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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Parenting

Tell me about your age gaps with 3 children

38 replies

peppapighastakenovermylife · 26/10/2009 08:47

DH just turned around and said he was happy to have another baby if I still wanted another . I am now freaking out

We are trying to decide whether to have another one soon or wait until DS (3.4) and DD (13 months) are perhaps 5 and 3 or both in school.

What gaps have you got and what were the postives and difficulties. We are thinking that 3 together could be hard initially but great long term but it might be nice to have a bit of a 'break' and have a tiny one when they are in school.

I know every family is different but I would love to hear your experiences.

OP posts:

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busybutterfly · 31/10/2009 23:23

DS1 7.6
DS2 5.3
DD 17 months

Planned the first two and the third was a happy surprise! (Hence the gap!)

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gigglewitch · 31/10/2009 23:26

when dd was born, ds1 was four weeks off his 5th b'day and ds2 was a few weeks after his 2nd bday. fab ime.

gaps are obv almost 3yrs between the dses and 2yrs 2mo between ds2 and dd.

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gigglewitch · 31/10/2009 23:27

and same as natsmum

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toolly · 31/10/2009 23:34

Between DS1 and DD just under two years.Two and half years later and had DS2. Now they are 5, 3 and just coming up to one. Lovely but knackering!

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jennifersofia · 01/11/2009 00:43

8.5, 7 and 1.5. Works well for us, older dd's adore their baby sis, and they are old enough to do lots of things independently (dress themselves, bathe, etc) and also understand why I have to spend time looking after the baby (eg they know when I am putting the baby to bed they have to amuse themselves.)
Also I get to spend time alone with baby when older two are at school, which is lovely!
That said, the baby is still pretty young, and tends to just join in with whatever everyone else does, so I am not yet at the stage of trying to amuse a 10 year old and a 3 year old at the same time.

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Rosie29 · 01/11/2009 10:42

dd1 was 4.9 and dd2 was 2.10 when ds was born (now 8 months). As others have said I found 2 to 3 much easier and enjoyed it much more.
If we go for no.4 I will try to avoid the 22 month gap we had between dd1 and 2, I would prefer a smaller gap or around 3years (as with dd2 and ds)
HTH

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Sarahlou8 · 01/11/2009 19:35

Has anyone got a big gap between?

My Dc are 11 and 9 and I'm pg with a much longed for no3, but peoples responses have been so negative, with comments like, 'ooh, big gap' or 'you're starting all over again'

My children are so excited and can't wait to help out and I think it will be a rewarding and special time for us all.

Has anyone got a positive story? xx

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oooggs · 01/11/2009 19:39

I have 4 dcs but a set of twins so only 3 pregnancies

ds1 was 3.3 when dts arrived and ds1 was 5.1 and dts 21 mths when ds3 arrived.

So had 3 under 2 and now have 3 under 3. It is great and ds1 is still the hardest

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Plonker · 01/11/2009 19:45

My dd's were 7 and 4 when dd3 arrived.

There is 3.2yrs between #1 and #2, and 4.4yrs between #2 and #3.
I love the 3.2yr gap but feel that the other gap is a little big for our family - I wish I'd had them closer together.

Sarahlou - one of my best friends had her ds2 when her dd and ds1 were 11 and 8. It has been a fantastic gap for her! Her older dc's dote on their little brother and he has lots of little friends so certainly has missed out from a social point of view

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Fabster · 01/11/2009 19:49

Ours are 8.7, 6.3 and 4.4 years.

I think what made it hard for us were lots of changes in a short space of time. DS2 born, DS1 finishing playschool and then starting school all while DD was wanting to potty train and was still little.

3 is a lot but that is just our experience as we have had a lot of stress in the last few years.

I wouldn't have too long a gap. There comes a time where you don't want to go back to the strain of pregnancy and no sleep.

If I had had a smoother ride I would have liked my first 2 a lot closer together and then a little gap and maybe two more children.

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LadyOfTheFlowers · 01/11/2009 19:52

Ours are 4.4, 3.2 and 11m. DC4 will be born April '10.

I have found these gaps fine tbh. The first to being so close was hard work as DS1 was only 14m when DS2 was born so still a baby himself really, but they are easy together now and like to 'look after' DS3.

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bumpsoon · 02/11/2009 18:19

ds1 15
dd1 7
dc3 due dec

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Misspaella · 02/11/2009 21:23

22 months between DS1 and DD and now 2yr gap between DD and DS2. I do find the toddler yrs challenging and both times I have had a newborn to contend with BUT the transition from 2 to 3 so much better than 1 to 2.

Being PG was hard with 2 little ones but you just get on with it. I was so active in my last trimester I reckon that is why I had a great labour (if there is such a thing of course)

I have never really been out of baby mode so the sleepless nights and home full of nappies is not too much of a shock. DS1 is now at school f/t so that helps.

Good luck.