Neighbour abusing vulnerable delivery slots - what to do?

[Doeeys]

Need advice on what I should do...since the lockdown began, my neighbour receives on average 3-4 large online deliveries from Asda, Sainsbury's and Tesco, this usually occur on consecutive day's - this week she has had them Sunday (Sainsbury's), Monday (Tesco) and today (Asda). She is in her mid 40s and has asthma and has been classed vulnerable, however she often goes out during the week to do top up shops as I see her unloading shopping from her car. She has also contacted the local volunteer group to also get 3 large 6pints of milk when she only has herself and one 7yr old. What is concerning me is that there are really vulnerable and elderly people out there that can't even get one delivery slot and she has had 10plus deliveries since the lockdown and it appears she is abusing the system. I have a small 6mth old baby and I am still going out as I know there are people out there that are truly vulnerable and need these extra priority services. What are your views on this and what would you do?

[Marpan]

You sound really nosey, stop stalking your neighbour and play with your baby.

[ginandnappies]

Wait so you expect her to instantly sort out all the food on her doorstop and then deliver it to other households? Just because she isn't doing that means she isnt suppling it? How long are you standing at the window watching? Few hours just to be sure?!

[Notajogger]

Yeah she sounds like a selfish arse. You could mention it and see what she says.
People are funny on here about "minding your own business" as you should always assume someone is a saint in disguise though.

[toomanypillows]

I've managed to get a delivery slot once a week with Morrisons since this all started. I've also had meat deliveries from a butchers and fruit and veg deliveries from a greengrocers.
In each I order a load of stuff for my parents and DH drops it at their house on his way home from work (he's a keyworker doing 12 hour shifts)
I'm classed as vulnerable. Not ont of my neighbours would know that. I don't look "vulnerable" and I've never told them. None of my colleagues know either. In fact, I only revealed it when my school was closed down (before the main shut down, due to a confirmed case of a staff member) and I had to disclose when they were asking for volunteers to staff for keyworkers children.
My points being: a) I've managed to get several deliveries no sweat (not registered with any supermarket as extremely vulnerable) b) I'm buying for other family members but don't leave the house myself and c) no one knows about my medical condition

I reckon all of what you have said can be readily explained.

Online deliveries are for people who book them 🤷‍♀️

[housemdwaswrong]

I'm shielding and have priority weekly delivery slot. My shopping could seem excessive if someone was counting my bags. Delivery slots here are horrendously difficult to get.

I order shopping for my sister as my nephew had open heart surgery a year ago. He's not on a list, but understandably my sister is trying to limit exposure. I add a bag or two for the food bank as loads of people here have had to sign on to UC and are waiting for their first payment. I also ask vulnerable but not shielding family or friends if I can save them a small top up shop.

Of course you wouldn't know this, or know that my of my 2 parents who I live with, one is also shielding and the other has dementia, early stages but def not capable of shopping.

I know it can seem frustrating, especially for those in genuine need, but you don't always know the full story. Oh, and all the bags come into my house, I dont take them anywhere, they are collected from my driveway.

Of course, she could be a selfish bint as displayed fairly accurately by all the panic buying.

[Kinneddar]

she isn't doing shopping for other households as she's always unloading into her house rather than taking supplies to other households

Well I hope my neighbours don't work with your ridiculous logic. My Tesco shopping is unloaded into my house. Once it's in my kitchen I separate it and put my shopping away and rebag my Mums to take over to her

I cant imagine being this interested in my nrighbours life

[WotchaTalkinBoutWillis]

Wow I didn't realise there was such ignorance and ppl were so judgmental

But.... but..... you're being Judgy McJudgerpants yourself and being ignorant of others circumstances?
Mind going to "she's a slot stealer and hoarding food" instead of thinking there could be other scenarios like shopping for vulnerable, or part of an online volunteer group?
What's Grenfell got to do with anything? So just because you say apparently people faked being at Grenfell, that means your neighbour must be lying/hoarding/not above board too?

Drip, Drip, Drip

Was going to have another question but then saw this and yep, about sums it up lol

She'll be selling drugs to kids next

[ajandjjmum]

Can't believe the OP is getting such a tough time on here - and that people believe it's fine for someone to have four deliveries in one week.

I agree that there is no point getting wound up about it, but in no way is it acceptable by my standards - in these times. Normally I wouldn't give a monkeys.

Flags are out here - just managed to get my first 'Click and Collect' slot for four weeks! No chance with a delivery - so yes, I am jealous of all those who manage to get multiple deliveries a week - even if I think they're selfish bastards!

[AllyBamma]

Ah there’s the drip feed, of course. If you know her so well, why not go and ask her? And I’m sorry but you can’t call us judgmental when you’re the one counting her bloody rubbish bags and inferring all sorts from that information. Pot, kettle and all that. Get a life OP.

[Slurpy]

You'd make a great Stasi informant OP

[Haffiana]

Because this is something that can cause a rift and I'm don't want to ruin our relationship, morally I know what she is doing wrong but at the same time I have to live next to this lady and I don't want that kind of negative atmosphere for my family when we are home all the time

But she has a moral right to know exactly what sort of nosy, judgemental, prying person you are. She deserves to know how two-faced you are. She ought to know what she is living next to. That would be fair.

You should tell her so that she can deal with you appropriately.

[Honkingallthewaytothebank]

We live in a quiet neighbourhood where unfortunately everyone knows everyone's business

It doesn’t sound like you find any of this unfortunate. You seem to be rather enjoying the drama of each deafening delivery.

If it’s that important to you, just ask her 🤷‍♀️. Or, obvs, call the supermarket delivery gestapo. Sounds like you could head up one of their regional factions very well.

Please, if you decide to call her out on her Terribly Unpatriotic actions, do come back to let us know how grateful she is to you for pointing out her selfish behaviour. To the re-education camp she goes!

[TheGreatWave]

Well, if there really is someone having 3 orders a week in very quick succession, it isn't great and unless they are buying for 1/2 a dozen extra people unlikely to require an extra 2 deliveries to make sure they get all the food needed.

OP - I'm not going to be rude and tell you to get a hobby etc, but there is nothing you can do about it so it is best to let it go, you can't control her behaviour so stop focusing on what she is doing.

[andyoldlabour]

Peppafrig

Very difficult to miss them when I go out of the house, they are lined up like soldiers on parade.
Together with the plastic and paper card waste, it was like the Berlin wall had gone up again.
The neighbourhood foxes are having a field day. There was food waste strewn all over their front garden.

[bama4]

You are way too nosey I suggest you spend more time finding a new hobby.

I don't even know what my next door neighbour looks like never mind how much fucking shopping they have

[Jessikka]

Perhaps relatives are ordering online themselves and using her house as delivery address. If they are fightend and vulnerable and would prefer her to take the food to them it would make sense.

[Iwantacookie]

Do you expect them to come take her shopping back?
It's none of your business what she has delivered unless sainsbury's delivers bombs now.

[BackInTime]

OP you have made me very self conscious about our family shopping habits. Is this what we have resorted to - curtain twitching and watching what shopping our neighbours are doing I am not vulnerable and have managed to get weekly delivery slots as I've had a delivery subscription for years. I sometimes go out to do top up shopping (teenagers at home all day food goes fast) and I shop for an elderly relative. Does this mean my neighbours are watching and think I'm some sort of criminal.

[MaryBerrystolemyflour]

In these testing times OP is it really necessary to come on here with your bullshit made up scenario in an attempt to wind everyone up? Really? Shame on you. What a pathetic person you must be.

I’d hate to live near you. I order three van loads of flour every day and I can’t even bake. I sit on the swings in the off limits playpark outside Prue Leith’s house and taunt her with my floury hoard.

[abbey44]

I wish I knew her secret to getting even one delivery, never mind several a week. I'm on Sainsbury's vulnerable list and still haven't been able to get a delivery for the last three weeks, and there are none available for the next God knows how long either in our area.

[TrickyKid]

You must spend a lot of time looking at what your neighbors are up to if you always see the deliveries arriving. If she's getting three large deliveries a week what's she doing with all the food?

[cabbageking]

As part of a volunteer delivery group I don't look at what is being delivered and who I repeatedly deliver too. I have no idea when they open the door if they are vulnerable or not. Nor will other volunteers bother if they have been asked for assistance. Sometimes the stock comes in after a person has visited the shop for that item

She isn't breaking any laws, or interfering with you. You don't know who can and can not get a spot that she otherwise has.

You are surmising and really have no concrete proof of anything.
Enjoy the time and the good weather with your child and forget the neighbours routine.

[BringMeSunshineInMyLife]

Well 2 weeks ago our bin was half empty on pick up day
Tonight I am going to have to pop one of the children for 10 minutes in to stamp it down to get the last bag in. No hoarding involved.

[Feefifoo]

Tesco admits 90% of people won't get any access to home delivery slots www.mirror.co.uk/money/coronavirus-tesco-warns-still-only-21831824

[SleepingStandingUp]

Oh God I how my neighbours aren't counting my rubbish bags, they'll wonder what I'm doing as I keep drinking them in the next door bin!