I hope it's ok to post about this here.
Firstly I want to say I absolutely appreciate that I am in a very privileged position,and I don't underestimate that. I have struggled for money for what feels like forever, and I never thought it would be any different.
My partner passed away in September after a very short battle with kidney cancer. Today I received a payment of 3x his yearly salary from his employer as a death in service benefit. I should be relieved that it means I won't struggle for money for the next few years. I know I should. But I don't. I wanted to throw up when I saw the payment had gone in, even though I had been made aware it would do at some point. It feels like the biggest kick in the teeth. Like somehow that money will replace him, and I don't want it to. I don't want it, or to look at it. I know he can't come back. But I don't want money instead.
Can someone please tell me they understand?
I feel so bad for not feeling grateful for it, especially as without it I would be stuck on universal credit, as I have 2 DC, 1 with special needs, so my earning power as a single parent is very limited, and will be even more so when my DC leaves school.
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Life-limiting illness
Finances after dps death
8 replies
sparkellie · 09/01/2024 19:29
OP posts:
sparkellie ·
09/01/2024 20:45
Colinthedaxi · 09/01/2024 19:40
I do understand but as someone who had the dead partner and got absolutely nothing I hope you can use it to make your and your children's life a little easier in time.
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