What's the bottom line - is giving birth without chemical pain relief manageable? Yes or No!

[Baretoes]

If you could answer either 'yes' or 'no' ONLY - what would your answer be?

[PreservingAnonymity]

It's not an easy question, is it?!
So: yes and no

[Fattymumma]

yes!

I had an epdural with my first and it made everything slow down wrse than it already was. i ended up with a 74 hour labour, epesiotomy, forceps and a distressed baby that had to spend teh night in soecial care.

with my 2nd i had nothing, not so much as a paracetomol as i was convinced it was the epi that caused the problems and voila! dd arrived in about 20 minutes perfect and happy.

i have been reading a lot about birth trauma ( because DS has SN and want to look at the possibility of a link) and i think that the less intervention you can have the better.

it may not be for everyone but a completly natural birth is absolutly possible

[3andnomore]

Hmm...maybe my friends comments, who had all assisted Births/episiotomie/or ECS first time round will be more enlightening, lol....first time round all took whatever offered, trusting in their m/w's, and the system and ended up in a highly distressing and medical intervention Birth...one with a C-section!
All those girls had another Baby this year, all went for the natural approach and all could not believe just how amazing it was....yes, pain at tiems is BAD, but they all mentioned just how amazing it was to actualy feel the child coming down and out of the Birthcanal..even though it was painful...but it really stuck in their mind that they knew exactly where their lil one was at anyone time....
Maybe because with both my first I never really appreciated that part enough, even though I always felt it was important...but it was that C-section wiht my last that tought me that I , persoanly now, just couldn't feel the same way after my Baby had been extracted from me, as I did with the Births that I had done almost au natural...each time entonox for the last hour!

[izzybiz]

Yes!!

I have had 2 natural births with no pain releif atall, not even gas and air

With my 1st i was only 16 and had a very long labour, was offered an epidural but declined as ithought it would hurt!

With 2nd 11 years later, i was induced as i was extremely ill, and i did ask for an epidural as i had drips and things anyway! Was told to wait till i was 5cms, next thing i knew she was being born so no time.

Was really glad after that i didnt get one.
Definately would reccomend giving it a try, so proud afterwards!!

[GoingQuietlyMad]

My God!

I expected so many "No"s and nearly every one is a yes.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO![SHOCK]

I barely made it past admission to hospital before I had epidurals with both. With the second one, I just thought, why go through any more pain than I have to.

I certainly felt like I would have died without it, but at the very least traumatised into never having sex again.

[Fattymumma]

the sense of pride is amazing if you can manage without.

[puppydavies]

i think so much depends on circumstances and the point is you can't choose what kind of delivery you have.

yes, you can be well informed about the effects of the different options. yes, you can be aware of the chain of intervention. yes you can write a birth plan and be surrounded by supportive professionals and friends/partner. yes you can use all the different options for pain relief. yes, you can be active throughout your labour. yes, you can be optimistic and empowered and believe that you can do it. yes, you can opt for a home birth to minimise the chance of intervention.

and yes, you can still end up in an operating theatre totally grateful that the interventions are available and you don't have to suffer additional distress because of interminable, intense, unrelieved pain. yunno.

it seems ridiculous to me to discount that possibility, or to set yourself up for regret and feelings of failure because you expect yourself to be able to manage without pain relief.

[GoingQuietlyMad]

But if I wanted pain and hardship I could climb Everest or something.

Is this a known kicker-off, because I am happy to agree with anyone to avoid a row?

[ledodgyfireworksingedmyeyebrow]

Yes but it does hurt like hell

[KathyMCMLXXII]

Sorry, but I'm not convinced by the 'women have been doing it for centuries without' argument. Sure they have, but loads of women and babies have DIED and are STILL DYING in countries where it's not available. As MI says, it's not just fear which is the problem, it's also physiology.
Pain is exhausting. One of the benefits of pain relief is that it allows you to focus all your energy on getting the baby out, instead of wasting it dealing with the pain. How many women get to the point where without some pain relief they would just end up giving up? Good midwives etc can go a very long way to help but I'm not convinced that they can solve the exhaustion problem in every case, even if they can in the majority of normal births.

[Piffle]

Yes
from personal experience

[Fattymumma]

i had an epidural with my first and by the time DD was crowning i was screaming for an epidural with my second but i am really proud of myself for not having one.

when i was pg with 2nd i wanted to try without but when iw as actually in labour i asked, it hurt and that was all that mattered lol

but i couldnt have one and im glad. now i have done it i would not have pain relief again if i had another.
i was up and having a shower within 10 minutes of delivery with DD! with DS i was sponged down by a fat midwife with BO and couldnt stand up for 24 hours.

and yes, it is amazing that despite the pain you can feel your baby travel through yo body and it makes the whoel thing a lot more magical.

[puppydavies]

well said kathy

[poppynic]

I did with first - mainly coz thought it too embarrassing to ask after 1 hour and then it was too late. DP was very impressed and now suggesting I can do it again if have a cs . Well people can chop their limbs off if necessary without pain relief - but I don't think I will be.

[Fattymumma]

but baies died because of poor sanitation, infection and poor medical interventio when needed...not because mum was in pain.

you can't give up pushing you baby out becasue your body does it itself.

I was really freaked out at first with my second as i could actualy fell my body expell the baby, the midwife told me to stop pushing and i screamed at her " i can't its doing it by itself" my mum (mother of 10 who has never had PR) was in hysterics at that.

pain relief is what normally slows the birth down and certainly in my case, causes more problems that in eases

[puppydavies]

"you can't give up pushing you baby out becasue your body does it itself"

if the baby is in the right position, perhaps.

[KathyMCMLXXII]

Babies die for all sorts of reasons, Fattymumma. It is only my guess that exhaustion is ever a factor, but having experienced a 32 hour labour which went much better once I'd had an epidural after 22 hours and was actually able to get some strength back, I would strongly suspect that there are cases where running out of energy is a factor.

FWIW I think the OP is a pretty silly question really - the majority of births probably are manageable, a minority maybe aren't. Forcing everyone to generalise with a big 'Yes they are manageable' (as if it applies to everyone) will only piss off those of us who didn't have that kind of a birth experience, or know people who haven't, which is pretty daft because most people on this thread probably know full well that their experience doesn't apply to everyone.

BTW I love the way some people have decided that gas & air doesn't count as chemical pain relief because it's what they had but they clearly still want to answer 'yes' for some reason.

Now I'm going to parp myself off this thread before someone posts something really naive and smug and I get pissed off

[Cakehead]

I'm always a bit puzzled by the 'amazing sense of pride if you manage without' thing. I had a 48 hour labour, blissfuly sped up by a mobile epi in the last 7 hours. I was hugely proud when I delivered DD, but because she was so beautiful and perfect and such a little miracle. I wasn't really thinking about myself or my 'performance' in labour at all, it was all about her, not me...

And because my epidural was well-managed, I could walk about, feel the baby moving down, etc.

Everyone's different and you do what you need to get through. It's not like it goes on your CV or anything...

[GoingQuietlyMad]

God, with the labours I had, I would have willingly let someone chop a limb off just to get the pain relief.

[riab]

Yes, its managable but that doens't mean you have to do it!

i doubt you would die from the pain but its entirely possible to be so exhausted and in pain especially if you get a long labour that they decide to speed things up for you and the baby!

I had a home birth with no pain relief at all (not exactly planned that way!)

[riab]

oh and i'm with those who say why on earth be 'proud' of doing without? i did without cos it was so unexpected but hell I'd have pain relief in a nanosecond if I had the chance! the pain was worse than anything I could have ever imagined. But then i don;t thin there's anything especially magical or mystical about giving birth. its smelly, bloody and painful, for all concerned. I broke DH thumb cos of no pain relief!

the end result is a baby, why put yourself through loads of pain if you dont' have to? (and yes i know there are all kinds of statistics showing this that and the other about babies who are born with pain relief)

[JoshandJamie]

Cakehead: it's not like it goes on your CV or anything...



Imagine if it did? Right, i see you can type 100 words a minute, speak 3 foreign languages and can give birth without pain relief. Well that's the clincher. You've got the job. Because this job is a big fat pain in the arse.

[Tortington]

i suppose
yes

with a

"why the fuck would you ever want to - you dont get a fucking medal"

as a footnote

[LadyOfThePoinsettias]

i had gas and air in the pool both times. i didnt want to use anything else for various reasons, one being i have a strong needle phobia.
i am proud of myself as i am a wimp but managed to stay in control. whats wrong with that?
i dont tell everyone i meet.
it could have been very different but i was lucky both births were straight forward.

[SenoraPostrophe]

you might not get a medal, custy, but you do recover quicker without an epidural, and pethidine doesn't take the pain away anyway.