My feed

to access all these features

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.


Ex won't acknowledge receipt of petition, what can I do?

33 replies

CrimbleCrackers · 05/12/2017 00:27

I started divorce on the grounds of 2 years separation, because my ex didn't want the divorce to be for unreasonable behaviour. Now he won't sign the acknowledgement of service and has blocked my number.

I know why; we had a lot of debt during the marriage because he was frequently out of work and too lazy to find a new job. When we separated I made sure the proceeds of the sale of our house went towards paying off the debt in joint names, the debt that is left is only in his name now. He's worried because he thinks I won't pay any of it. I don't intend to because a) I'm off sick long-term for extreme depression and anxiety which I put partly down to the stress he's caused me and b) I always worked, even with a small child, sometimes as a cleaner or delivering catalogues just to be able to put food on the table and c) he has no intention of paying it off either, I negotiated a minimal payment and froze the interest when it became clear years ago that we couldn't keep up the payments, and he intends to keep on paying £1 a month per debt for the rest of time!

He's a nasty piece of work, never helped or did anything with our dd, always lazy, so I don't feel guilty.

However as states he's refusing to sign the acknowledgement of service. My only option is to change the reasons to unreasonable behaviour and use a bailiff to serve the papers. I'm using an online divorce company. My worry is he won't be home when they try to serve the papers or won't open the door. Then it'll just be another waste of money - that I'm having to borrow in the first place.

I want the divorce to avoid him involving me in any more debt he may run up and because I want as little as possible to do with him.

I've been more than reasonable regarding access to our daughter.

Any advice?


OP posts:
wwwwwwwwwwwwww · 05/12/2017 00:34

I can't offer any advice but poor you what a terrible situation.

CrimbleCrackers · 05/12/2017 14:53

Thank you.

I read online that the bailiffs inform beforehand when they'll be calling - I can't see him opening the door to them then.

OP posts:
TrojansAreSmegheads · 05/12/2017 14:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fantasmasgoria1 · 06/12/2017 10:34

Happened to me. He refused to sign papers twice so solicitor went ahead without him and divorce was granted!

Racmactac · 06/12/2017 10:38

You need to amend the petition to unreasonable behaviour. It will cost you £95 and if you haven't already make sure you tick the box to say you want to claim costs from him.

The court will then re serve it, if he doesn't sign and return then get the bailiffs to do it.

rizlett · 06/12/2017 10:38

Here's a good place to look.

CrimbleCrackers · 06/12/2017 14:22


It's not just that he won't sign the divorce papers .. he won't sign the acknowledgement that he's received them. He won't even tell me if he's received them. But they've been sent twice, and I know the address is correct.

OP posts:
pinkkoala · 06/12/2017 17:28

I am having same problems, i have another thread in relationships. My ex has received the papers and is ignoring them. I have photos to say he has received them. But my solicitor is saying give him more time and thrn send the process servers in, all this is at cost to me as he doesnt have a solicitor. I don't want to send process server as i have photos of the papers he has received.
Not sure where to go from here.

CrimbleCrackers · 06/12/2017 22:50

I read somewhere that if you have proof that he has received the papers the court may accept that.

OP posts:
pinkkoala · 08/12/2017 18:05

What happens if he refuses to take the papers off the process server. I mean if he doesn't willingly take them then what.
I think he will refuse to handle them.

CrimbleCrackers · 09/12/2017 02:07

I don't know .. I'm in the same situation Sad

OP posts:
Whoyagonna · 09/12/2017 02:12

Did you send the papers registered mail?

laudanum · 09/12/2017 02:45

This might be helpful..

Also this.

However, the best way forward is to hire an independent process server to personally serve the papers on your spouse and then file a statement to the court confirming so. If a reply is not received, the court will have independent evidence that your spouse is choosing not to respond. The reason for not responding is irrelevant. The District Judge will simply want to be satisfied that the papers have been successfully delivered.

LadyB49 · 09/12/2017 04:02

Your solicitor should be able to provide an affidavit and paperwork to prove the document was delivered. The judge will accept this.

However, I'd prefer to be using a local solicitor where i could discuss face to face, rather than on line.

MaitlandGirl · 09/12/2017 04:44

My ex also refused to acknowledge service - in the end I had him served at his place of work. He was so angry about that but it was his own fault really. I also have a friend who hired an independent process server who sat outside the ex’s home and waited till he opened the door and served the papers in the middle of the street. No idea what that cost as the server waited around for a few hours to catch him.

My ex ticked the box to say he’d cover costs, not realising that meant mine as well. He didn’t have a solicitor so thought he’d have nothing to pay, my solicitor refused to return any of my phone calls and replied to everything in a letter so my fees were stupidly large.

Good luck

CrimbleCrackers · 09/12/2017 11:32

Unfortunately I don't know where my ex works, he started a new job after I moved out.

I can't afford to use a solicitor, so I'm stuck with an online one. My ex has no money either so no chance he could pay the fees.

I didn't have a choice in how the papers were sent, I was never asked if I wanted them sent recorded?? I presumed the court sent them out, not the solicitor??

OP posts:
mummmy2017 · 09/12/2017 11:40

Go to his door, film yourself putting them inside and envelope and posting them through his door.
Also send a set Recorded deliver and one sent at the same time so they just get delivered.
You can send this proof to be included with the other documents.

CrimbleCrackers · 09/12/2017 23:09

I don't have the papers to deliver them. The online solicitor and the court have them. Also ex lives 350 miles away Sad

OP posts:
pinkkoala · 11/12/2017 20:50

Hi quick update. He says he has now signed acknowledgement of service and posted today. What is next. Does he have anything to sign. What happens now.

CrimbleCrackers · 12/12/2017 01:55

What are the grounds for your divorce?

OP posts:
HerRoyalNotness · 12/12/2017 01:59

I used a process server many years ago. I think I. Sent him a photo of the person and he delivered the papers and confirmed it by letter to me. The idiot wouldn't sign them in the end, even though he'd left me, we'd been separated 2 years and I'd just replied to his email that NO I did not want to get back together for another go Hmm

pinkkoala · 12/12/2017 18:34

My grounds for divorce are unreasonable behaviour. He has said he srnt the papers back to the court on monday so what will happen now when they receive them and is there any other paperwork he needs to agree and sign or is now for the court to decide. When does the decree nisci happen.

CrimbleCrackers · 12/12/2017 21:33

I know that he doesn't need to agree to the divorce for it to go ahead if on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour. But I'm not sure what happens if he defends.

OP posts:
laudanum · 13/12/2017 03:05

Well if he wishes to defend, it will cost him money to do so, so if he hasn't got any, then he's not going to get very far.

pinkkoala · 13/12/2017 15:53

He says he has agreed it and signed it. So as far as i know not defending.
What happens next. And does he have to sign and agree anything else.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.