everyone always says it gets easier and i was hanging on to that fact for dear life..

[nailpolish]

but people have started telling me it gets worse

or "the problems dont get any easier they just change"

if this is my life for the rest of it im a dead woman by 40

i have a 3 yr old and a 14 mth old, any one else the same/have the same gap???

[QueensSpeechEagle]

I'm sure it gets easier once they are out of nappies and you don't have to carry/remember all the extra bits abd bobs every time you leave the house.

I was saying to dh the other day how much I am looking forward to no more of this and not having to lug pushchairs in and out of the car.

And the 2-4 age is the worst imo.

[Dotthehalls]

ours are just turned 4 and 20 months, and life is getting easier - very slowly..! TBH I found ds1 at 3 was very very hard. Didn't like his baby brother, discovered whinging in a big way,and the odd tantrum thrown in for good measure - he was much easier at 2!! But now he's getting that bit older he's calming down and for most of the time he tolerates ds2 much better- we even get the odd glimpse (maybe once or twice a week) when they play together for a few minutes!

So I think over the next 6 - 12 months life will get easier for you - it just feels like such a long time to wait and get through... And then when the older one starts school (for us that's in September) it's bound to get better as there's one less to worry about for 6 hours of the day!

[Mog]

I really hope it does get easier. Mine are 4.5, 3 and 1.5 and it's the drudgery work I want to be rid of. the cleaning, wiping bottoms, the not being able to reason with them, them not understanding that you can't do three jobs at once. I'm sure it must get easier when everyone can get their own shoes on and they don't seem to need you constantly with them for entertainment.

[Bugsy2]

In fact Nailpolish, I would even go so far as to say I really enjoy spending time with them now. You can go out for a day, without worrying about feeds, naps, nappies etc. Sometimes, when we've had a lovely day together, I have to pinch myself to check I'm awake.
Hope that is inspiring!

[Tortington]

14 - til whenever they leave i reckon - am waiting for mine to leave!

[nailpolish]

thats good to hear bugsy xx

[Bugsy2]

nailpolish when mine were your age, I found it really tough. They are now 6 & 3.5 and it is sooooooooooooooo much easier. There is light at the end of the tunnel - hang in there.

[Feistybird]

Things are a hell of a lot easier at 5 and 3 than they ever were at 1 and 3. Honestly, it's easier and for me anyway, much more fun. Saw all the tantrums with DD1, so DD2 phases me less (still infuriates the hell, you understand, only less so).

Custy tells it like it is, so am dreading 14.

[nailpolish]

ah custy, full of wisdom

is 14 really the cut-off age? it must be the paper rounds

[blueshoes]

lol, custy, like your post

[Tortington]

babies are much harder. thats a fact in the custy book.

problems are always there. when they go to school the teacher could pick on the kid or fall asleep drunk in class, your kid might not be getting enough attention, may be bullied, may be the bully, etc etc. theres always problems. but at that point imo kids become enjoyable, have a sense of humour - say things immensley funny. tell you o f their day - give you compliments and the ultimate compliment of wanting to be you.


when they get to 14 thats when the shit hits the fan - so enjoy the inbetween bits. get some of your life and independance as a person back time to do some classes or get a job or if you have one change it. but to be your own person for a few years. until they turn into twatfaces at 14

[nailpolish]

and i think dd1 is turning into a mini-me

she tells dd2 off like i tell her (dd1) off

"DONT touch the oven"

"STAY AWAY from the blinds"

actions down to a t as well (pursed lips etc)

[OComeOliveFaithfOil]

YES! She snitches all the time and acts like she has been shot if dd2 pats her face.

They hate each other! Well dd1 hates dd2, always fighting.

Sigh.

[nailpolish]

olive, if your dd2 is naughty (like in this house grabs the window blinds and yanks hard) does your dd1 say "i dont do that im a big girl mummy" and wiggles her hips and smirks all chuffed, that shes telling on dd2

makes me larf

[OComeOliveFaithfOil]

Dd1 has started copying me and saying 'fergeddaboutit' at dd2 all the time when she is trying to eat playdoh/crayons/dolls etc etc.

[nailpolish]

in january dd1 starts at the playgroup 5 sessions a week

hurrah!

[nailpolish]

hmm, i could try it at the kitchen table, and put dd2 in her high chair...

[wewishyouaClaryChristmas]

NP I had a problem with dd when she was 2-3, I was cursing and saying "who'd have girls" (also have 2 boys) but now she is 4 and at school like MI's dd and totally wonderful.
What I'm saying is, everything is a phase and will pass. DD was a tantrum queen. Now ds2 is 2.5 he's asserting his independence as well but I know it will be fine....
take heart

[elliott]

yes I can relate to that. I only do crafty/drawing things at our dining table, and I sit one ds at each side so they can't reach each other It used to be really hard to do anything like that with them both but ds2 is just starting to be able to concentrate a bit more on his own things.

[nailpolish]

dd1 gets annoyed when she is trying to draw etc at her little table and dd2 runs over and grabs the crayons. so she just gives up!

[MistleToo]

I can confirm it does get better






when they leave home

they can still be a pain in the neck though

[MaryP0p1]

I have a 7(nearly 8) and a 3 year old (nearly 4) and they do change and in some ways it gets easier and other ways it gets harder. The problems change is all. I also find that one is angelic for a while the other one has horns and they hand the banton over occassionally.

The other thing to remember your 3 year old with be a nursery more soon and then at school so the time you actually spend with them both together will get smaller. Its a blessing in some ways but worries you in others.

[Hallgerda]

My children are 11, 6 and 8 -there's a gap of 20 months between the second and third. I wouldn't say I had no problems, but life has certainly got easier for me. After a while they go to school (unless you home-educate, but that's self-inflicted) which gives you some time off. The problems also become more interesting - for instance, you worry about how to help them to do well at school instead of spending your time mopping up messes.

[elliott]

but I do find it hard to think of ways to entertain them both without mayhem ensuing when we are home alone.
I've never taken both swimming without 2 adults - but I think in the next 6 months or so this might become possible.
I always find it easier just to bail out and go to the park.

[elliott]

mine are just 4 and just 2 and definitely getting easier at dealing with together - because ds2 is getting more verbal and generally more capable I think.
ds1 is in some ways becoming more challenging (!) but I am finding this offset by the huge developmental changes that seem to be going on -loads and loads more imaginative play, he's suddenly got into sitting and drawing quietly for ages, etc etc
Might be a different scenario with two boys though!