Did you know that marriage certificates in England and Wales include a section for the names and occupations of the fathers of the bride and groom, but the names and occupations of their mothers are not allowed to be recorded?
In Scotland and Northern Ireland information about mothers is included. Civil Partnerships also recognise mothers, unlike same sex marriages, which mirror their heterosexual counterparts.
‘So what?’ I hear some corners of the internet cry – ‘haven't we got bigger fish to fry?’ But imagine you've brought up your child on your own – when the most important day of their life comes along you won't be legally acknowledged, and the absent father will be. And if you've raised a child together, imagine that only he is considered important enough to give his blessing to the union.
And it's about more than a hurtful snub - it's about the erasing of women from the civil and legal system of which marriage is a central part. We're writing women out of history, and it seems indicative of a society where decisions are made by men to suit men.
As a consequence of women being under-represented on every platform, it often takes a petition to get any progress. So, I set one up. I am campaigning for a change in the law so that those who want to can record information about their mothers, and more than 33,000 people have signed it so far.
They, like I, find it astonishing that a legal document in 2014 discriminates against women in this way, particularly when you consider that public bodies are supposed to be following the Equality Act regardless of cost. When the UK signed up to the global convention on the elimination of all forms of discrimination against women, it committed to: “incorporate the principle of equality of men and women in their legal system, abolish all discriminatory laws and adopt appropriate ones prohibiting discrimination against women.”
Many would argue it's astonishing that a couple should need any 'sign-off' from their parents at all, but at least if it's both parents it feels less like a transfer of property from father-of-the-bride to father-of-the-groom.
Supporters of the petition are young and old, women and men, and include lots of vicars and registrars. Younger people are astonished to learn about this inequality, and older people are amazed that nothing has changed since they got married. Family historians have pointed out the difficulties they have in tracing the maternal line without being able to find corroborating information from certificates.
One vicar said: "I'm tired of apologising for the sexism in marriage paperwork”, and a registrar commented: "I have been campaigning for this within my role for many years. It is a competition between bureaucracy and equality." Last week Caroline Criado-Perez, who was successful in her campaign to keep a woman on English bank notes, wrote that she will not be marrying her fiancé until equality wins out.
As with Caroline's campaign, this may seem like a little thing, but the visibility of women is essential in the fight for equality – we need to be seen as agents in our marriages, rather than just bit players. And in answer to the people who groan "not another petition" - I am proud to continue the feminist suffragette history of gathering signatures. It's just a little easier now - unlike our pioneering fore-sisters who won us the vote, I don't have to trudge around door to door due to change.org, Mumsnet and social media.
Because I'm already married, I'm going to add the information about my mother and mother-in-law to my original marriage certificate so that I can pass it on to my son and future generations will know who we are. The £9.25 for a duplicate copy (as I will invalidate the original with my pesky quest for acknowledgement!) isn't an enormous sum, but I shouldn't have to pay to right this wrong - they should have been included in the first place. If you agree, do sign and share the petition here.
Guest posts
Guest post: 'Why aren't mothers included on marriage certificates?'
MumsnetGuestPosts · 15/05/2014 12:17
I don't know the answer (& congratulations 
) but you may find an answer in this guide on the Government website.
Alternatively how about changing your name by deed poll before September if you want to decide which name is in the vows?
Update> 64,000 signatures at //www.change.org/nameequality and 78 MPs have signed the EDM at www.parliament.uk/edm/2014-15/27 - if you want your MP to sign then it is really easy to contact them via //www.theyworkforyou.com .
Gloria de Piero, Shadow Woman's Minister has written an article in the Telegraph today in support of this.
Please sign up and please encourage others to sign up.
At the moment the Home Office is trying to fob us off saying that it is complex and costly - event though they have said that they are still trying to work out what the costs are. 
JaneParker - many people signing the petition have said how hurtful it was to be left off this important document. I suggest you order a copy from the General Register office and add in your details and your DD's MIL's details and then you can keep this annotated copy for your family archives/to pass on to future generations.
I'm actually going to do this ON MY ORIGINAL - rendering it useless as a certificate but making it into a great document to pass on. Will have to get a certified copy of my own certificate before I do this.
Yes I've heard of other's who have received similar. Is it from a Tory 
- it's very disingenuous for them to allude to the fact that this campaign is won when it is not. 
The Home Office have barely moved from their position right back at the beginning. They say they are looking at it where as before they had no plans to look at it...there is absolutely no timeframe for how long this 'review' will take - it could be another 175 years (= number of years that certificates have existed in basically this format..)
Some one in Whitehall gave information to the Sunday Times saying that the Jenny Willott, Lib Dem Equalities Junior Minister was preparing to make this change. I understand that this is not the case at all - it is not her department's responsibility. The Home Office is in charge of the General Register Office and is the appropriate department to bring forth legislation to get this changed.
My MP, Steve Brine wrote to Sajid Javid the Equalities Minister several weeks ago and has not heard back from him as to whether he supports my campaign....
Gloria de Piero, Shadow Women's minister has written in favour in the Telegraph yesterday which is great! btw the comments under the article are 
She has written to Nicky Morgan, the Government Women's Minister. I will be interested to see if she gets a positive response!
The written answers (identical) to Caroline Lucas's and Gloria de Piero's questions can be seen here and here :
"The Home Office has indicated that it will not be possible to answer this question within the usual time period. An answer is being prepared and will be provided as soon as it is available."
Thanks for your support!
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Oh, this is kind of funny. Sorry, if my comment might sound off topic, but this article reminds me about that part of the Bible that lists the generations after Adam and Eve and all the names there are male. Like men reproduced on their own So childish and stupid.
Thank you Mumsnet for hosting my guest post and supporting the campaign and thank you to all the MNers who signed the petition.
Here is some media coverage:
Me on BBC South TV talking about winning the campaign www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-hampshire-28844124
Me being a bit giddy on BBC Radio Solent - www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p02493yy from 1 hour 36 minutes.
Me on BBC Radio Wales www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b04dq722 - from 1 hour 42 minutes.
www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-politics/11041636/Mothers-on-marriage-certificates-victory-Cameron-pledges-to-add-mothers-names.html
www.theguardian.com/society/2014/aug/18/mothers-names-marriage-registers-david-cameron
www.newstatesman.com/politics/2014/08/mothers-names-will-finally-be-added-uk-marriage-certificates
No timeframe yet so I will be on the case making sure this is implemented soon!
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