Pros & cons of babies close together?

[boundarybabe]

Sure this has been done before! Over the last couple of months I have gone from 'never again' to 'maybe at a push' to 'I wouldn't mind having another' to 'I want another one now!'.

I am really broody at the moment and even if I'm having a bad day with DS I still keep thinking I'd like another. The thing is Dh and I said we'd like a small gap - both of us have big age gaps in our families (5 years between Dh and his bro, 8 years between me and my sis), and we spent our childhoods fighting like cats and dogs. Of course it isn't always the case but we both feel our large age gaps caused feelings of resentment between us and our younger siblings and we simply didn't have any common ground until we were all adults. I'd much rather DS didn't remember being an only child and had a playmate who will (hopefully) enjoy similar activities. I'm also not the most baby-centred person (the older and more interactive DS gets the more I enjoy him) and I think I'd rather have a couple of difficult years and then reap the benefits of having two close together, rather than raise DS and then start again IYSWIM. DS is now over 6 months so this is becoming a reality - if we want a small gap we're going to have to get cracking in the next 6 months or so.

I'd love to hear from people who've got small gaps - whiat are the best/worst parts?

[MrsMuddle]

14 month gap here, both DS, one 14 and on 13. It was hell at firsy - nappies, nappies and more nappies, but it got so easy when they were both at school.

There are great practical reasons (they both go to scout camps together, they enjoy the same films at the cinema, they have friends in common) but the best thing is that they are genuinely best friends.

They have very different personalities - one is sporty and musical and the other is into books and consoles - but they genuinely enjoy each other's company.

It wasn't planned that way, but I'd highly recommend it as a gap.

[Maj1]

I have a 17mth gap between my two. DS2 didnt sleep as well as as DS1 so there were a lot of sleepless nights and going back to work was no joke. But it is so worth it to see how well they get along now. It just makes me feel like bursting when I hear one calling out for the other to play with or wake up first thing looking for the other wanting to kiss good morning. I am also the eldest of 6 (21 year gap from top to bottom) and have wonderful relationship with ones closer to me. I wanted the same for my two - friendship wise - I have no intention of carrying on for 21 years!

[MaggieVirgo]

Fluffypoms, had she? oh poor woman. PUts a different perspective on it. Ionly skim read the first and last posts.

[Fluffypoms]

Just to let you know Maggie. x
Thread now been moved from AIBU to Breavment.

[MaggieVirgo]

oh the poor girl. feel bad now. I didn't post on it thank God.

if you're a mum, you're always going to be a mum, even without your child.

thanks for letting me know.