tomorrow on the matthew wright show, bottle feeding guilt

[alright]

last bit of the show promoting tomorrows he says "are all these pro breastfeeding campaigns making mothers who bottle feed feel guilty" we discuss this tomorrow.

[Xai]

I wanted to bf ds1 but the area I was living in had a shocking support system. I got to 5 days and the mw weighed ds and told me that as he'd lost over his 10% it meant my milk hadn't come in and I would have to give him a bottle if I didn't want him to starve! As a first timer I foolishly took her advice, although I always felt I might have been able to do it had I had better support. We moved soon afterwards and I now have a ds2 who I am (so far) bfing very sucessfully. I had the same issue with him and weigh loss to start with, but ff wasn't even hinted at this time round and I simply visited the mw every other day until we were sure we'd got it right.

I didn't see the MW show about this but it sounds like the typical sort of self righteous bollocks he usually spouts. How the hell is the message going to get across and the trends changed with idiots like him (who clearly don't know what they're talking about) throwing false information into the mix. I know from my first experience it's hard enough to bf even when you want to, never mind educating the people who don't bf because they aren't aware of all the correct information!

[tiktok]

Custardo - I have been away from the computer for a couple of days, and I see you are accusing me of piling on the guilt - eh? How?

And as for stress - there is no accounting for individual experience, but there is no evidence that 'constant stress' interferes with milk supply, and the evidence is that it doesn't, and it would make no sense if it did, physiologically.

[MARGOsBeenPlayingWithMyNooNoo]

oh the complaint was because he used the term coffin dodgers

[milkgoddessmakesthefinestmilk]

shame you didnt get on margo.

tinks i didnt see the complaint either

[MARGOsBeenPlayingWithMyNooNoo]

I phoned yesterday but wasn't used. They said there was a lot of calls about this.

[TinkerbellesMum]

Official Facebook Group

I did a Google search but couldn't find anything. I hope he is sitting in a cell come Monday mwahaha

[lackaDAISYcal]

there was some mention of something on radio 1 this morning; one of the songs they played was "The Right Stuff" by New Kids on the BLock, and they remarked that the song had been chosen before they saw this mornings news, but nothing further. I assume they were referring to the complaints about the show yesterday!

I've had a look at the papers, but can't find anything.

[TinkerbellesMum]

Did anyone see what the complaint was about? I was on the phone and all I heard was him saying "I'm not going to appologise because I don't think I was wrong"

I'm really angry about this episode too now!

[TinkerbellesMum]

WTF????????

I think I need to stop watching this show!

[TinkerbellesMum]

I just remembered something that stupid GP said! Biggins asked if BFing hurt and she listed all the most painful things like they're normal! She didn't even say that it's a sign of something being wrong (isn't that what all pain is supposed to be anyway Mrs GP?) and that they are easily fixed or that not everyone gets pain.

[missorinoco]

ah, now it makes sense, thankyou suzi2. (thought it was another version of bitchy, and couldn't work out how that fitted in.)

[pinata]

matthew wright is a complete arrogant twat. Of course he'd be pro formula, as he is quite clearly the kind of man who thinks the primary purpose of boobs is to make men happy, bf is just a secondary unimportant function.

watching this morning's show made me angry, depsite the fact i am one of the people who is "made to feel bad" by bf ads

the fact is, i COULD have bf, but a combination of being badly prepared ("bf? OF COURSE i'll be able to do THAT. That's the least of my worries"), a traumatic birth and huge pain without any idea of where to get support made me stop

I think getting and keeping bf visible and making it fully accpeted is hugely important. Yes, i feel bad - but so what? If me feeling bad = more mothers givng bf a go who otherwise wouldn't have it is surely worth it?

[wonderstuff]

Yes that i am a journalist line was awful, journalist, not scientist, its not surveys its scientific research.. I really didn't understand what he wanted done, was the suggestion to stop breast is best campaim?

[ChocolateHobnob]

He really really wound me up; found myself furious with him and his stupid 'I am a journalist and I can see that surveys showing breast is best aren't empirically sound'. Yeah, right. And the comment about sticky yucky milk!!!

Also the whole thing about women being pressured by midwives to bf. He needs to come here - in my hospital, they were handing out bottles of Cow and Gate before, rather than when, being asked to. Indeed I suspected they were secret agents of Cow and Gate...

[BouncingTurtle]

I'm so glad I didn't watch this, sounds like it was as bad as i thought would be.

Itwasntme - do NOT feel guilty!! You did a wonderful job, you tried your very hardest and didn't work for you. No-one is saying that everyone can breastfeed, just that it is a much smaller percentage than MW was trying to make out.

(BTW I'm at Tink's mum quoting me!

[suzi2]

"bitty" is a phrase that comes from a Little Britain (TV comedy) sketch. Basically a grown man is out with his girlfriend and parents for a meal to discuss their mariage (or some similar situation, different each episode) and the man starts hassling his mother for "bitty". She then breastfeeds him.

[missorinoco]

sorry, what is "bitty"?

[suzi2]

I watched it. It wasn't very balanced at all. There really wasn't much support for the pro breastfeeding adverts. I was actually a little confused as to who the bf mum was too.

I can't say I was a huge fan of Matthew Wright, but I think he was particularly rude in this piece.

They certainly made it look as though a lot of women couldn't breastfeed when we all know on here that isn't the case. They also made it seem like an impossible struggle. Which for many it is, but for many it isn't.

What they failed to address is breastfeeding promotion and it's purpose. They failed to mention the importance of breastfeeding support from professionals, proper professionals, not MWs and HVs with limited or no training.

I really don't think that most formula feeders, who may or may not feel guilty when they see adverts for BF, would want them taken off the air. I think most people I know who tried BF and switched to formula would rather than that bf message was 'out there' so that it was more normal and there was more support for women like them who just couldn't manage for whatever reason.

[fabsmum]

If you watch the programme without an agenda then I think you come away thinking that they gave both sides of the story.

No - this is just wrong.

It was a VERY unbalanced programme.

"They gave accurate statistics"

They mentioned at the outset that 98% of women can breastfeed, but completely failed to mention the more important fact, which is that 90% of women in the UK who stop breastfeeding before 6 months would have liked to have breastfed longer. In other words - they completely failed to point out that there is a MASSIVE problem with breastfeeding support in this country. That's the real story.

"they had both a formula feeding and a breastfeeding mother contribute. they showed a pro breastfeeding ad. they had a doctor on to give advice."

Yes - unfortunately MW spent the entire feature making stupid, sniping comments, constantly insinuating that there a lack of empirical evidence that breastfeeding is best for babies, rolling his eyes about the ban on infant formula advertising without giving anyone the chance to address the issues this raises. And WHY have a GP on to talk about breastfeeding - they're hardly the experts on this subject are they? Why didn't they have someone on the show who was a breastfeeding expert? The probreastfeeding ad was used to make a critical point about breastfeeding promotion. The breastfeeding mum was inarticulate and was BOTTLEFEEDING!

"I think the fact that you can't promote formula is an important issue. Why shouldn't it be discussed on a debate style programme? "

Yes - it is. If he was going to raise this issue he should have given someone knowledgeable on the subject a chance to challenge his views, but he didn't. His comments throughout the programme served to reinforce people's misunderstanding of this topic.

[hunkermunker]

[TinkerbellesMum]

Thank you.

Funnily enough it's a lot of guilt that kept me going. I felt I had let her down by a. going into prem labour (I know I couldn't control that, but it was linked to my last prem labour) and b. because I didn't make a fuss about it till it was late (same as the first which is why I feel guilt over a.) - I didn't want to let her down by letting her stay on formula. Fortunately though I was in a really good supportive hospital that didn't let mums go home unable to breastfeed and then sent neonatal MWs to their home three times a week who are wonderfully supportive. In the hospital they praised every drop of milk and made a thing about giving it to her so I never felt like it wasn't good enough.

[BabiesEverywhere]

TinkerbellesMum, Flipping heck, that is a long time...respect for you pumping and nursing all that time before you could see the milk.

[wonderstuff]

Also I remember they found that genetics were involved, not everyone's iq is raised by bf, only the 90% of people who have this gene. I would be interested to find out more about the obesity research, surely that must be more socio-economic??