How do I know if my child is gifted?

[uhohgruffalo]

My DS has been speaking since about 10 mos. He is 23 mos old and he is now speaking in four- to five-word sentences, all the time. He can sing many songs, knows all the words. He tells jokes. He is memorizing Hop on Pop by Dr. Seuss.

I don't advertise this stuff to friends, and I've generally downplayed his abilities, believing that children develop first in those areas that interest them, and with DS it just happens to be language.

But I have started to get CONSTANT amazed comments from friends, family, neighbours, play group facilitators, strangers in lifts (!)... So now I'm starting to wonder if maybe he IS a bit gifted. And, if so, how should I handle it? Do I continue to downplay it, so he feels "normal"? Or is that harmful? Or is it even too early to know if he is gifted?? What do I do???

[Doodle2U]

My son could point to all the countries on the world map by the time he was two and a half - and I'm talking Iraq, Namibia and a whole host of others I don't even know myself.

He's now 7 and just bolloxed his SATS - so my advice would be.....assume he isn't unless he writes a concerto before his next birthday

[Quattrocento]

P=precious

[KaSo]

All 3 of mine could do that at that age, 1 is of 'above average intelligence', the other is clever and the third is normal to slightly below average for his age.
Progress at that age means very little.

[byebyebirdie]

What's a PFB? I worked out the FB -first born? Yes, he's my one and only, for now. Not sure what hte P is for

[Romy7]

oh. i did it again.
even cleverer

or were you talking to the op?
sorry!

[Romy7]

what mine? no - pfb even cleverer
ds is poor ignored middle child - that must be why he tries so hard, sob.
that and being sandwiched before the devil child was born...

[Quattrocento]

Your DS, a PFB by any chance?

[Romy7]

globaljen - nah - not unless he'd still be able to tell you how to spell everything lol?
i don't know that much about dyslexia really - his spelling tests are fine because he has no option but to sit and write one word when they say it (he went from 'did' to 'fluorescent' in one test lol - it did make me laugh and wonder whether the teacher was taking the p.)
i do think it's sort of because in his head he's already 'done' whatever it is - discussed it to the nth degree whilst planning with the class, so when they all move on to writing whatever it is down, he can't see the point. it's more a case of working out what motivates him really. but hadn't thought of there being any other reason for it, so thanks for the idea - i'll pay a bit more attention lol!
but he is good at bottomsitting!

[avenanap]

ds could count beads to 10 at 14 months, when he started school at 4 there were children who couldn't do this. Remember that all children are good at different things and no two are the same. Just because he's very good at language this doesn't mean that he'll be good at sport or music or maths. Try to encourage the things that he is not as good as aswell and make sure you leave more time for him to play and be a child.

[MrsMattie]

he sounds fab!

He's way too young for 'gifted' to mean anything, though, I think. Having him assessed would be pretty pointless at such a young age (don't think anyone would assess a child so young anyway).

My son is 3 yrs old and was an early talker. He now has an amazing vocabulary and people often mistake him for a much older child. His nursery want to have him assessed before he starts reception as they feel some sort of statement of his G&T-ness would benefit him at school. I'm not so sure, really. I don't see my son as 'gifted', I see him as...well...him. A unique little individual, like all children. I'd hate for him to be labelled or some how singled out so early on in his life, to be honest. Before you go down any route that labels him 'gifted' think about what you're doing it for, would be my advice. So much of the stimulating, engaging environment your child needs can be provided by you at this stage in his young life.

[globaljen]

Romy7... has he had a test for dyslexia? As several kids I have taught have been brilliant at verbal language, but struggled when trying to put their words on paper. My little sister spoke early, and now is doing a PhD but is severely dyslexic, she just needed help to work out what to put on paper, and found it intimidating to start with. There are ways and means, and levels of dyslexia..

[tigermeow]

Counting 7 objects at 23months is excellent. Quite a few kids that age can rote count to 7 but cannot assign the numbers to objects. He sounds a smart little boy. His singing shows that he has an excellent memory too.
Just follow his lead and give him a great all round childhood.

Don't worry what other people say. I tend to just say 'thank you'. Whatever you do, don't play down his 'skills' in front of him or say 'but he cant do xxx'.

[Romy7]

all our friends and neighbours called my ds 'golden wonderboy' from about 18 months because of his language skills.
at nursery, they asked the LEA to assess him as being gifted - the LEA told them to poke off - don't do it before school age, so they ran him with the yr r kids (i didn't know that tbh).
at 6, he is still ahead, but tbh schools will always differentiate as appropriate, and each child will develop at their own rate. i think because he started earlier the others are catching up now.
school are well aware of what he is capable of, but can barely get him to put pen to paper and he produces far less than anyone else in his group.
so we tell him he's the best at lazy bottomsitting.
which he probably is!

[uhohgruffalo]

sorry, I don't mean to sound like a ponce. It's just people saying things to me about him all the time that is getting to me, I guess. I'll drop it.

[Bink]

Yes, counting stones to 7 is within the normal range for 23 months (see thread on "counting to 14 at 18 months" - lots of anecdotes on there). Seems like the normal range is extremely wide at that age - as others have said, it tends to even up later.

[Hulababy]

Why do you want or need to know if he is gifted?

So long as he is happy and enjoying himself, that he is not being pushed beyond what he likes, that you are answering his questions and doing things with him that he likes, etc. then that is fibe - there is no need to have to compare what is normal and not normal.

For your DS this is his normal. Later on, some children will be ahead of him, some will be the same, others a bit further behind. And all of these stages will be normal.

Just enjoy him and have fun wth him

All children are good at something!

And G&T in schools is something very different again. It simply is a set %age in each school chosen as being the best iin their year at a given subjet/area. A child can be G&T in ne school, move to a new school and no longer be G&T as they are not on the top %age, etc. It means little as it stands at present.

[uhohgruffalo]

Thanks, everyone, for the advice. He can count now, too. I thought it was just reciting the numbers (we do the usual counting of stairs up and down, etc), but today I watched him, unprompted, take a handful of stones from a garden bed and count out seven of them. Is this at all normal for a 23 month old kid?

[cory]

And don't listen to ignorant well-meaning friends who tell you that such a gifted child is bound to grow up socially isolated! There is absolutely no proof that early development spells social incompetence. I have known two or three extremely early developers in my life and they have all grown up into delightful and very popular children. Just enjoy!

[Blandmum]

pain in the arse

[uhohgruffalo]

What's a PITA, Avenanap? (Assuming you don't mean flat bread!

[avenanap]

Ohh. Thanks .

[avenanap]

This is normal for him. Just carry on as you are doing and sit and talk to him as much as you can. Try not to get him assessed if you can, it can be overwhelming for a parent. Remember that he's just a child and should be playing and having fun. This is what childhood should be about. Alot of parents with bright children forcefeed them information. This is not fun for the child and could cause depression etc in later life. Go with your child. If he asks a question, answer it. If you can't, look it up together.

My ds was talking at 10 months and having conversations at 14 months (6 words at a time). He could read at 3 and a half. He's 9 now and has a reading age of 16 (the test only went up to 16, they did it at school) and a maths age of 14.

Try to avoid people calling him gifted or special if you can. The children often end up having problems relating to others that are 'beneith them' so to speak. It gives them the notion that they are different to everyone else and does make some of them a PITA.