Life after oxbridge

[littleslummygirl]

As the dust settles after a No this week.
Am thinking I was rather more invested in Cambridge than I admitted. Equally, feeling relieved that DD doesn’t have to aim for an A+ In any subject so a little bit of pressure off.
Question now is whether DD asks for feedback.
And what advice for those who are looking ahead for next year.
My thoughts at the moment are that she would have regretted not trying. It was important for her to try as she was definitely a bit left field as a candidate and working for it made her hugely up her game academically But wow, the highs and lows are a real rollercoaster.

[ofteninaspin]

At DC's school, no advice is given with regards to which Oxbridge college to apply. My DC each chose a college from a shortlist of six on the back of open day visits.
In DD's case, she was interviewed at her choice of college and one other, and was offered at a third (now second year Oxford). DS had two interviews and an offer at his chosen college.
Their school is low key about Oxbridge applications and equally low key about offers. They recognise that their sixth form cohort (of about 200) goes onto many different universities and that Oxbridge isn't the best place for every subject. They also support an increasing number who decide to apply to universities post results.
DD is enjoying her (STEM) course, college and Oxford but readily admits that it would be less intense at one of her other uni choices .

[Dearover]

There were some surprises in there and it goes to show that the outreach schemes some Colleges run in some areas & schools can reap rewards.

[oneteen]

Not sure whether you can read this but there was an article in the Telegraph very recently about schools and it showed which schools sent the most pupils to each college.

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2020/01/12/revealed-schools-send-highest-number-pupils-every-oxbridge-college/

[Dearover]

Dd's school has a list of colleges & subjects to try to minimise the risk of clashes. They try to avoid having a direct comparison between pupils from the same school & subject if they get as far as an interview. I think they may have intervened if they thought she was applying to a College where there was little hope of a place, but they realise that it's ultimately the student's decision where they would like to spend 3 or 4 years.

[sandybayley]

Oh and I've never seen a list of which colleges DS1's school has previously sent pupils to. I've seen the subjects but not the colleges. I don't think the school publishes such a list.

[sandybayley]

@Tilly66 - Sorry it's been a disappointment for your DS. DS1's school didn't guide him to any particular college but they did say they would dissuade pupils from applying to the same college for the same course (school had about 90 applying for Oxbridge).

As it turns out DS1 was reallocated from one Oxford college to another and also had an interview at a third. He got an offer from the one he was reallocated to.

I don't think you can lose out by applying to the 'wrong' college as both Oxford and Cambridge have processes to share candidates around. In DS1's case I think he applied to a very popular college and got moved elsewhere (randomly selected) to ensure candidates were evenly split between colleges. In his subject (Chemistry) the faculty plays a big part in selection).

[Tilly66]

One more question... have any of your schools given their students statistics on their school offers at Colleges for different subjects. For example, our son applied to Classics but his school don't give out details of how many offers they have had for Classics from different colleges at Oxford/Cambridge over the past years. Should schools give out this information so that their pupils can make informed choices?

[Tilly66]

Delurking here as my ds was turned down by Cambridge for a humanities subject. He seems fairly OK about it now though he said he naturally was disappointed having gone through the whole process. The one thing I have been mulling over is this... Did any of your schools suggest suitable Colleges to apply to. Is that something which many schools do? When I look at the stats I realised that he probably wasn't applying to the best College for his profile. I realise of course that theoretically they scoop up capable applicants from the pool etc etc but does anybody feel that choice of College can improve or worsen chances? Or that some Colleges tend to choose certain schools. Would be interested to hear anybody's thoughts on this...

[aibutohavethisusername]

Firm

[aibutohavethisusername]

How is everyone’s DC now after some time to reflect? DD seems to be happy now and is trying to decide on her form and insurance.

[littleslummygirl]

Yes, agree with that sentiment. What is good now from 30 odd years ago is that the admissions idea of who to accept is not based on school tie or parental background.
Only thing that bothers dd is post uni.
She’s been to two or her three offer holder days. First was a clear no. Back from insurance, which she really loves and thought the dept were fabulous. They all had individual chats with a tutor and a seminar.
But is wondering whether less prestigious uni means a huge amount later? She really likes idea of civil service fast stream so I guess it’s the sort of area where such things matter to recruiters? Or has that all gone?

[Letsgoforaskip]

Hello 😀 This is my first ever post on a public forum.
My DD was one of many who didn’t receive an offer on 14th. Her Sixth Form Principal sent her a letter which really helped her to feel better. He quoted a Cambridge Admissions Tutor who said,” We do our best to select fairly but we know that, despite our best efforts the selection process is fallible. We turn down candidates whose subsequent performance at other Universities and career achievements demonstrate that they are more talented and interesting people than a good few of the candidates we accept. Hence we hope you will not view the outcome as your failure; it may well be ours.”
Of course this doesn’t take anything away from those who have received offers - massive congratulations to all of you. However, those that didn’t should never be disheartened. You are all amazing and will shine wherever you go.

[Dearover]

With the best will in the world, it will always be difficult to recruit Comp Sci teaching staff when the cash and opportunities in the real world far outweigh a career in academia for most.

[SecretGuiltyPleasureLoveIsland]

This was us last year; you do get very invested in it. Tbh, in hindsight it was the best possible result and we're/she is genuinely pleased no offer was made as current university is a much better fit (and like PP said, everyone has Oxbridge type grades).

[DingDongMerrilyOnThigh]

Midlife - i would guess that oxford numbers for different subjects will re-equilibrate over time. The Cambridge CS numbers seem to be edging up, and as college sizes are pretty fixed something else must have correspondingly yielded a few places.

[MrKlaw]

knowing its not the end of the world is one thing. Persuading a teenager who has been building this up to be the most important decision of their life and who may have been smitten by a particular campus, is another thing. Mine gave all the external signs of not being that bothered, but as soon as he got his results and realised he'd missed Warwick by a hair, he was shellshocked and hard to talk to. We had to get him to call Bath in clearing which was damn lucky as their website didn't show any availability and he was dismissive of his chances.

I think its one of those things they'll look back on. Going to your dream university can be as good/bad as going to a second or third choice - its what you make of it, who you're sharing with etc. Its a crap shoot. But that doesn't help them right now, in the moment of 'failure' (in their eyes)

I don't have an answer. And I don't know if it helps to know others find it difficult too? Probably not :)

[littleslummygirl]

Gosh, some people get touchy. I'm not over-invested in any outcom. DD has done most visits herself, including interview. It's her future not mine.
I meant by my approach towards helping DD think through things and not to be dogged by thoughts of 'what if' in any way is to suggest that is a possible avenue towards reapplication if she decides she wants to try.
Her likely firm offer is from somewhere she really wants to go to. V different from Cambridge and required grades lower, but it's all swings and roundabouts.

[milliefiori]

Hi,
Good idea for a thread @littleslummygirl.

DT2 is over his initial disappointment. He only has one offer though, from KCL. His subject notoriously offers late.

He's said if LSE offers he'll happily take it. He was almost as excited by the prospect of LSE as Cambridge and he adores London. If they reject (quite possible, despite high predicted grades - his school has a very low success rate at LSE) then he'll probably do a gap year and try again for Cambridge if his results are strong enough, or take up the KCL offer if not.

Privately, I think he'd be happiest at KCL. He'd be comfortably on top of the workload, adore living in central London and he has the option of his second year at a US uni which is also a dream he's always had. But he is still very attached to the kudos of LSE or Cambridge. So if he went to KCL he might have a completely unfounded chip on his shoulder about not having made the grade. That would worry me. Like @Coleoptera's DS, he has rigid ideas about what constitutes success in life and is too hard on himself when he doesn't make what he thinks is the grade.

If he does a gap year, I want him to plan it and to get some good things from it: learning to drive (he's late summer born so hasn't even thought about that yet); starting a band and getting gigs (he's a very good rock/funk/jazz musician and I don't want him to just drop that) and maybe doing a summer school in NYC or Washington. The idea is that a gap year would be something that really excites him in itself, rather than being a limbo until he knows about Cambridge second attempt results.

[MrKlaw]

Oxbridge or not oxbridge - isn't this a similar thing for any DCs that got their heart set on University X from an open day, or chat with their friends, or whatever reason?

My DS was really down getting an offer from Warwick but missing the mark by one grade (AAA needed AAA*). He considered a gap year and retaking but eventually calmed down and now he's at Bath and seems happy.

There are tons of universities, and for any given subject more than enough top ones of a type that will suit any applicant. At such a young age its difficult to manage rejection especially if they're predicted to do well, but it really isn't the end of the world

[MidLifeCrisis007]

I'm genuinely surprised at how jumpy people are about this.

FWIW DS applied for a humanities subject. I have no axe to grind.

Given that Oxford seems intent on getting its student base to mirror society better, I really don't understand why they don't offer more places for Computer Science. I know lots of other places do. But that's no reason why Oxford shouldn't! It's not a funding issue. Oxford is embarrassed by its riches. And I have little doubt that commercial sponsorship would be forthcoming should they need/want it.

[Baaaahhhhh]

There are 3 times more places for classics than computer science. It's 2020 Well yes, at Oxford. But I think you will find that there are more computer science places at the many other institutions than for Classics. Follow the course, not the university. It is also a very contentious argument to sacrifice arts or humanities subjects for STEM. As others have pointed out, Humanities subsidises STEM, and do we really ALL our youngsters ONLY doing STEM subjects. How sad. I say this with two DD's passionate in their opposite fields of STEM and Humanities

[MarchingFrogs]

@Bezalelle, @goodbyestranger, I can assure you that the 'slur' on (the H bit of HYMS) was definitely not meant in earnest. I note that neither of you picked up on my inclusion of the ARU medical school / the city of Chelmsford, though?

I was merely pointing out to the pp that however much it may seem wrong that Oxford doesn't offer more places for Medicine, given the number of applicants, the way the system works vis à vis medical education / training, it really can't just say, 'ooh, look how popular we are, okay, let's offer to another 50 or so'.

[Tfgjiknfr]

Have decided my approach if DD does opt for another go is to work as if she had an offer for A+,A+, A+

It needs to be your daughters approach not yours 😉. She may have her own ideas.

[goodbyestranger]

Agree that that's not on.

[Bezalelle]

somewhere less prestigious - Hull

I hope you're being sarcastic because this is not on. No surprises this board is accused of snobbery.