We started ds1 (2.8) at kindergarten (mornings incl lunch) on Mon. He loves it (has not been left yet, dh is settling him in, but there were tears when time to go home twice so far), we are happy with the place (ethos, activities, food etc.) and very happy with the staff. I have been coming to meet him and dh at the end of the morning, as after the settling-in period dh will be taking him in on the way to work and I'll be picking him up. This lunchtime I arrived just as his 'keyworker' (the woman settling him in) was finishing for the day, and as she left the work experience lad went to his pocket and got out a packet of cigarettes and gave her one. I looked a bit and the other staff asked me what was up. I explained and they said she certainly doesn't smoke when at work/in front of he children, but tbh I'm bothered about it being on her clothes/hair/breath and transferring to ds1. (Am not so bothered about work-exp lad as he won't be there forever and has less contact with the children). And if it does, will ds1 then pose a risk to ds2 (3.5mo)? Neither dh nor I have ever smelt smoke on her, despite having met her several times before starting ds1, and when we looked at the place we didn't ask as I think we assumed childcare workers don't smoke .
I am, if I say so myself, usually a sound and sensible type and not PFB-ish, but I have zero perspective on this issue as I am a rabid ex-smoker (smoked years and years ago, as a student, for 2 years and stopped very easily) and, especially recently, sick to the back teeth of dh and ds1 going to ILs and coming back smelling of smoke even though MIL doesn't smoke while they're there. I don't take ds2 there at all for that reason and don't allow her to hold him (I will when he's older and the SIDS risk has subsided), which is causing a bit of a family rift. Am I overestimating the risks of this situation? I just feel instinctively unhappy about it, although I have really clicked with this woman otherwise, and it seems ds1 has too. My very first impulse was to pull ds1 out, but I really don't want to upset or unsettle him unnecessarily, and he is enjoying it. dh isn't bothered, although he detests smoking. Should I be?
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Opinions please. ds1's kindergarten keyworker smokes. Should I be bothered?
22 replies
berolina · 09/01/2008 17:03
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FioFio ·
09/01/2008 17:13
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