Gymnastics abuse (TW; physical abuse of children, eating disorders)

[PermanentTemporary]

A Guardian link about the abusive culture in gymnastics, particularly 2008-2016, 75% of victims were girls. Horrible.

www.theguardian.com/sport/2022/jun/16/british-gymnastics-report-anne-whyte-review-uk-sport-gymnasts-abused

[sashh]

Have you watched 'Athlete A', it's about abuse in the US.

But similar abuse, beginning with Eastern European coaches bringing their training methods with them.

[jay55]

www.whytereview.org/assets/downloads/The-Whyte-Review-Final-Report-of-Anne-Whyte-QC.pdf

Link to the full Whyte review.
It's a tough read.

[parrotonmyshoulder]

I was a top school and county level gymnast in the 80s and 90s. All of this was going on at that level too. I thought I’d (mentally) moved on from it, but finding it impossible to talk about the current findings, so perhaps I haven’t.

[sashh]

@parrotonmyshoulder sorry you were treated that way and more sorry you are still suffering.

[Moj1t0]

It's awful, those poor girls. I seem to remember a discussion on MN quite some time ago (possibly even on this board, or one of its previous versions) suggesting that this kind of abusive behaviour was standard in ballet too.

[parrotonmyshoulder]

@sashh

@parrotonmyshoulder sorry you were treated that way and more sorry you are still suffering.

I didn’t think I was still suffering. But I read the report yesterday and my first thought was ‘yeah, and… that was normal’.
It isn’t ‘normal’, obviously. The disconnect between what I feel for those women, and what I feel for myself, is enormous. That’s a clear demonstration to me that I haven’t dealt with it!
I’ll speak to my counsellor.

[RoseAndRose]

I saw this on the news yesterday and find it utterly sickening.

The boys were abused too - not so much pressure on diet, but abusive training and continuing to force training even when injured.

It is utterly appalling, and what bothers me is how it went on for so long.

[CoastalWave]

I'm feeling really awful about it. My daughter only quit gymnastics recently. She is mentally damaged from gymnastics. She suffered awful abuse. She also witnessed awful abuse. We were at 4 different clubs in total over 6 years, so it wasn't one club - it's the culture. It's ingrown in the coaches. The ones who aren't like this basically sneak around and can't be themselves.

Worse - it's the culture that parents are basically groomed too. If you tell anyone or if anyone is mentioning this, they say things like 'oh no way would I let that happen to my daughter, no one would speak to her like that etc etc - but the reality is, they basically threatened that if you complained, you were off the squad and your gymnastics was over.

Age 5 my daughter was left stood on the high beam for 2 hours - because she hadn't got up the courage to do a cartwheel on there. She had tears streaming down her face. Not only did not one of the watching parents intervene, when I arrived I was then yelled at by the coach to say how disrespectful she had been and she was 'this close' to being kicked off the squad. I just accepted it. :(

Age 6 - she was stretched to the point where she was in physical pain - the coach was laughing at her.

Age 7 she was told (in front of a full room of gymnasts) that her lunch box was unacceptable and that she wasn't eating the diet of an elite athlete and she was a failure - she would definitely be too fat to swing around the bars.

I'm thinking of ringing the helpline they've put on just because both of us are still so mentally damaged from all of this. How did I allow it to continue?

[sashh]

@CoastalWave So sorry for you both.

I always wanted to do gymnastics but didn't get the chance, it sounds like I had a lucky escape.

What happened? Sport for children used to be about that, something children enjoyed.

In things like football you get teams at all levels. I know there can be pressure put on potential 'stars' but it seems like all gymnasts were treated like they were going to the Olympics.

The praise Kerry Strug got for vaulting on an injured ankle, well I think she deserved it, but she should not have had the option of making that second vault.

I don't suppose it is possible to tell how much damage was done on each vault and whether she could have competed in the other finals.

[grumpytoddler1]

I did gymnastics in the 90s, only at regional level. It was commonplace for kids to be weighed from age 5, to be stretched until they cried and for coaches to sit on then to stretch them, for kids to be left on equipment for hours until they plucked up the courage to do a skill, etc etc. I think we all just thought it was normal.

Not sure if anyone remembers Rebecca Owen? She was one of the top British gymnasts in the early 00s and medaled at the commonwealth games She sued her coach (Colin Still) about 15 years ago because he kept making her train on a back injury and left her with permanent damage. So this has been rife in the culture of the sport for a long time. The Stills are both still celebrated coaches, as far as I'm aware, and Christine Still still commentates on the BBC.

[BlackandBlueBird]

@Moj1t0

It's awful, those poor girls. I seem to remember a discussion on MN quite some time ago (possibly even on this board, or one of its previous versions) suggesting that this kind of abusive behaviour was standard in ballet too.

I know women in their 30s who were abused in ballet and swimming as children. I’m so sorry for those on this thread who have experienced it too. How terrifying it must have been.

My own DD does gymnastics and I was very aware when choosing a club for her that all this was in the background (albeit I didn’t know as much as I do now). So far I’ve seen no signs of any issues at her club - they almost go the opposite way in fact - but nonetheless they had all the parents at a meeting recently to explain that mental health was going to be prioritised more than ever so kids were going to largely be put into ‘easier’ comps and not be pressured to rack up new skills.

I presume they knew what was coming in the review and wonder whether other clubs will also take a similar track.

[GrazingSheep]

I have a cousin who at the age of 10 was in an elite gym squad. She was withdrawn when her father arrived to collect her early from a training session and heard the coach - a woman - calling her a ‘fat fuck’.
Complaints went unanswered.

[drpet49]

“but the reality is, they basically threatened that if you complained, you were off the squad and your gymnastics was over.”

^Yet parents still allowed their child to take part. I could and would never do that to my kid.

[Hellocatshome]

I remember doing gymnastics at infant school age. I hated it, cried on the way there, begged not to go etc. No parents were allowed to watch the training. We were shouted at, forced to do things that scared us, weighed, prodded and strerched and called fat and greedy. One day my DM was poorly do my DF came home from.work early to take me. Thats the last day I ever had to go to gymnastics. I dont know what happened/what conversation was had but I'm so grateful he saved me.

[Mariposista]

@parrotonmyshoulder

I was a top school and county level gymnast in the 80s and 90s. All of this was going on at that level too. I thought I’d (mentally) moved on from it, but finding it impossible to talk about the current findings, so perhaps I haven’t.

I am so so sorry for what you have been through. I am a competitive swimmer, and my coach is my no1 role model in life. He guides me not only physically in training but as a person too, and I consider him family. He would never allow anyone to train on an injury, or would adapt training so as not to make it worse, and understands the need for ample nutrition to perform well.
You should have had the same experience, someone to look up to rather than the horrendous abuse you have faced, and I am so so sorry.

[TeenPlusCat]

@drpet49

“but the reality is, they basically threatened that if you complained, you were off the squad and your gymnastics was over.”

^Yet parents still allowed their child to take part. I could and would never do that to my kid.

This is where the grooming comes in.
They tell parents it is needed and normal.
I think it is easy to say you wouldn't let it happen to your own kid, but I can see how if you have a keen child, and coaches are telling you it is necessary, it would be hard to push back and stand firm.

[BlusteryLake]

This seems to be endemic in all the "early realisation" sports, ie ones you reach Olympic level as a teenager because the children are so much younger when they reach elite level, therefore easier to manipulate. It's disgusting that these coaches put their own careers ahead of the wellbeing of these girls and boys and I am delighted they are getting their comeuppance.

[uggmum]

At my Son's club they would weigh the gymnasts.
If they thought they weighed too much they would make them wear a sauna suit and run around a track with it on.
They used to swear at them all the time too.
Parents were banned from the gym so we rarely saw it first hand.

[Papergirl1968]

I am a gymnastics fan and am disgusted but not surprised by the findings. But my dds did gymnastics when they were younger at recreational level, just an hour a week at the local leisure centre, with kids of all shapes and sizes, parents watching, and the coaches were genuinely lovely with no name calling, stretching, or being made to continue whIle injured. it was very clear it was a fun class and that they weren't looking to develop the kids into prospective elite gymnasts.
I hope this scandal won't mean parents stop their kids giving gymnastics a go if they want to, while remaining alert for signs of anything concerning.
Mine also did ballet, tap and cheerleading at various times, at local level and again with the emphasis on fun, and I had no concerns.

[Fizbosshoes]

@BlusteryLake

This seems to be endemic in all the "early realisation" sports, ie ones you reach Olympic level as a teenager because the children are so much younger when they reach elite level, therefore easier to manipulate. It's disgusting that these coaches put their own careers ahead of the wellbeing of these girls and boys and I am delighted they are getting their comeuppance.

Agree that it seems like grooming can start an age where children are potentially unaware of what abuse is and will automatically trust an adult in a position of power, even if they're older and realise it's not right, there is literally no one to tell if it's your coach.
I watched a programme maybe a year ago about abuse of teenage girls in a running/athletics club. Their coach used to to "massages" to allegedly help their muscles recover etc....which was obviously a cover for abuse. One of them blew the whistle (probably 10-15 years later) and it turned out nearly all her team mates had had the same experience, and one had since committed suicide. It is heartbreaking.

My son enjoys sports and as a parent it's something I really want to encourage for health, fitness, learning a skill, sportsmanship confidence and making friends, and as he grows up potentially an alternative path/distraction to getting into trouble (I know they're not mutually exclusive, BTW- you can be into sports and still try drugs/shoplift etc) And it's awful to think that sport which should be a positive experience for physical and mental health and enjoyment can be so corrupted (across so many disciplines and sports) .

[HappypusSadpus]

In the early 1990s I cried so much after one particularly horrific gymnastics lesson my Mum never took us back. The instructors used to stand on our pelvis to push them closer to the ground in stretching/warm-up exercises. I remember watching them physically sit on one young girl.

I knew that was wrong at the age of 5/6.

And that's why my child is never and will never be allowed to join the gymnastics academy in our city (north west) no matter how much they beg.

Absolutely hideous 'sport' and the culture is disgusting.

[dylexihelp]

There's a local gymnastic centre to me and they ran 'baby gym' sessions where you can basically accompany your baby/toddler around the equipment. They had nothing to do with any organised class so there was no interaction with staff.

However, sometimes gym classes would be going on at the same time and I saw the young girls stretching and being stood over, clearly in pain. It looked epically f*cked up and there was no way I was ever letting my DDs do gymnastics after seeing that.

[dylexihelp]

@CoastalWave

I'm feeling really awful about it. My daughter only quit gymnastics recently. She is mentally damaged from gymnastics. She suffered awful abuse. She also witnessed awful abuse. We were at 4 different clubs in total over 6 years, so it wasn't one club - it's the culture. It's ingrown in the coaches. The ones who aren't like this basically sneak around and can't be themselves.

Worse - it's the culture that parents are basically groomed too. If you tell anyone or if anyone is mentioning this, they say things like 'oh no way would I let that happen to my daughter, no one would speak to her like that etc etc - but the reality is, they basically threatened that if you complained, you were off the squad and your gymnastics was over.

Age 5 my daughter was left stood on the high beam for 2 hours - because she hadn't got up the courage to do a cartwheel on there. She had tears streaming down her face. Not only did not one of the watching parents intervene, when I arrived I was then yelled at by the coach to say how disrespectful she had been and she was 'this close' to being kicked off the squad. I just accepted it. :(

Age 6 - she was stretched to the point where she was in physical pain - the coach was laughing at her.

Age 7 she was told (in front of a full room of gymnasts) that her lunch box was unacceptable and that she wasn't eating the diet of an elite athlete and she was a failure - she would definitely be too fat to swing around the bars.

I'm thinking of ringing the helpline they've put on just because both of us are still so mentally damaged from all of this. How did I allow it to continue?

Your poor DD. Let down by everyone who should have protected her.

[CoastalWave]

@drpet49

“but the reality is, they basically threatened that if you complained, you were off the squad and your gymnastics was over.”

^Yet parents still allowed their child to take part. I could and would never do that to my kid.

You say that, but you weren't there. You haven't already spent 20+hours a week driving to and from gymnastics and watching your daughter improving for years. You know they need to be disciplined to 'make it' - everyone turns a blind eye to it, and god forbid if you were the one who spoke out - bye bye gymnast from the squad.

It's full on grooming of the parents. Plus, there's literally no way to complain. Days after all this came out, coach in the NW literally posted on Instagram to say how awful it all was and how appalled she was. She was one of the worst bullies!!! You have no where to go. You literally just have to accept you're quitting if you complain.

How do you tell your 6/7/8 yr old daughter that she's literally done blood sweat and tears for years - for nothing?

I was a parent who spoke up - I still have the abusive messages off numerous coaches on my phone. Nothing happens to these coaches. Nothing. Then they blacklist you from as many other clubs in the areas as they can muster up. Then even if you get through that - the last big comp my daughter did she was winning overall champion until suddenly she wasn't - guess who was judging??!