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Childbirth

Am I completely bonkers to be even vaguely considering a homebirth????

33 replies

HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 16:16

Given that DS1 was a CS due to waters breaking, baby in "possible" distress - didn't even have braxton hicks with him, let alone proper contractions. (although TBH I slightly suspect they were busy, I was a young(ish) 1st time mum and I was an 'easy' otion for a CS........).

DS2 again waters broke before anything else happened. Did have some braxton hicks and a whole night of false labour pains. But then was induced and had the most hellish labour imaginable (to me anyhow).

I was actually given 2 shots of pethidine and the 'maximum' number of allowed epidural top-ups...........only the first shot of pethidine worked - and I think the physcological effects of thinking I was getting painrelief and then it not actually happening was worse than the pain IYKWIM. I then had a ventouse delivery (didn't really have much chance of pushing him out on my own as I'd been strapped to the monitor all nightt (due to it being a VBAC and concerns about rupture esp as the pain relief didn't seem to be working) and was lying flat on my back (great birthing position hey ).

For the delivey itself I was wheeled into theatre, incase the Ventouse didn't work and I had to be given a GA for an EMCS, had an episiotomy (sp) and 3/4th degree tear and then was stitched up with no extra pain relief as the local they'd given me for the episitomity had worn off and "I'd already had too many drugs pumped into me".

The consultants that came and went (I think there were 2 - but may have just been one) were AWFUL. I had specifically mentioned and had in massive letters at the top of my notes about my Vaginismus (which - touch wood - now seems to have just about gone). Therefore would internal examainations PLEASE be kept to an aboslute minimum. I also remembering DH telling him this as well - so it wasn't like he just didn't bother reading my notes.

Anyhow, I had a LOT of internals each one resulting in me literally screaming in pain - as (fair enough they may have been nessecary) but he made no effort whatsoever to be a little more gentle (I know it was just him as the MW who was with me most of the night did one or two (after him) and it wasn't even half so bad). He also had the bl**dy cheek to tell me to stop screaming!!!

So - the short of this waffly story is.

DS1 - CS
DS2 - induced and heavily assisted delivery.

Am I totally mad to be considering having this one (presuming it's hopefully a 'sticky' baby - still early days!) at home????

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UCM · 13/10/2006 21:59

Shit sorry, meant to start a new thread.

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UCM · 13/10/2006 21:58

If I have an epidural during vaginal birth (hoping for vbac), do they have to use tools to get the baby out. I know this sounds ridiculous but it just struck me whilst reading the breath baby out thread that if I can't feel anything down below, I won't be able to push etc so how will baby come out???

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queenceleste · 02/10/2006 14:14

Given the national stats if you're youngish, and the preg has no significant complications - then you're hugely sane to consider it. although to succeed you need a midwife or midwife team behind you 100% - not always easy for NHS teams for all sorts of reasons. But I have friends who have had amazingly wonderful home births with independent midwives.

good luck with whatever is possible for you.

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charleymouse · 02/10/2006 13:59

HRH
I had a hb first time round and can definitely recommend it. I managed with warm baths, paracetomal and a TENS machine.
Talk it through with your midwife and book a home birth with the proviso you can change your mind as and when you like.
I think the fact you are in control and in your own surroundings make you a lot more relaxed. I think given your previous experience it is more likely to be relaxed at home than in hospital.
Look at the VBAC threads as I know nothing about that I am afraid.
Good luck whatever you decide.

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cat71 · 02/10/2006 13:40

Would definitely recommend a homebirth - dd2 born quickly and calmly in hired, heated birthing pool at home after dd1 long and stressful hospital birth. Also worth bearing in mind that you can ask not to be examined unless absolutely necessary, which I did second time around (didn't know I had the option first time!).

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Toady · 02/10/2006 13:30

Go on book a home birth, if you change your mind mid labour, ask to go to the hospital.

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 02/10/2006 13:09

sorry you had to go through that sleepfinder.


Have to say though - as each day goes by I find myself thinking even more that a HB is a good idea !

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sleepfinder · 30/09/2006 19:04

I had my first baby 4 wks ago. It was a completely normal, complication free pregnancy, for him and for me.

I had a hospital birth with a midwife. She didn't clamp my umbilical cord properly and it snapped back inside- causeing an enormous "bleed" - and they had to send for a doctor to stop it.

My GP told me that if I'd attempted a home birth without a doubt I would have bled to death - due to the error of the midwife and the inability to get to a doctor quick enough.

I'm clearly not dead, but very glad I never considered a home birth for this reason...

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Lulu68 · 30/09/2006 08:47

This website is exactly what you need , they have people on there who have had hbac's after 2, 3 and more sections. Also get letter templates from the Aims website ,(association for improvements in maternity services), they have a great letter to HOM (Head of Midwifery) informing her that you ARE going to have a homebirth and that you expect her to provide you with supportive midwives etc.

Also remember that you do not have to see a consultant, you are making an informed choice and do not need to do anything you don't want to do. Oh just join the vbac website and read the archives, there are loads of very informed ladies there who can help you.

You are definately not bonkers, more likely you are completely sane. I have had two hospital vbac's, the first using ventous but the second completely natural, if I had had less scaredy cat dh then the second one should have been an hbac .

Good luck to you - buy posting on here you have done yourself an enormous favour in getting all these links

Lucky you going through the birthing process again I would love to, it is the most amazing experience I have ever been through.

Sorry that this is so long but am passionate about it!! I didn't research for my first VBAC attempt and ended up being strapped to a bed all day, getting to 9 cms and then being butchered and cut open for no reason.................. two VBAC's after that have gone someway to healing the internal scars but it is my crusade to help anyone who shows an interest and point them in the right direction.

Lu

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 17:36

I think a big part of me thinks - well the I effectively had DS2 with no pain relief (99.99% of it didn't work) and I felt completely powerless to make things easier for myself. If I was at home I'd have more control........but you're right I'll talk to my MW at my booking in appointment - hopefully it's the same one I had when I was pg with DS2 - she was lovely.

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LadyTophamHatt · 29/09/2006 17:32

QoQ, ultimaltley the descision is yours, no one can say yes or no it's a good/bad idea.

Ds1 was born using ventouse after bloody hours of agony. There was no way on earth I was going to have Ds2 at home...I wnated drugs and lots of them as soon as humanly possible. He had other ideas though and was coming out whether I liked it or not ( I rememebr the paramedic saying "ok, don't push again until we tell you too" and thenthinking "F*cking hell...you what??...i;m not pushing!! this baby is just coming out whether you want it too or not!!")


Why don't you talk to your MW when you have your booking in appt? she'll be able to give you lots of help making the choice.

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 17:20

I don't know ...........I guess I needed some 'other' input before talking to anyone in RL.


Daft really it's such early days don't even know if this pg will get that far!!!

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FioFio · 29/09/2006 17:19

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 17:19

oh and my 'emergency' CS with DS1 took place over 4hrs after they'd decided he was "possibly" distressed..............and he showed no signs of distress in those 4hrs..

They didn't even give me 24hrs from my waters breaking either - at least with DS2 they gave me a few days.

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 17:17

LTH - thing is with DS2 it was a VBAC with me strapped to a monitor for 12hrs, flat on my back..........how many women successfully managed to push babies out in that position with no assistance???

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LadyTophamHatt · 29/09/2006 17:16

QoQ, I've had 2 HB both were very very quick.

This time I'm going to have another but the MW went through a big long list of stuff before agreeing to it.
I know I could have demanded one if she said it wasn't advisable but TBH (and IMO) in your shoes (with 1 CS and then lots of gadgets to getthe baby out) I'd want to be in hospital.

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 17:15

"private" support......are you kidding - and where would we find the money for that .

I've already ruled out a home waterbirth as the birthing pools I've seen are too expensive!

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 17:14

as I said that's 20 minutes sedate drive (in rush hour). DH easily does it in 10 minutes, and in a proper emergency ambulances take less than 5 minutes to get here!

Thing is none of hte complications I've had have been 'life threatening' (I'm still convinced that CS with DS1 was because they were really busy). And in reality very few things are that life threatening that a quick dash to the hospital would be 'too' late. Statistically speaking homebirths are safer than hopsital births.......

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FioFio · 29/09/2006 17:11

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sweeneytoddsmissus · 29/09/2006 17:08

sorry - only do hb if you are feeling empowered - i don't mean to sound like i am ordering everyone to have hb's!

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 17:06

well I did think about a hb for DS2 - but of course being a VBAC decided perhaps a hospital birth would have been better.....I wonder.....

I just love the thought of being in control, in place I'm comofortable with with all my 'things' around me.

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sweeneytoddsmissus · 29/09/2006 17:04

\link{http://www.homebirth.org.uk/}
can't do links but that is a great site for info

also entirely agree that you must do hb because you are feeling empowered and confident in your bodies ability to birth naturally - unfortunately in todays over medicalised society women don't even consider this as an option until a horrendous hospital exp makes them look for alternatives imo hb should be the norm and hospital the exception but we are a long way from there!

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 16:43

Fio - to drive sedately it's about 15-20 minutes (depending on time of day - DH can do it in 10 !).

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FioFio · 29/09/2006 16:41

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 29/09/2006 16:40

"On the other hand if you were afraid of being in labour away from doctors, it could make things worse."

Oh no - no fear of that .

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