school trip worry

[pushedtothepoint]

DS (4) has come home with a letter about a school trip. Now, whilst I'm very happy for him to go on the trip, I'm not at all happy about him going on the coach/bus to get there.

He's only just turned from extended rear-facing; the bus only has lap belts and I feel very uncomfortable with him travelling in such an unsafe way.

I've had a bad car crash in the past and I know how bad lap belts are. They wouldn't protect him at all and could actually cause lots of internal damage.

We don't go on buses/take taxis - bottom line as far as I'm concerned is that if he can't be in his high-backed booster, then he doesn't go in the vehicle in question.

So... What do I do? His high-backed booster won't fit, or even work, in the coach. I hate backless boosters with a passion. I could drive him there, but I'm concerned other kids would comment on why he wasn't on the bus.

But then again - he's 4 and pretty oblivious to everything. He lives in his own little bubble and I don't think that Mummy driving him there would register as being odd in his head. I don't really want to be labelled as 'that overprotective mother' but the whole thing is making me very anxious and I'm really not happy. If the coach had three-point harnesses then I'd be a lot happier.

So. What on earth do I do?

[Trumpton]

If you can drive him yourself then that's the best option. My DGS is still rear facing and is 5.9 ( quite little tho).my daughter or I drive him on school trips as neither of us are happy with minibus .
Make it clear to the school that you are not joining in on the activity (unless they want you to) but are just the driver.

[pushedtothepoint]

Thank you for making me not feel like an overprotective loon! I'm really unhappy about it but most people I know, that I've spoken to, think I'm being silly. But, saying that, these are mostly people who have turned their children round to FF at the earliest stage possible, so they just don't understand why I'm concerned.

[AliceMum09]

I totally get where you are coming from. My daughter is 4 (starts school this September) and after half term her pre-school are having a trip to a local children's farm park, travelling on a coach for 3/4 hour, part of it on the motorway.

I'm driving my daughter, she's not going on the coach. The issue I have is that she's very petite, she weighs 13.5kgs so even though the coach has 3-point seatbelts it's pointless me sending a high backed booster for her to use as legally she's not heavy enough to use one! Plus she has an ERF seat in our car, so the thought of her being forward facing, even if she were the 15kgs minimum for a high backed booster, is not something I'm comfortable with either.

[pushedtothepoint]

I'm still getting my head around him being in a FF seat. I hate it, but he's just too tall for any ERF now, so I have no choice. But the whole coach thing makes me very nervous and unhappy. It's just not what I deem as being an acceptable level of safety.

[BobsYourAuntiesLiveInLover]

I think YABVU.

How do you propose the school take all of the children on the trip if you feel the coach is unsafe? The school will have risk assessed the travel options and have decided that this is safest.

[DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep]

I don't think it's unreasonable. I do let my daughter go on the coach for the (mostly short) school trips they've done and she's 5 (Sept birthday). She only turned out of her ERF seat as she started school, at her insistent request. She is also tall for her age, now wearing age 6-7 trousers and has done for a while, and weighs 19kg. I just have to not contemplate a crash on a school trip and that's how I cope with it. If you can drive her though, I don't see why not. (i didn't as I also have 4 year old twins and driving an hour to the zoo, when they were still 3.5 actually, then taking them home to not intrude on her trip seemed too hard on them.

Incidentally, one of the dts is very tall, my dh is 6'4", he definitely takes after him, and as he was recently crying over sore legs on a journey he may not make it to 5 ERF like his sister did- so I'm obviously more flexible now...

[Jojay]

I work in a school and a couple of parents choose to drive their children on trips. It's no big deal, honestly. No one will think you're precious or odd, just do what you think is best