Overweight 9 month old baby

[rab3331]

Our foster baby came to us for the second time a week ago weighing 10.4 kilos. Her grandmother who had been looking after her for two months is morbidly obese as well as not being able to cope. The problem I now have is that bubs is too heavy to carry for more than a few yards unless I use both arms which means I then can’t carry anything else. Even a handbag and change bag over my shoulder becomes too much. Getting her into the car seat is a challenge and I wonder how long my back is going to hold out. If I had been her birth mum then I would have developed muscles as she grew (but then if I had been her birth Mum I expect she wouldn’t be overweight).
Question is, does anyone know a safe diet I can put her on? She loves her Formula which I have been diluting. I have also given her diluted fresh juice as she doesn’t like water and a mashed banana for breakfast, spaghetti hoops and mash for lunch (small portion) and small jar of apple and oatmeal for supper. She doesn’t seemed to have been given much in the way of solids so the usual apple pieces, carrot sticks are probably over ambitious at this stage.
Any tips welcome!

[tiktok]

OP - please come back and explain what hep and support you are getting from the social and family services in your area. Are you sharing your ideas about appropriate diet with them? Aus services are normally very good and supportive, from what I know, and no one would be approved as a foster carer without knowledge of a healthy diet,, and supervision if the baby has particular dietary needs.

Consensus here is pretty unanimous - the food you are giving her is not suitable, and formula should never be diluted. It's not a question of maths over the whole day, and it's not a question of GPs thinking people are stupid. It's a question of the volume of nutrients and water at any one time.

Quit the defensiveness, and get some support from people whose job it is to support you.

[RandomMess]

Yes hippy chick was great so long as you have hips

[Di11y]

I have a hippy chick hip support. Like a solid bum bag it helps take the baby's weight so you only have to hold them stable. You can also get them with straps.

Can't comment on the formula but 9mo is definitely park chubb before they start moving.

[RandomMess]

Not going to comment on diet etc but I had 2 huge babies - very tall and therefore 98th centile for weight And height. I used the pushchair a lot... carried baby to car then out in infant car seat - often put stuff in car the night before/when baby sleeping etc. The baby car seat just lived in the car from when they were 6 months or so old as I couldn't lift them in it.

It was wonderful when DC4 was only 25th centile for weight by a year old as I could still easily carry her!

As soon as they were standing and climbing I used to let them climb into their own car seats but you're a long way from that time.

[furandchandeliers]

Please don't dilute her formula.

She doesn't need to go in a diet just feed her healthily, you don't seem to understand what healthy is, the days food you described sounds shot tbh. If you're fostering her surely you get help with this sort of thing? Or you're expected to know it anyway?

[PinkAvocado]

I find it worrying that you have not had the training or support to know how to feed this baby. As everyone has said, it is dangerous to dilute formula and one pp explained why very clearly. Please speak to the baby’s GP (not your husband) to get some advice.

[DickTERFin]

Don't dilute the formula! That is so dangerous. Also, don't put her on a low fat diet. Babies need a good amount of fat in their diet for general growth (especially skin) and brain development. In fact don't put her on any kind of diet, it is not appropriate for an infant - just feed her nutritious whole foods and the weight will sort itself out.

Sugar on the other hand is unnecessary and you could ditch refined carbs if there are concerns about her blood sugars . So substitute white carbs with small portions of wholewheat/brown carbs and make sure she is getting a good amount of protein and veg to fill her up. Sweet potato toast is easy in the morning (just slice a sweet potato and pop it in the toaster - add a little butter/nut butter/hummus for a well rounded breakfast) and she should be able to feed herself with it. Encouraging self feeding helps to reduce "overeating" because it's quite a lot of effort for them and so they are more likely to stop once satiated.

As for you back. It's not rocket science, you need to do some strengthening exercise. YouTube is your friend. There are a plethora of pilates/yoga/strengthening vids that you can do to build your core and arm muscles... or do a plank challenge.

[Windydayz]

Weight is normal. My 5mo is 19lb. Yes he is heavy but if i need to carry something else i dont carry him as well.

Do not dilute formula. Milk is one of the most important things in their diet at this age. My ds refused to drink water until way after 1yo. I wasnt worried as he was having milk and fresh fruit and veg like water melon when it was hot. I still offer a cup of water at every feed though. Dont let refusal put you off.

There is too much sugar in the diet so maybe swap for some veggies.

[Fromage]

You sound woefully uniformed about babies in general, for a foster carer. Are you a trained, approved one, or is this a kinship fostering?

I can't believe someone trained and informed, would give spaghetti hoops to a 9 month old baby, for a start, and watering down formula is more complicated than simple maths - you are messing with the balance of nutrients in the milk.

Also, what kind of numpty can't think of buying a sling?!

[DuchyDuke]

OP have you spoken to a GP about health / diet advice? Reason I ask is that according to the vic.gov.au website, 10kg at 9 months is only within the 95 percentile in terms of baby growth. So NO doctor would have told you to put the baby on a diet. Link is below.

OP I think you should contact whoever arranged the fostering relationship and tell them you don’t have the first idea how to care for a baby, and that you also have incredibly weak arms and so can’t carry her. (Being unable to carry a 10kg baby when you don’t have disabilities or health conditions to explain it, is ridiculous by the way).

www.education.vic.gov.au/Documents/childhood/parents/mch/mchgrowthboy24mths.pdf

[neonyellowshoes]

She's deleted it, how odd

[neonyellowshoes]

Not nasty, just trying to justify this madness.

I'll post it here in a bit

[LoveProsecco]

[Fatted]

Jesus, my two were both a similar weight around that age. Both were 8 and 9lbs at birth. They have always been very tall boys and neither were considered to be overweight. They have always been a healthy weight and regulate their own appetite.

It's normal for babies to pack on a bit of weight at this age and then they usually lose it when they start moving more. I wouldn't put him on a diet or water down his formula. Feed him healthy foods and let him regulate his own appetite.

[mummabearfoyrbabybears]

Did anyone else who pointed out OPs failing get a nasty PM??

[Kardashianlove]

I would still give her apple pieces, carrot sticks, etc, she will soon get used to them. Also, give her a whole banana or chopped up banana instead of mashed. It will take her longer to eat so she will probably feel fuller. I wouldn’t be spoon feeding her anything if you are concerned over her weight, I would do baby led weaning style, keep offering her a variety of healthy foods-peas, steamed broccoli, green beans, hummus on toast, avacado, etc.

Please stop giving her tinned hoops, no 9 month old needs these.

Can you get a swivel car seat to make it easier to put her/in out the car. Put her in first then go back for your bags. Get a sling / use the pram. I don’t think most people try to carry a baby plus handbag/change bag for any distance do they?!

[Gileswithachainsaw]

Do not dilute the formula. That's dangerous.

The vitamins minerals fat etc are all formulated for the directions given. Adding more or less water messes it up and if they leave bottles they miss out on vital nutrients.

You need to feed proper food not tinned and jarred stuff.

Takes minutes to steam veg.

[Eledamorena]

www.hippychick.com/products/hippychick-hipseat?v=19&gclid=Cj0KCQjw0a7YBRDnARIsAJgsF3NLMayddWFa7BB_vVSnHJKrhFQmX9lGC9ML2a2tAKcnm7lYwPbsY7oaAlMDEALw_wcB


Sorry I don't know how to link properly but have you considered something like this? It's a sort of hip carrier that provides you with a bit of support when carrying a baby/toddler so would perhaps free up your other hand, at least for short periods. One of the twin mums near me manages to carry both babies (who look about 1 year old) for short distances by having one on a hip carrier and the other in her other arm. Quite impressive skills! But if she can do that maybe this would work for you?

[ProjectInsanity]

What about fruit infusions (like tea, but the ones without the tea in) instead of juice. Would that not be better for her teeth, but maybe more acceptable as not plain water?

[Jenala]

The food you're giving her won't be helping, which multiple people have said but you are not responding to this.

Plenty of soft steamed veg, scrambled egg, fish and meat where possible. As little processed food as possible.

Why dilute the formula so it's the equivalent amounts that milk and water? Why not give them separately. Just fewer bottles of formula.

This is really quite bizarre.

[Eledamorena]

I'm afraid I can't help with much advice, though I agree with PPs about possibly changing some of your current foods eg spaghetti hoops for less processed alternatives. BUT - you have taken on a baby who may well refuse healthier options and needs weaning onto them slowly, which I am sure you aim to do. I would never give diluted juice to a baby but as you say, this is a means to an end, as you are aiming to get her onto water. Keep going with this. As others have said, I do think babies tend to even out as they grow - my first seems to get a bit tubby then 'stretch out' a bit as she grows, and she's now 3.5 and this still seems to be a pattern. The amount she eats also seems to vary and she seems to eat loads more when she's having a growth spurt.

You do, however, have my sympathy regarding the difficulties of carrying a heavy baby - my son is almost 9 months and weighs more than your foster daughter! I have obviously got used to him as he grows but the difference between carrying him around and carrying my first is huge (and she was never a small baby).I don't think he's particularly overweight, just a bit of a beast! I expect things will even out once he starts walking.

I try to carry him as little as possible, which is a different approach for me as I wore my first regularly til she was about 15 months old. No way my back would survive that with this one! We are also encouraging lots of floor time/crawling/standing up holding onto our legs/the sofa in the hope he might walk sooner rather than later.... because even things I did easily with my first like carry her from the car into nursery or to a supermarket trolley before she could walk, I will struggle to do with my son.

Best of luck OP, and you deserve praise and support for taking in a foster child.

[TheRealMotherGoose]

Don't dilute her formula, it is still her main source of nutrition and it is dangerous for you to do this.

You shouldn't be giving her spaghetti hoops :-( they are highly processed and contain high levels of salt and sugar.

Ideally not mashed potato either.

Try mashed pureed carrot, mashed avocado, mashed peas, pears, apple puree. Plain canellini beans, butter beans, chickpeas. Pieces of cooked broccoli. Pieces of cucumber.

I kind of hope you are a troll because this makes me so sad.

I am glad you are getting her back on water rather than juice, which is awful for teeth and should never be given to babies or children.

[ProjectInsanity]

My DS was also his heaviest around this age, just before he started moving. If you don't want a full sling you can get some which are side-carry slings, so you can carry him on your hip but it spreads the weight and you just need one arm to hold on to him.

Lose the processed food. There's nothing wrong with offering cooked broccoli florets or carrot sticks at this age. There's loads of baby recipe books for finger foods. Some don't need food mashed at this age, some will only eat mashed. I had one of each. Weight alone is a bit of a red herring at this age, you need to look at height percentile and weight percentile (and take into account the parent's height).

[RideOn]

You don’t put a baby on a weight loss diet ever.

You give them formula undiluted at amount recommended usually in 3 bottles, then 3 meals a day of things like porridge. Mashed veg with cheese. Slices boiled egg and toast, followed by a (non diet) low sugar yoghurt.

In between you could give some breadsticks or fruit if there was a longish gap between meals.

You don’t feed a baby spaghetti hoops and of course they don’t “like” water but keep on offering and they will get used to it. Don’t give them juice at this age.

9 months is peak “chubby” in my family and when they get active they slim out.

I think you should be aiming for them to grow into their weight. I see you have used a sling, also a buggy, there is no need to carry them long distances if your back can’t take it.

Pushing a buggy with a good posture is supposed to be good for your core muscles. So maybe get out and do more walking. Think positively every time you get the chance to do this workout, this baby is going to get you stronger!

[Branleuse]

i dont think its wise to put such a young baby on a diet. My second baby easily weighed that at that age, but he was 4.5kg at birth. Hes now a very slim 11 year old.
Just feed her normally, it will balance out when she becomes mobile