own toothbrush and crocodile toothpaste
she "helps" me brush my teeth first, then has a go doing hers on her own, then I do hers for her.
she gets to choose a song which I sing while I brush her teeth. It is the only time I take requests!
We talk about how important it is, practise on dolly, take her to the dentist with us, read books where Lola is being a dentist etc. etc.- lots of waffling about teeth in our household and how it is "ouchy" if you don't brush them.

I think probably the most important though is that it is utterly inescapable as she knows that I never stop doing it however much she screams and cries. We went through a phase when I would have to get her in a headlock to do it, but now she is mostly OK with it even though it is clearly not her fave activity.

I remember someone else on MN saying that they would rather that they held their unhappy child down and made them cry than someone who didn't love their child (ie. a dentist) did it.

If you need spurring on, think of that awful programme about the Liverpool children's hospital where 2 year olds were having general anaesthetics to have all of their teeth removed and the mothers were all bawling their eyes out. Makes me redouble my efforts every time!

[WoofyWifey]

I'll have to have a look, might work (assuming she's not petrified of it)

[EdgarAllenPoll]

i brush mine with her. I let her muck about with the brush first, then tell her i am going to 'tickle'her teeth. a bit tense as she will try and bite my fingers if they get close enough...but i make an effort to tel her where i am going to brush next, and tell her how good she is.

if she's really tired even that doesn't work, and i stil get 'Noooooooooooo'

[AmeliaJaneAgain]

mamaduck, I'm with you, toothbrushing is non-negotiable in this house, either nicely with games and jokes and cuddles or not nicely, on my lap, one arm to hold him still and the other to brush, we only had to do it not nicely once... now he knows there's no point arguing he doesn't!

[GFatemybaby]

Seems OK - think it might have been for 36 months but honestly it's the less of all the other evils.

[WoofyWifey]

Electric toothbrush for a 2yo? My DD is very much little miss independant and won't let me help what so ever with brushing her teeth. I always assumed electric toothbrushes wouldn't be suitable at such a young age?