Please can someone just lie to me...

[pocopearl]

...and tell me that real labour and childbirth is far less uncomfortable and painful than these braxton hicks?

They are getting more painful and uncomfortable as I'm getting closer to the due date.

[ohforfoxsake]

Braxton Hicks might occur if you are doing too much. Slow down.

Try hypnobirthing (someone on here gave me a CD - very straightforward). Listened to it as i went to sleep each night. Helped a lot during labour.

DD popped out very quickly, so much so the cup of tea DH made for me and the MWs when they got here was still warm enough to drink. No tearing.

(I will fail to mention she is DC4, was 2 weeks late and I had two weeks of slow stop-start labour).

Honestly. That birth was a piece of piss.

[worsestershiresauce]

Personally I think it helps to be a bit scared before hand as when it actually happens you'll think 'oh, not as bad as I thought...' Worked for me anyway.

[firesideskirt]

my labours have been agonisingly painful!
BUT very fast and uncomplicated. No complaints here. And other than a wee bit of discomfort (stitches etc), the pain stops when the bubba is out.

[igirisu]

Labour is painful but not as painful as the niggles of an unpleasant pregnancy or just the general waiting to meet your child, a day after giving birth i felt traumatised, a week on i was already planning my second so you forget the pain x

[jammiedonut]

'gruelling' is the word I'd use to describe labour. It was tough, but not overly painful for me at least (although there are no words to describe crowning!). Look at it as a marathon - hard, relentless, exhausting and, at times, you'll want to give up. But the sense of achievement and surge of happy hormones (not to mention the beautiful baby at the end!) are all worth it. The biggest thing for me was the fact that I had no idea how the pain would feel, would it be like a cramp for example? But once I felt that first big contraction the fear sort of went away. Yes, it was painful, but I knew what to expect from then on with each contraction, and ultimately I knew that the pain would end, even if it did take 23 bloody hours!
Never underestimate the value of Positive Mental Attitude, even in the face of complications, you will get through it!

[TantrumsandBananas]

Much better and lovely descriptions above than I will give.

I ended up having a slow labour that didn't progress, emergency c-section in the end.

I was 14 day overdue.

I spent alot of my pregnancy worrying about giving birth, in the end, I just wanted her OUT.

[MadeOfStarDust]

I'm a complete scaredy cat - with a VERY low pain threshold - if it was THAT bad I'd have stopped at one....

but I DID IT TWICE... some people even do it more often....

[DawnOfTheDee]

You know what I liked about labour - being the centre of attention.

It was fab. It was a big fat (literally) DawnOfTheDee fest when everyone had to

a) be nice to me
b) do what I said
c) give me drugs when I demanded them

and at the end I got a big fat squishy baby.

Best. Day. Ever.

[KFFOREVER]

Im also in favour of epidurals.

Looking back i focused way too much on child birth when the hardest bit was coming home with the baby. Sleep deprivation, after pains, breastfeeding and endless visitors were a lot harder to deal with than giving birth. You will be fine

[AnathemaDevice]

I've had 3 babies in just under 4 years, so it can't be that bad.

I've been in labour for a total of 23 hours altogether, and only the last 15 minutes of DS2's birth was awful (and that was only because he had his hand on his chin as he emerged). The rest of it was uncomfortable and painful, but really not that bad.

Try not to panic, and ask for gas and air as soon as you can-great stuff! It doesn't stop it hurting, but it stops you caring that it hurts.

[teabagpleb]

My SIL had bad BH and says labour was much less bad.
I never had BH at all - thought I did eventually but was just slow labour...

While a 'whatever' mindset might help, some babies need more help than others - see how it goes but be prepared to make use of 21st Century healthcare if necessary.

[ZingWidge]

gallic

I was fully dilated and ready to push with DD (6th child) when all the pain went away!

I panicked. I did not want to push, I was so afraid of the pain coming back!
I folded my arms and said I'm not pushing, I want a C-section!
all the faces went

It was like a standoff between the baddies & goodies in a Western!
after a 5 minute "argument" I thought I'd better push, I was worried MW would slap me!

[ZingWidge]

ok, I'll try!

labour is painless
giving birth is easy.
you won't feel a thing.
baby will be out with 3 sneezes.
baby will feed 3 hourly during the day, but sleep 8 hours every night.
baby will never cry, only cough lightly when hungry, tired, hot, cold, wet, bored, scared.

You will be fresh as a daisy, calm and laid back and able to keep the house tidy, cook a 3 course meal every night and happily entertain the endless stream of well wishers.

don't you worry your pretty little head. it's nothing, really...

how did I do? did you believe a word I said?

[ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged]

One of my friends told me 'it smarts a bit'

Yeah it does, but you get a BABY at the end of it.

[VisualiseAHorse]

Yup, you'll either go all 'internal' and only be able to focus on you, or you'll go 'fuck it, I'm going home'.

It doesn't hurt honest. It's just like stubbing your toe except you get a little bundle of squashiness to hug after.

[Badgerwife]

Epidurals are science's gift to women. Abject begging is completely acceptable in the circumstances and you will want to kiss the anaesthetist afterwards.

[ChickenLickenSticken]

That bit where you don't feel like you can't/won't do anymore means you're at transition. Which generally means you're pretty close to meeting your bubba.

I too am a wimp and I did it with no gas and air or anything! So if I can, anyone can. I'm sure some of it is mindset, and I would definitely recommend hypno birthing to anyone feeling a bit worried. I really bought into the whole concept, although I didn't really use the techniques, and it taught me that it would all be just fine. And it was!

[gallicgirl]

Yup, that's the moment.
I had a home birth and there was a moment when I stood up, said I wasn't doing it anymore and wanted everyone to go home. Think that was when my gas and air was removed to focus my attention.

[LucyBabs]

Excellent description gallicgirl

I laughed at the you'll go a bit mad

Reminded me of my labour on youngest dc.

I clamped my legs shut telling the midwife to get the fuck away from me I wasn't pushing the damn baby out.

She grabbed my face with both her hands and through gritted teeth told me to cop on and get the job done!

I was shocked at the time but Thank God for her she was brilliant.

[TanglednotTamed]

With real labour, you can keep on thinking that every contraction is another one gone, and another step closer to it being done. It feels purposeful in a way that BH doesn't. Also, I found that endorphins flowed, providing a type of pain relief. That didn't happen with BH.

[elfycat]

BH are just a nuisance, real labour is for a purpose and with a goal in sight after which the pain goes away.

I won't say my 2 labours didn't hurt but it wasn't the same as breaking a bone, for example. And it wasn't a pain, more of a discomfort. Quite a big discomfort at times and take the drugs

I was quite cheerful as they took me up to labour ward, so much so the delivery midwife was having a quiet word with the ward midwife about wasting her time - I only had three more contractions before DD1 appeared. The reason I was cheerful was that I was 10cm and getting on with it. They'd suggested that I might need to be induced the following day which I had hoped to avoid, and I had.

I did it again less than 2 years later so it couldn't have been bad as I can be a bit of a wimp.

[RoooneyMara]

Epidurals are GREAT.

[StyleManual]

My childbirth philosophy is this: It's the biggest, most important day of your life so it's going to be tough. In the olden days men had to go off exploring and climbing mountains etc to try prove themselves as men. Women don't need to do that because we have childbirth to got through.

Also, those hormones are mental. I had a 2nd degree tear and I remember feeling it go. I thought I had pooed myself. Imagine your bits bursting open and mistaking it for a poo...that's how mad those hormones are. You go into a weird coping state and your body is just flooded with pain killing hormones.

I enjoyed giving birth but it's hard. A few weeks after having DD I watched a programme about John Bishop doing that sport relief challenge where he cycled from Paris then rowed the channel and then ran to London. I really thought that looked easy compared to giving birth and looking after a newborn!

[bumpybecky]

BH are worse if you're dehydrated, try having a big glass of water and see if it helps :)