Managers and HR people. Are you starting to see people signed off for mental health reasons?

[Canyoutellilikrchocolate]

Specifically those who have been attempting to WFH with kids?

[joan04]

I am on the verge of a breakdown today as well. Been online working since 8 and still not done, will likely be online until gone 9 this evening, it's almost as though my boss is making work up in order to give me stuff to do. Slack messages and emails before I even logged on, loads throughout the day and they are still going now.

I too have never had any mental health problems and do consider myself to be a very resilient person (you have to be to work in HR) but this is something else. I have to work with the senior leadership team a fair bit who all earn around 150k each whereas I am on 35k, they expect me to show the same levels of commitment to the company too. I honestly think it's because they can't keep an eye on me or set me tasks in the office, it's a form of control and they need to show their bosses that they are also managing.

Today I had a Zoom call with them and one of them spent 15 minutes of the call showing us her new patio furniture where she was working outdoors in the sun in her big detached house garden. I live in a baking hot one bedroom studio top floor flat and have to work on my sofa as I don't even have a proper table and chairs. I'm on a main road too so can't even open the front windows when the weather is like this. Its soul destroying.

I thought about calling in sick today as I did have a horrendous headache this morning but thought that would be hugely frowned upon because I am at home and they would have thought I'd be doing it because of the weather.

[PaperMonster]

This week has almost broken me. I’m in FE. I have to account for every hour I’m working - which adds to my workload. It’s non-stop. I can’t even help my child with her school work. Today she’s been in floods of tears because she doesn’t want me to work. Thankfully I’m part time. I spend a lot of time on the phone to students And their line managers - too many IT issues to Video call them. I’ve not even had a welfare call from anyone. I can’t work when my child’s gone to bed as I go at the same time as her. In the normal course of work I wouldn’t spend this much time in front of a screen and I’ve had to give my phone number to my students so they can get hold of me - but they forget I’m part time. Not that I mind helping them - but I feel then that I’m not helping them as much because I don’t have my resources at my fingertips. I feel very isolated and the management email demands are relentless. Had enough. Wish I could leave.

[ImInAStateOfMind]

@joan04 we use Teams instead of Slack (public sector). There is no way to disable or hide when you are online and when you were last seen. Managers video call you on it with no warning. We’re sent chat messages and if we don’t respond immediately we get follow up emails - or a video call! It’s very intrusive.

[ImInAStateOfMind]

Oh and we have had emails asking us why we would want to take annual leave at the moment, with the implication being that we are at home with nothing else to do so why shouldn’t we be happy to work all day every day?!

[ImInAStateOfMind]

Public sector here.

Absolutely no consideration to mental health/ caring responsibilities/ health concerns etc.

In fact we have had an increase in micro management and workload.

In the incessant Zoom team meetings they say things like “oh it’s so hard for everyone right now, we all have to be flexible and understanding” then thirty mins later they’re sending out emails with busy work.

It’s very stressful.

[10storeylovesong]

DH and I are both still working full time shifts (police and NHS). His work has been very flexible and he has worked his shifts around mine, but mine aren't flexible at all. I'm deliberately getting 3 hours sleep between shifts. I'm knackered and at breaking point. I've been referred to occy health for anxiety. I've never suffered with mental health problems before.

[polkadotpjs]

I've not once been asked if I'm ok. Personally. Only been asked about work stuff. And given extra. I'm WFH with two children. One ks3 but getting so much work he's super stressed and needs someone to help explain it (and teach it) and ks2 child who doesn't want to do anything. It's so hard and an acknowledgement of this would be great. Colleagues without children are fine and enjoying WFH. I like wfh but not with the added pressure of children.

[Laniakea]

Joan that’s the situation dh is in ... survived this round of redundancies (“change of focus”) that saw 19 of 24 go. His team is down from eight to two & still has work for eight people ... he has to be available on slack constantly & on top of the insane workload there’s the survivors guilt at still being employed, fear that it won’t stay like that for long & crushing responsibility of keeping things going. He had leave booked yesterday & was still working until midnight when I went to bed & I was woken up by the emails & messages rolling in at 4am. It’s unsustainable but as far as we can tell will only let up if he is made redundant too which is not a good outcome.

(And he’s the only one in both our extended families who is still working ... it’s creating a very strange divide where he isn’t constantly available for pub quizzes & zoom life drawing classes!)

[minny80]

@joan04 I also use Slack at work and I appreciate it can be intense. I think it's up to us to define boundaries though. My slack goes in Do Not Disturb out of office hours and I have disabled notification on my phone so I only get them when I am on the laptop. I've invited people I manage to do the same, and make clear I don't expect them to work out of hours.
I appreciate some companies will have a culture to pressurise employees into a long hours work pattern. On the other hand make the point of switching off will help you to be more focused and productive during the day so maybe this is a conversation you could try to proactively have with your manager?

[Canyoutellilikrchocolate]

@joan04 we use Teams which is like Slack and I know what you mean.

[EmbarrassedUser]

I just don’t have enough work to do at the moment. The sort of work I do has ground to a halt and whilst it will pick up a lot needs to be rearranged for the future. That’s part of what I’m doing now. It’s public sector (MOD) so no job worries, just a bit boring.

[joan04]

I read this article this last night: //www.peoplemanagement.co.uk/news/articles/hr-managers-fear-rise-staff-absence-mental-ill-health-lockdown

Just wondered if anyone else is struggling at work with an 'always online' culture? I work for a media company and we have this program called Slack which is horrendous as you never feel you can switch off - it's basically a chat program but seems to be the default medium for setting work and talking to others in the company. My boss is one of those that really enjoys her career and can't seem to understand why others see their job as just a job either so is thriving in this environment.

I know I'm really lucky to have a job at the moment and this isn't meant as a woe is me type post but it's really affecting my mental health and anxiety levels. The first thing I do in the morning and last thing at night is check Slack, I don't have a commute or lunch break to break up the day and feel that unless I am online for 10 hours a day then it will be noticed by senior management. We have just had to make half the company redundant which has only added to the pressure as I work in a cost centre side of the business rather than revenue generator.

I just wondered how others in the same boat are getting on and might have any advice.

[KatherineJaneway]

Can you tell i am not a fan?

I'm getting the hint

[Realitea]

We only have 13 people working for us and they’ve all been fantastic. Apart from one. He’s not working from home and has said he’s not coping well. He lives alone and we’ve had complaints about him. It’s very tough.

[TheTiaraManager]

Saddened by the number of you that have uncaring managers & are working flat out

I'm on ML just now so feel quite fortunate in some respects

[minny80]

I manage a team where I am the only parent. I am divorced and fortunately I have my 5yo just half of the time during the week. One member of my team was on compassionate leave for several weeks ( parent died to Covid). Now that she is back another member is off sick with mental health issues, been away for 2 weeks and he is going to be away 2 more weeks. I need to support the team, do more work because of missing people, work while homeschooling my son a few days per week, and also give the good example. My manager doesn't have children either so, although he shows sympathy when I explain things are not easy, conversations always fall on how carrying on business as usual. My company keeps sending out surveys to "check" on us and I keep feedback they need to be clearer on how they can support working parents... Really I can't see any other solution other that push forward.

[Livpool]

My manager (not my direct line manager I should add! But our team manager) has been great. My DS is 4 and my DH has had to go to work a couple of times a week.

He understands that we can only do what we can. He knows us so knows no one is taking the piss.

It isn't just people with children though - he acknowledges this is very difficult for everyone

[Whattodowhattodooo]

I've got a 5 year old and 11 month old. I am expected to do my full 25 hours in the week. I have to put my hours worked on a word document and at the end of the week this is emailed and then monitored to ensure I'm logging in/working when I say I am. Whether it actually IS monitored, I don't know..... I'm expected to do most of my work in the evening. Kids in bed by 7pm. I get to bed just gone 12ish most nights. Up at 6am.

I'm probably actually doing MORE work than when I was in the office. No distractions. Plausible situation long term? Good god no, I'm mentally and physically knackered!!

[anothernamechangeagain]

As I can wfh *

[anothernamechangeagain]

I'm public sector, expected to work my normal hours at my normal pace with a 3yo at home.
Haven't been asked if I'm coping was just told I had to work or take unpaid leave. Can't be furloughed as key worker, can't get childcare as I can't work from home.

[Peggysgettingcrazy]

Not sure i am a hero.

Ironically, I was brought into the company because tbey don't have enough managers that genuinely know how to manage and support their teams.

The MD recognised their attrition was high because managers were no good in actually supporting people.

I have always had successes because, where possible I put people before targets. I find that when you do that, targets look after themselves. Makes my life easier and happier. Makes my teams lives easier and happier.

Of course there's a definite line and sometimes you have to make the hard decisions, or give a bollocking. Which I am happy to do.

My job is to get the companys MI out. Personally, as long as its legal, I think its up to me how I manage the team that do it.

Its not heroic. I think its what people managers should do. At a minimum.

But thank you, that's very sweet.

[Pluckedpencil]

@peggysgettingcrazy you are a modern day hero and deserve a big fat promotion. If everyone took your approach to their team, the problem would be halved. Well done for getting on with it despite the classic "absent" manager above you. Big love to all the middle managers who deal with all the real problems and yet have nowhere to go with their own, try to not absorb too much these days, your team are not children and they don't need you to drain yourselves dry.

[blackcat86]

Me and Dh are public sector and expected to do our normal work and working hours with a not yet 2 year old at home. I'm shielding to. Managers appear to constantly raise the expectations. For DH this means 2 days a week of being locked in our office with constant phone calls and 3 days sharing childcare but also having 2 video chat meetings. For me, my boss expects me to be avaliable for core hours for calls/video calls and then 'suggested' that if I wasnt working effectively i could also catch up in the evenings. As well as more admin tasks, calls, welfare checks and video chats we are now expected to do other tasks outside of this to. Any unhappiness from staff is being ruled as 'staff anxiety' rather than poor management and risk management. I am considering being signed off with stress if this continues. I cant do 12hr days whilst caring for a toddler!

[Peggysgettingcrazy]

How would he suggest dealing with children during those hours though?

Thats not his problem

The company communicated that employees can not look after children AND work and if they had no other choice then they would need unpaid leave.

Thankfully, he hasn't bothered contacting me in the last 8 weeks, so has no idea what the set up is here. Dp was living here, but we decided he needed to move out for some space. So he has no idea i am at home alone with my kids (not dps).

He certainly wouldnt have the faintest clue about what's happening in my teams homes. Thankfully, he keeps right out and (i think) is taking a 'if no one tells me and I dont have to do anything about it'.


I mean he is fine. His wife is a sahm. They have a live in nanny/housekeeper that they have had for years, so is oart of their household. He is all good. If he is all good a coping, he doesnt really understand why others can't. The fact that he is a millionaire, doesnr apparently come into it.


Can you tell i am not a fan?

[KatherineJaneway]

@Peggysgettingcrazy

In all honesty, my boss who is the MD would not be happy if he found out we were doing this. He feels we should work the standard 8-5

How would he suggest dealing with children during those hours though?