Lady Teasmade it's not about plinky plonk music and mood lighting. With my last birth I listened to the medical advice right down to the last word, because I respected and trusted them. I allowed them to induce me, to foetally monitor me inside and out, to deny me food and water for 48 hrs, to hook me up to a drip, to catheterise me (even tho I begged them not to, and promised I would wee in a jug so they could monitor my output), to give me an epidural for the blood pressure, to behave myself and lie on a bed for the entire procedure. My baby was so stonked out when she was born she wouldn't breast feed and I was no use as I couldn't stand upright due to the crushing headache I ended up with, cos of the hole in my spinal membrane caused by the botched epidural - a headache that lasted 2 weeks.
It took me almost 2 years to find that special bond with my daughter, due to guilt, the sense of failure as a mother, the failure to breast feed, etc My dd might not remember where she was born, but i am damn sure see remembers the fall out from it.
So I do believe that birth is about the mother as well as the baby. I am not trying to put my baby in harms way, my pregnancy has been totally straight forward, I don't see that I am a high risk mother.
BTW, I am 35 weeks.
I have seen a consultant at 16 weeks who said I should give birth where I wanted and that a truamatic birth should be avoided at all costs for the mental health of the mother. She could see no reason why I shouldn't give birth at the MLU.
I have been monitored v. closely during this pregnancy, I've been having 2 weekly MW appointments since 28 weeks, and had a growth scan at 30 weeks (all good).
I saw my MW this afternoon (I never see the same one either!) and she agreed that she couldn't understand why the MLU wouldn't have me. She is booking me in with the senior MW for my next appointment to discuss my options and see what can be done about my giving birth in the MLU. But she did say, in her opinion, that home birth would be bottom of the list, the MLU at Buxton next (because it's a 40 min trip to hospital) and the MLU at the Stepping Hill hospital preferrable.
Thanks for the AIMS link Tangle.
Brilliant advice on here as usual, thanks everyone.