If you child has hurt another child at school, do you approach parents?

[breeze]

Just wandering really, as Ds when he was 4, hurt someone at school with a pair or scissors, it was totally innocent game, but I still seeked the girls mother out and spoke to her about it, had a chat and all was well.

DS is now 5 and started school in September, about 3 weeks ago the teacher called me in to say that this boy L had bitten my son (quite badly) she spoke to the boys parents about it, and nothing was ever said, then yesterday my son came home with 2 massive marks on his face where this same boy had hit him in the face with a skipping rope, it was seen by teachers and it was done or purpose, my sons only crime is that he is very friendly with a boy in his class who had been playing with L so obviously nose put out of joint.

I just wanted to know what other mothers do/expect in similar situations.

[Jimjams]

ROFL Chandra @ the parents realising their son had attacked yours

When ds1 was scratching I was terrified about being approached by another parent - ended up blubbing on the nursery managers shoulder about it- that's when she said that if I was approached to send them straight to her and she would put them straight.

[Caligula]

I think it depends on their age and how well you know the parents. I would be very hesitant to get involved in something which is imo a school matter; they know how to deal with it and me sticking my oar in might make things worse rather than better. But if I knew the parent(s) I would certainly mention it and apologise on my child's behalf.

[whymummy]

hi breeze
a few months ago a child hit my friend's little boy in the head while at school the next day the boy brought him a home made card with a drawing of a head with a big plaster on the forehead and the words "sorry i hit you when we was playing"lol,i thought it was really sweet

[ThomCat]

I think a card, like whymummy talks about, is a great idea, and if I was the parent of the child who'd been hit I'd really like the card idea. It ensures no bad feelings can be haboured and the child has had to sit down and make-up for not being very nice.

[Caligula]

Yes - it's a much better idea than parents getting involved imo. Makes the kids take responsibility for their own behaviour. But is solid proof that the parent who has encouraged the card making takes the issue seriously and is profering an olive branch.

I might use that one if DS decides to launch an all-out attack on one of his classmates!

[ThomCat]

I think the card idea should go in mumsnets top tips. I hope i never have to use it but if lottie ever hits another child I shall def go down the card route. Well done whymummy.

[breeze]

I think the card idea is lovely.

I would of been happy with some kind of acknowledgement, I did catch her last night looking at DS's face when I picked him up.

[kidstarebad]

my kid almost killed a kid in 4 grade and 5 grade