10 yo w (mild) OCD - how to help?

[Lindtnotlint]

Hello!

10yo DD has some sort of OCD. Symptoms include an exceptionally tidy room that has to be “just so”; a set of bedtime compulsions like “tap the pillow five times”; an unusual intense focus on list-making and ticking-off things; a little bit of stuff on clothes/sensory (though used to be much worse when young); a need to tidy her drawers in a constant way; a need to hand her dressing gown in a very particular way.

None of this is particularly awful - she is happy, doing well at school etc. Bit more anxious than other kids her age perhaps but nothing out of the normal range. However, it is very obviously an “actual thing” - she has a condition, even if it is not currently damaging. I am worried about how this story is going to play out as she gets older - eg when exam stress or social stress intensifies at secondary school.

I bought her a book about it which she isn’t v keen to engage with (she acknowledges she can be weird about this stuff but doesn’t like to discuss it) and we do our best not to support/indulge the obsessions (which seems to be the advice). What else can/should I do? Should I seek some low key therapy/CBT? I am a bit reluctant to as everything is “fine” but I don’t want to be the parent who waits for a mental health/anxiety crisis before helping.

thoughts from those who have dealt with similar would be super. Recommendations for people would be helpful if poss (we are in London)

thank you!

My son is 11 and I’ve had similar worries about him in the past.
I went and spoke to our GP about it in 2019 (ish) mainly for reassurance and to make sure I wasn’t ‘ignoring’ something important. OCD is in our family so I think that made me think/worry more about it.
The doctor was amazing. He reassured me a lot and basically said that as long as my son seemed happy and he wasn’t doing anything dangerous then to just keep an eye on things. After our chat, the GP said they record the chat quite informally because if my son ever wanted to go into the armed forces (don’t think he will!) then a record of anything that classes as mental illness, even as a child, can complicate things. Not sure how true that is.
This was all a few years ago and my son still has a few routines, tend to be worse/more noticeable when he’s tired. But he’s happy, does really well at school, very sociable etc etc so I just look at these things as a part of his personality if that makes sense. Obviously, I’d think again and get help if he was unhappy. One of the things that has always made it worse is me drawing attention to what he’s doing. That used to upset him because he thought I was telling him off. I find it hard (especially when I’m tired) to ignore some of the routines but that definitely seems to help. If that makes sense?
Sorry for the long post!

My DD has OCD and showed signs from about 8. I spoke to our GP about it and he said similar to @SweeeetPea ‘s GP. He said provided it wasn’t affecting her day to day life too much we should do nothing. I felt a bit fobbed off at the time, but with the benefit of hindsight he’s probably right.
DD had various rituals that she had to complete - and if she did it ‘wrong’ she’d start again. She certainly never had any sort of tidy or cleaning rituals. Her bedroom was always a mess and her student flat was a pigsty.
She did have some other odd behaviours. Sensory issues with clothes. And certain noises really irritate her.
She’s an adult now and I don’t see much evidence that she’s still doing anything too out of the ordinary. But I do keep an eye on the situation as two of her father’s relatives have been quite severely impacted by it.

Has your child actually been diagnosed or are you assuming based on their behaviours?
I’d definitely speak to a GP. My DD was diagnosed with OCD last year.DD has been having CBT since January. It turned out that alongside the behaviour I had noticed she was having some pretty intense obsessive thoughts that she hadn’t disclosed to me and her therapy is working on these initially.

She hasn’t been diagnosed by anybody professional (we haven’t seen anybody) but she is pretty “textbook” so I am reasonably confident. It’s strange to say that something is definitely “real” while also being relatively “minor”. But that’s how it is….

intetesting that GPS say let it go - I am sure I would get same if I went to mine. I just have this niggling doubt that helping her now while things are relatively ok and straightforward might be easier than helping later in more of a “crisis”. It’s definitely something that peaks when she is stressed.

Can I ask which book you have bought? The “what to do when” books are really good and there is one called “what to do when your brain gets stuck”. The way they are written makes them quite accessible to kids.