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Help! DD won't leave nursery with new nanny!

8 replies

bossykate · 15/10/2007 17:50

She cries and refuses to go with him! Dh had to go and rescue them today. Yes, we have had a settling in period.

What to do now? What about bribery with chocolate? Any other ideas?


OP posts:

ShinyHappyPurpleSeveredHeads · 15/10/2007 17:52

How old is she? Does she seem to genuinely not like him? Is she ok with him in other settings?


bossykate · 15/10/2007 17:54

  1. No she's absolutely fine with him otherwise. He seems very good with the kids
OP posts:

bossykate · 15/10/2007 18:11

any more for anymore?

have to go soon and feel i should arrive at home with some ideas... even if their not originally mine


OP posts:

bossykate · 15/10/2007 18:11

arrrgh! they're

OP posts:

JennaJ · 15/10/2007 19:47

Is dd used to you picking her up from nursery? Or has she had a nanny pick her up before?

I would say that if she is used to you or your dh picking her up then her reaction to new nanny collecting her is normal...which child would want nanny picking them up, they want mummy or daddy!!! I would suggest that if this is the case then neither you or your dh should 'rescue' nanny. Either you could take the 'tough' approach and choose the peel and run method. Staff at the nursery will just have to hand her to nanny screaming and he can carry her off quickly..this sounds awful but she 'should' settle incredibly quickly once she realises this is the only option and it should calm down VERY quickly. A slightly more subtle approach would be for a grandparent or close friend to go with nanny to collect, someone familiar for your dd but NOT mummy or daddy. This should ease the transition from mummy and Daddy -nanny.
However...if you have had a nanny collecting dd from nursery previously then I would be a little more concerned about her reaction...was she happy with her old nanny? Any pickup anxiety? what has changed with new nanny? Maybe she just needs a little more time to get used to him.
Give it time and chat with nursery about pickup stratergies , get them to prepare her for nanny arriving etc. Failing that bribery and corruption is always a good quick fix!!
Good luck- don't despair yet!


nannynick · 15/10/2007 23:43

What is the nursery pickup procedure... could he for instance arrive, stay for a little while getting involved with whatever DD was doing at time of his arrival. Then once that activity was over, both of them leave.

Is she old enough to say why she does not want to leave nursery with him? Perhaps it's something to do with transport?


RahRahRachel · 16/10/2007 19:22

The little girl (aged 2) I look after cried every time I picked her up from nursery at first. Sometimes mummy picks her up, so basically I was a poor second choice! It's got better now, but tbh I take some little 'bribe' with me - some sweets etc - just in case she's difficult. If your DD will go happily with him when bribed with chocolate, at least that means it's not that she hates the nanny, just maybe she'd rather someone else was picking her up?


bossykate · 25/10/2007 10:04

hello everyone.

thank you for all your advice here

in the end it was perseverance that won the day - she just needed a little more time to get used to the idea and in the meantime we used taxis.

bribery with chocolate only worked part of the way home which led to a couple of very embarrassing situations for my poor nanny - when she kicked off bystanders thought he was abducting her! poor chap.

thanks for all your help

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