How do you work as a lone parent?

[Lafoosa]

I've been really struggling financially, we've been living on the poverty line for the last year. The food bank doesn't even give us enough to last more than a couple of days either.
My kids are 5, 4 and 23 months. My middle isn't old enough for school yet and can only get 15 hours childcare, my youngest child's birthday is after the cut off for childcare in April. Even in September when I can get 15 hours for the youngest and the middle is in school there's no availability in jobs that'll let me have evenings, weekends, and every holiday off. I'm not qualified to work in a school, and I've already checked dinner lady jobs (which pay pittance anyway), there's nothing available anywhere near me.

I don't have family to help with childcare, or friends, and the kids dad isn't in the picture. It just seems like the the entire system is rugged against anyone who has no support network. Even the financial team at the council just tell me to ask for financial help from family, as if everyone has family who can do that.
I'm slowly just getting into more debt with bills because I either pay them and we starve or I buy food.
I've started doing an access course so I can go to uni and qualify for a higher paid job. But that's still another 5 years down the line that I'll even be done with that course and an undergrad.

It's been so bad I've regularly had to not eat so there's enough left for the kids to eat still. And I've tried applying for all sorts of jobs, but there's just nothing. I'd already be using most of a paycheck on my youngest to go to nursery when I find I job, there's absolutely no way I could afford a out of term time childminder for my other two.

It's a horrible thing to say, but honestly sometimes I feel like my kids would stand a better chance if I killed myself and they went to my parents with the life insurance money they'd get from it. At least then they'd not be in poverty anymore.

[sleepwellifyoucan]

Have you looked into what universal credit you would be entitled to to cover childcare? They will usually cover up to 85% of your childcare bill.

[sleepwellifyoucan]

And please don't think your DC would be better off without you. I've been there, going without so they can have what they need, and parents they would be better off without don't do that.

[Lafoosa]

@sleepwellifyoucan
Because I've got 3 kids I'd still be £1000 a month short with childminder fees even with the 85% because they only cover up to a certain amount and it just doesn't cover enough to not swallow my entire paycheck even with getting it back, and finding a childminder that had space for all three of my kids was a nightmare enough just for the one day a week I do my access course, nevermind a full week out of term.

[lotsofquestions2]

I am a single mum of 4. I worked in a nursery term time only and was able to take my own children for free to any session I worked. I've also worked in a hall type softplay and taken my children with me, cleaned and helped a lady to do her shopping. The best paid was a nanny job where I took my own child. I have no formal childcare qualifications other than being a mum. Could you search for any work from home jobs? Or even just working part time would help and then you wouldn't reach the £1000 limit on childcare. I know it is a a struggle.

[Lafoosa]

@lotsofquestions2
How did you manage to land a childcare job with no qualifications? Everywhere around me is so adamant you have to at least have a level 3. I've looked after kids either through babysitting, raising my sister at 14 or having my own kids so have tons of actual life experience with kids. But that doesn't hold much chop in area area around me.

[Nonewclothes2024]

Could you train as a childminder? Not sure on the rules around numbers / ages etc.
Until all yours are at school ?

[lotsofquestions2]

I don't know, probably because I am very good at what I do. I was approached by the manager at my current job as she knew me. I have had two jobs in day nurseries now and now I work in a preschool. I do have experience of nannying also when I was pregnant with my son and for a bit after. I have also Nannied taking my two elder ones with me also (was a before and after school type job) so there is jobs out there that would work. Not happy with saying my exact location but within an hour of london. Where I live you can also do college for level 3 for one day a week and work the other days, lots of nurseries will pay you to do this and is how all my friends got into it. Have a look on childcare, sitters and local Facebook pages.