Flying if your kids have father's surname

[ILikePaperHats]

I'm flying with TUI with my boyfriend and 2 sons DS6 and DS12 in July and am a bit worried because I have a different surname to my kids (they have their father's surname). Will this cause any problems checking-in do you think? I can bring their birth certificates.

[StrictlyAFemaleFemale]

Ive been stopped both times I travelled without DH. Although the second time the customs woman looked at me, then the baby and back at me and said you're alright.

[BillieEilish]

O.K

[PumpkinP]

I'm just going to write my own letter, I doubt they will check it anyway

[MrsJoshNavidi]

We've taken our DCs cousin with us a few times. Different surname.
We've taken, and been asked to show, a letter of permission at passport control every time.

That's driving/ferry to France though, not flying.

[BillieEilish]

I'm so sorry, but with 4 DC's of 2,4 7 and 8, you will be asked to prove you are able to take them out the country. It's bloody unfair.

You could be abducting them. UK is part of the Hague Convention.

BC's are going to be minimum here.

[KittenVsBox]

You can also be stopped and questioned even if you have the same surname. I certainly have been questioned when travelling with the kids but not DH. Luckily he was in the airport. I travel with birth certs, a letter (not notified) and a copy of DHs passport now - and it's not been needed!! I used to fly a couple of times a year without DH - we lived abroad

Birth Cert is a good starting point. Letter and copy of other parents passport is even better, but not always possible.

[PumpkinP]

My ex doesn’t even have a passport..

no no phone number for him, children are 2,5,7 and 8 So with 4 I guess we will most likely Be stopped than if you have 1 or 2?

[ChilliMum]

If you are friendly enough with your ex get a letter giving you permission - you can find an example on the internet and copy it he will then just need to sign.

I travel a lot with my kids (without dh) as we live overseas and I have better holiday allowance. In all this time I have only ever been asked once and Dh was actually with me as he had dropped me at the airport but as I didn't have a letter, dh was forced to go back to the car and get his passport to prove who he was before giving verbal permission .

Since then I have always carried a photocopy of dh passport with the letter and included his phone number on the letter however, we have never been stopped since.

[BillieEilish]

Do you have his phone number Pumpkin?

How old are the DC's?

I think the younger they are the worse it is. (IMO)

You could easily write a note with your EX's phone number on it. They likely then, won't phone.

I agree the UK is most strict. I was comforting a granny, on the same flight from Spain, who was not allowed to bring her DGC's into the country (Bristol)

DD was asked who I was and also, in quick succession I was asked her birth date.
Luckily, we look similar.

In Marrakesch, she was whisked off with a Spanish speaker and questioned in a room. I could go on... but if you produce a BC (or photo of it) and a note... it stops anything more than a few questions.

[dementedpixie]

There is no rule about it needing to be notarised by a solicitor. Government website says:

A letter from the person with parental responsibility for the child is usually enough to show you’ve got permission to take them abroad.

You might be asked for the letter at a UK or foreign border, or if there’s a dispute about taking a child abroad. The letter should include the other person’s contact details and details about the trip.

It also helps if you’ve:

• evidence of your relationship with the child, eg a birth or adoption certificate

• a divorce or marriage certificate, if you are a single parent but your family name is different from the child’s

[PumpkinP]

I know my luck, I will be one of the ones that are stopped.
People do seem to think that because it hasn’t happened to them that it doesn’t happen but I have heard of people being stopped. I haven’t been abroad with mine yet though we have a holiday in September.

[BillieEilish]

Absolutely, yes. And I'm quite sick of arguing about it on here!

You need authority more and more and more these days.

But risk it if you want...

I have been stopped on every trip, since 2010.

[PumpkinP]

but is supposed to be notarised by a solicitor)

Really?! What if exes are absent like mine

[BillieEilish]

The customs will just phone him if in doubt. But this is not an ideal option, they will be very annoyed.

I have always needed proof and my DD questioned many times (in another room ) Or they may just question your DC's 'who is this person?' etc You may get asked for birth dates.

You'll deffo need something with you be it BC's, a letter, a note even (but is supposed to be notarised by a solicitor)

[kitk]

Surnames do matter a bit PPs. My ex can take DD anywhere with his girlfriend and nobody questions him as it looks like she's just travelling with her parents, whereas I always need permission when travelling with DD because our surnames are different

[OllyBJolly]

I do have the same name as DCs and was often stopped at immigration in US and Canada and challenged about whether I had permission. I had sole care and control (as it was called in Scotland at that time) and didn't require anyone's permission.

Anyway, I got XH to write a letter saying he'd given me permission and to call or email him if there were any queries. This letter was never verified/checked/notarised but seemed to satisfy the authorities.

It's a bit misleading of posters to assume that because they haven't been challenged, then no one else will. It's quite distressing, particularly after a long flight with two tired and hungry children. Once I was even taken to an interview room (this is before I had the letter). Awful.

[PumpkinP]

I am going to write my own letter from ex! He is absent and has been for 3 years, there’s no way I’m asking for his permission

[BookMeOnTheSudExpress]

Regina- same here. And truly bonkers when I took a group of students to UK from Italy and only had to produce permission for the one I'd given birth to, not the others!

Snop- I think a copy of your husband's death certificate is fine.

[pisspants]

My kids have a different surname to me but I cannot get permission from their father as he lives overseas himself and as he hasn't seen them in 3 years wouldnt know if they were home or on holiday! I am always questioned on the way in to the UK so travel with full birth certificates and have not had a problem with that.

[Ugzbugz]

I've been asked a few times to see DC birth certificate coming into the UK, never leaving or leaving another country or entering l. I just typed a letter myself once saying it was from DC dad, he would be fine with this though as we get on okay.

[Newtothis213]

Also sought legal advise over this, solicitor also said take BC with us

[ursuslemonade]

I have been asked every single time for the BC when coming back. For years.

[LemonFrenzy]

Just take a photo on your phone of the bc to be sure. It's good that they check to stop abductions. Worth getting legal advice for peace of mind. Citizens Advice might be able to help.

[snop]

Watching this with interest as dp recently passed away, can anyone tell me what happens in these circumstances when you are unable to obtain a letter of consent. Both kids have their dads name.

[Pieceofpurplesky]

Ask your ex to write a letter giving permission and have his contact details on.