I'm not diagnosed but over the last few years have realised that I probably have ASD and/or ADHD and/or CPTSD.
The biggest problem area for me has always been work. I'm late 40s and the absolute maximum I have managed to spend in one job is 18 months. I work really hard and I'm always told that the quality of my work is very good but I just end up leaving usually because of overwhelm. Although colleagues seem to be in the same boat in terms of workload and gripes they generally manage to get on with it all whereas I don't. I struggle with open plan offices and sensory overload, all the social stuff where I try my best to get on with people but seem to fail miserably, add in struggling to switch between tasks, getting bogged down and overthinking. The standard of my work is higher than my colleagues so I'm not worried about my ability I just can't churn out work regardless which seems to be the expectation of management team. You get the picture.
I contracted for quite a few years which worked much better as I could just step away as I needed to but obviously this wasn't so great for security or finances as I'm not a massively high earner. I'm just about to leave another job which was a step in a different direction a year or so ago because the induction and training has been no existence. It's just been a baptism of fire that hasn't really improved as the workload has increased.
I'm thinking that maybe I might be better if I work for myself but I'm just nervous really. I've lost a lot of confidence having had so many knocks over the years. I just feel like my face doesn't fit anywhere.
Does anyone have any advice or can tell me what might help? I feel I have been here a million times before!
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Anyone else unable to stick with a job?
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vagueandconfused · 24/02/2023 14:37
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