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A thread for parents to ask nursery nurses questions they wouldn't ask in real life?

59 replies

Wishuponastar011 · 16/04/2014 20:57

Thought this would be a good idea because I'm sure there are some questions that you would like to know the answer to that you can't ask in real life!

OP posts:
Waggamamma · 16/04/2014 21:26

Do you have favourite children?

What things annoy you most about parents?

GoodnessIsThatTheTime · 16/04/2014 21:28

Would you childcare yourself.

Friedbrain · 16/04/2014 21:29


elvislives2012 · 16/04/2014 21:30

Do you play with the children all the time? Or do you get bored (and a bit irritated) by them?

misssmapp · 16/04/2014 21:32

What do you really think of parents who leave young babies in for long days? Would you choose that for your children?

Friedbrain · 16/04/2014 21:35

I worked in a nursery for 5 years..

I will try answer some questions for you..

obviously everyone feels different but these are what the people I worked with felt... (around 50 nursery workers)

Yes we feel sorry for babies who are in nursery long days but understand sometimes there are no other options

Yes we have our favourite children

As a whole someone who gets bored or irrated with children shouldn't be in childcare

We do not play with the children all of the time, there's paperwork and so much other stuff there is to do Angry

Friedbrain · 16/04/2014 21:37

Things that annoy nursery workers most:

(As.a whole, in my experience)

The parent that walks in 2 minutes before the nursery closes and wants a full blown conversation about there child

Wishuponastar011 · 17/04/2014 06:22

Yes we have favourite children, but keep it to ourselves!

Most annoying things about parents are when they expect the child's routine to stay the same when they start nursery to when they were at home.
Also agree that parents who pick up 2 minutes to when we finish who want a full blown handover, or late and argue about paying the late fee!

We don't play with children all the time, they have to learn to initiate their own play. And there is so much else we have to do throughout the day!

I wouldn't leave my child in a nursery, would choose a childminder every time!

OP posts:
GoodnessIsThatTheTime · 17/04/2014 07:23

I've heard that a lot from nursery workers....why would you choose a cm over nursery? Would you still do some pre school when bigger?

NannyPeach · 17/04/2014 07:30

I have heard that from nursery workers too, so chose to use childminder for my dc and the preschool nursery from age 3.

GoodnessIsThatTheTime · 17/04/2014 08:20

(Do cm conversely say use a nursery?!)
I'm curious to hear why a nursery nurse prefers a cm. I think I would too but curious to know what an actual childcare professional thinks as opposed to my ponderings!

NeverQuiteSure · 17/04/2014 08:28

Interesting thread. I hope it doesn't upset any parent who through sheer necessity have to rely on nursery care.

That said though, our ex nanny started off as a nursery worker. She always said she'd choose a CM over a nursery, an au pair over a CM for older children and a nanny over a CM/au pair for younger children.

She said children are very safe in nurseries, but that they are "cared for, but not always in a very caring way"

She was a big fan of early years (3+) education, but said she'd favour non profit making nursery provision (surestart, school nurseries) over private nurseries.

Friedbrain · 17/04/2014 10:38

I was a nursery nurse for 5 years..
I would say;

Nanny for under 3's....

Preschool care for over 3's...

rallytog1 · 17/04/2014 11:22

Interesting thread... wouldn't you say though that a good nursery is better than a mediocre nanny or childminder?

My 11mo dd is in nursery three days a week and absolutely loves it. We tried a childminder but she wasn't happy and seems far more comfortable in a bigger group. Is she unusual or is it likely to be a reflection on the quality of the different settings?

AGnu · 17/04/2014 11:30

I trained to work in a nursery or as a TA. I did 3 placements in children's centres & one in a reception class - one CC & the school were held up as standards of excellence in the area. I've never applied for a job in either but have done a little nannying.

I now plan to home-ed my children as a result of my experiences!

HappyTalking · 17/04/2014 13:14

rallytog I would think it may be to do with the quality of the settings.

I work in a nursery, i would choose a good nursery over a childminder but i do have high standards. I went to visit 6 nurseries with my sister for her DS before i found one i was completely happy with.

I do not play all day long, part of my job is to help children to learn how to initiate play themselves and to play alongside and then with other children.

I would never judge parents for sending their children, people have to work.

I wouldn't say i have favourites but there are always children who have that extra special bond with you.

blacksheep2014 · 17/04/2014 18:32

signed up just to follow this thread, been lurking for a few weeks lol. I've worked in nurseries for 7 years now and peoples experiences of group childcare fascinate me.

We have children who are extra special to us but the great thing about that is, in my experience, they are different kids for every one of the team so every child has a close bond with someone.

My pet hate is parents who ask us to support them with toilet training, provide very few or no changes of clothes at all and then put their kids back in nappies the second they are home.

We don't play all day but we certainly don't have time to get bored :-)

Molly1990 · 17/04/2014 19:55

I'm a former nursery nurse, now a nanny. Will answer some of the questions!

Do you have favourite children?
Yes but I never showed preference.

What things annoy you most about parents?
When parents send in children in their best clothes and say they can't get dirty, or when they say their children cannot sleep all day even though they really need to!

What do you really think of parents who leave young babies in for long days?
I feel bad for them. I often think if they saw how their babies were cared for they would take them out. I have done mainly supply work and I have seen some care which I really disagree with. Quite a few nursery nurses believe in the mantra that babies can be spoiled if you always pick them up when they cry, especially at the 1-2 age. I have seen children crying for cuddles for very long periods of time, and been told not to cuddle crying children myself because they have to learn 'independence'

Would you choose that for your children?
I would choose a nanny or a childminder. I would never use a nursery after doing supply in around 50 settings.

why would you choose a cm over nursery?
For the above reasons!

Friedbrain · 17/04/2014 20:40

You can have awful care in all situations...

Nanny, Cm, nursery.... Very much depends on the setting.

Solasum · 17/04/2014 20:53

So far I have felt weird giving bottles of expressed BM to my nursery nurses as they always seem a bit surprised I am bothering. Do you prefer dealing just with formula? (stupid Q I know)

Friedbrain · 17/04/2014 20:59

They should not be making you feel weird at all!!!!!

Your baby, your choice!

Knackeredmum13 · 17/04/2014 21:05

This thread is making me very nervous about leaving my baby in nursery when I go back to work.

TiggyKBE · 17/04/2014 21:11

Yes we do have favourite children, but we don't let it show. (By we I mean good staff. Bad staff may be different.)

Annoying things about parents? Ones that come in the last minute of nursery and then want to talk for 10 minutes. Parents with idiotic requests such as 'I want my child to call poo "solid bodily waste"' or the one the other day who's child was allergic to cherry tomatoes. Regular tomatoes were fine, it was just the cherry ones. Hmm. Or parents who want us to rearrange everything to fit in with their child. And the generally rude ones. And the unsuitable clothes. And the pervey ones.

Good staff play with the children and keep them busy all the time. Happy busy children are easier than bored ones after all. Bad staff tend to be lazy and ignore the children quite a bit. And yes there is a lot of other stuff to do. Paperwork, preparing activities, making the place look nice, cleaning, etc.

Nursery nurses tend to feel a bit sorry for babies left for a long time, but understand it's often necessary.

wouldn't you say though that a good nursery is better than a mediocre nanny or childminder? - Yes. Unfortunately there are very few good nurseries about. Maybe 20% are good. I'd prefer a great nursery and they account for less than 5% IMO. Most nurseries are crap, poor, or mediocre.

Nanny for under 3's....
Preschool care for over 3's...
- That seems to be the general consensus amongst nursery nurses.

TiggyKBE · 17/04/2014 21:17

Solasum Most children send in formula milk, so it's unusual in the not usual sense rather than unusual-weird. Plus, I have a suspicion that a lot of the 17 or 18 year old staff haven't really thought much about breastfeeding, and some might be a bit Hmm about 'body fluids' being passed over.

Bobsmyaunty · 18/04/2014 06:31

This is a really interesting thread.

I'd like to know how honest staff are if your baby / child snt settling in. E.g. Do they tell you how long and how many times they cried etc.

I'm just about to put my 1 year old DD in for 3 months, 1 day a week (the length of my work contract). I'd love to know if that's just not going to work / worth it for settling in.

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