Is it possible to become an "official carer", and how do I do it?

[iwishiwasonacruise]

Hi, I have absolutely no idea if I am posting in the right group, but it seems like a good place to start.

I'll try and keep this in a nutshell: basically my mum is undergoing tests and appointments for a currently undiagnosed neurological condition.

My mum is 76. Over the last 1 to 2 years her mobility has become really bad, her confusion has increased, her balance and spatial awareness are terrible etc. She is now not able to drive either.

When my mum was in her early 70s, she seemed like she was in her 60s, full of life and vivacious, and now she just seems like a really really old lady that's not able to do much other than sit in her chair… I am desperately trying to get answers, but it's a slow, slow process!

I live in the next road to my mum and she has become reliant on me for most stuff.

She has carers, provided by the local council, who do all of her personal care, get her up and ready for the day, get her ready for bed, prepare her meals and stuff.

But I do everything else: all of her life admin, phone calls, making arrangements, all of her shopping, many many appointments - it might not sound like much, but on top of two jobs, two kids, and my own life to run, it's a lot!

It literally feels like there's something every day, and certainly an appointment for something or other probably fortnightly. She has some other issues currently going on, she recently had an operation on her foot which has required multiple appointments, she has also needed some quite extensive dental work which has also required multiple appointments.

I was wondering if it is possible to become her "carer" in some official capacity, (a) seeing as she already has carers that are provided by the council, and (b) considering that she doesn't have a diagnosis of anything just yet.

I know there is a payment/money element to this, but that's not what I'm interested in.

The reason I need to be recognised as a carer is that one of my jobs is working in a school, and we are not meant to have days off in term time. We are allowed the odd day off, here and there, if it's for a dependent (which would currently be my children) but my mum isn't officially one of my dependants, even though, realistically, she is. Obviously I do try and arrange appointments around my school job, but this isn't always possible.

She already has multiple appointments coming up this year, where it's likely that I will need odd days off work here and there, and I think they will probably only be accommodating in this if I can prove a bit more literally that my mum is one of my dependents.

Does something like this even exist? All of this dealing with the council and the social workers is very new to me.

I am also currently in the process of trying to get her a blue badge but the social worker wasn't helpful about that, so probably not worth asking her about how to get carer status.

Many thanks if anyone can help.

[IthinkIsawahairbrushbackthere]

My situation was slightly different as I claimed Carers Allowance but a friend who was a teacher cared for her parents and even though they had 24 hour care in their home she was still the one responsible for getting them to and from appointments etc. She didn't get any financial allowance but her union rep in the school made sure it was recorded and she was entitled to time off to deal with stuff.

You can register with the GP - hers and yours if different. You should be entitled to a Carers Assessment (nothing to do with finance) although I waited two years and never had one!

I had a card I carried in my purse that said something to the effect that there was a vulnerable person at home who depended on me - in case of emergency type thing.

If you google your local authority you might find something there. I just googled my own local authority ("register as carer for family member" "local authority") and it comes up with links and forms to complete. I would think most places offer similar support. I would do that and check with the surgery as well.

[PritiPatelsMaker]

I don't know if there's a special Carer's status. You can let her GP surgery know you're her Carer and you can apply for Carer's Allowance, if you want to and join your local Carer's Support Group but I'm not sure that you can force your Employer to recognise her as one of your Dependents.

Have you got a Union that you could ask?

If she's having Carer's in 4 times a day and she's still not managing though @iwishiwasonacruise, it does sound as though she might need full time care.

[Mac11]

Yes, you are her PA. You can be claiming disability allowances
It's paid for exactly this situation and is non means tested. About £90/wk for day care and a lot more if she needs care at night.
Ask DWP. Try going through your GP surgery, social services or citizens advice. You can go on line to get a blue badge from your district council. You will need a passport photo of Mum and £10.
If they get picky ask for a letter of corroberation from the gp. Always paint the blackest picture, if it's not needed now, it will be soon, and the process is going to be slow.

[NotDoingOk]

If you don't have lasting power of attorney for mum, that's something you need to do. It will allow you to legally manage her finances and care decisions if she becomes unable to do it herself.