Webchat with Professor Tanya Byron: Tuesday 8 July, 1-2pm.

[RachelMumsnet]

Professor Tanya Byron will be joining us for a webchat at 1pm on Tuesday 8 July. Tanya is a practicing consultant in child and adolescent mental health and author of several books including her latest, The Skeleton Cupboard, our June non-fiction book of the month.

The Skeleton Cupboard is Professor Tanya Byron's fascinating account of her years training as a clinical psychologist. The Skeleton Cupboard recounts the period when she found herself in the toughest placements of her career. Through the eyes of her naive and inexperienced younger self, Tanya shares remarkable stories of the people who came to her for help with a multitude of difficulties. The patients she sees suffer from loneliness, anorexia and anxiety, as well as severe cases of dementia and a psychopath with a knife.

Find out more about the book, read an extract here

Come and chat to Tanya about her experiences training and working as a psychologist, her book or tap into her expertise and ask her a question about any psychological and emotional issues that may be affecting you or your family.

[MrsRedWhite214]

The skeleton cupboard takes you on the journey of qualifying as a clinical psychologist. Tanya Byron talks through each of her placements in different areas of mental health and brings an understanding of how the psychologist can feel in these situations. It is a fiction book based on her experiences in training, but straddles the fiction/non-fiction boundary well. It doesn't read like a story but you also don't get bogged down in facts.

It is a very easy book to read. She doesn't complicate the cases and is honest about how she dealt with the situations. Her book manages to humanise the psychologist as well as the patients.

I would recommend this to anyone with an interest in mental health, or becoming a mental health practitioner. I liked the way she explored the boundary between personal and professional opinion and the necessity to deal with those feelings properly.

[mumtooneson]

Thanks for the free copy. I enjoyed the book and the insights into the different case strategies. I'm not entirely sure who the target audience is as I did find the blend of fictional cases and some personal input a bit of a mishmash.

[Cakecrumbsinmybra]

Still working on on free copy but will be posting my thoughts soon!

[GretchenWiener]

I dont think a psychologist knows about mortgages, particularly

[MrsRedWhite214]

I haven't managed to finish this yet, I'm hoping to get a bit more time to read soon

[JugglingFromHereToThere]

I think that's probably right blue but will the 4 children stay living with you, or will (his) three move out with him?

[blue3333]

hi, question new to this. I live in a house its mine totally, i pay the mort, the deeds are in my name. my partner now my ex has three kids living with me and mine one child. I have seen a lawyer & he says I dont need to do anything about it, you can ask him to leave. he is unemployed. I pay for the food for all. the bills were in his name but as he had no money I moved them to me. is is really ture I just ask him to leave?

[Goldmandra]

Thank you

[Lesuffolkandnorfolk]

I will make a note of it Goldmandra

[Goldmandra]

I'd love it if you could get her to answer my question from upthread as she chose not to in the webchat.

On the House of Tiny Tearaways you were seen to advise that children with food issues sat at the table and were put under powerful pressure to get them to eat, then heaping praise upon them when they eventually did so.

The most common advice for parents of fussy eaters is to make the food available by putting in front of them, leaving them to eat it whatever they choose, then taking away what is left without comment. The reason behind this being that they need to feel in control in order that they can choose to eat and have a healthy and positive relationship with food. If they sense a power struggle, they will eat less. I'm also aware of studies that concluded that children were less likely to choose activities if they had been rewarded for them in the past so this seems to make sense.

How can parents know when to take the generally advised approach of leaving the child to choose freely from a healthy balanced diet that is made available to them and when they should be taking a more active approach and insisting that the child puts certain foods in their mouth even if it causes them distress?

Thanks

[Lesuffolkandnorfolk]

I should be interviewing Dr Byron at the Latitude Festival so do feel free to PM me any questions and I will do my best to put them to her.

Thanks for an interesting webchat :)

[GretchenWiener]

Arse. I missed it.

I bought if on kindle and ended up bloody loving it. Read in 24 hours. Loved the eating disorder bit and the clinical aspects of that. Really helpful for a situation near me.

Highly recommended.

[doziedoozie]

Very pleased to hear there are more books planned, will look forward to them!

[JugglingFromHereToThere]

Thanks Tanya that was very interesting, and helpful just to ask you my question even though you weren't able to answer it personally

[DrTanyaByron]

Sorry, time is up! Thank you for your comments, sorry I couldn't answer them all. For advice and information, I will later send over a post with a range of links and resources.

Really appreciated the feedback about the book. It will be very helpful as I am now writing the next one!

Best wishes to you all and have a great summer!

[DrTanyaByron]

@1805

Dear Tanya,

Our 9yr old daughter has recently been diagnosed with mild ASD. We have recently had to tell her that daddy is ill with cancer. She has kind of blanked it out as far as I can tell. Do you have any ideas as to how to help her cope when he starts his treatment? She kind of lives in her own little bubble-world, but I just don't know what she might be thinking.

Thank you

Hi 1805,

You've got a lot to deal with, so I send you all best wishes. Your daughter, like any child, will take the information in bits and pieces, and process it as and when she feels able to, often without you being aware. For a child with ASD, narrative i.e. books with pictures and stories can also aid understanding without it being made obvious why the stories are being read to them. A schedule of daddy's treatment on a diary where she can be encouraged to draw pictures and make little treats for him can also engage her in the process in a way that feels meaningful and real for her. I wish you all well.

//www.autism.org.uk

[TheLostWinchesterWife]

One of the problems she has is emotional overeating. She is only 7 I do not want ot give her a complex regarding food and body image but I'm worried for her health too. How do you suggest talking about not eating when you don't need it?

[DrTanyaByron]

@j9dw

Hi, I don't know how to do this webchat thing, do we just come here on Tuesday?
Anyway, I'd like to ask (if you have time) if you recommend DBT for teenagers with Borderline?
My daughter has diagnosed herself, but a psychiatrist, she had a 15 minute appointment (resulting in another cutting episode), decided that she has "a bit of anxiety". That was last August and we've heard nothing since.
My daughter has had to put up with a father with physical disabilities (in constant pain & depressed), an asperger's brother, me being depressed for many years and severe bulyting at school. If you think DBT would help her, how do we go about getting it when our mental health system is leting her down?
She's 19 now and I'm pleased to say, has recently, and very successfully, completed a year at college.

Hi j9dw,

DBT is the evidence-based treatment for borderline personality disorder but I worry that your daughter has not been properly assessed or supported by the professional system. I suggest pushing hard for a second opinion via your GP and also going via the Patient Advice and Liaison Service (PALS) if you feel that you need to raise concerns. There are also good online support resources and online CBT courses that your daughter could look at, however it also sounds like she is a resourceful young woman who is getting on with her life, managing at college which is fantastic.

//www.rcpsych.ac.uk

[lionheart]

Nowt wrong with having your own 'girls'.

[DrTanyaByron]

@GretchenWiener

Oh and I agree the "girls " thing is cringey.

Hi GretchenWiener,

I think you are referring to the fact that in my book, I refer to my friendship group as 'my girls'. I did then, and I still do now! Sorry you find it cringey! But hope it didn't put you off the book. I shall be meeting 'my girls' at our weekly Zumba and kettle bells class tonight!

[DrTanyaByron]

@sunshinechan

My question would be,

Professor, do you have any advice for a potential career changer? I've recently finished an OU Masters in Childhood and Youth and am considering re-training as a psychologist. I'm aware this would entail going back for a 3 year undergraduate degree to get GBC, and then go on to complete a doctorate. I'm 33 and also aware of my ticking biological clock, so that's another consideration. Would I be mad to consider doing this?

If anyone else reading has an opinion please feel free to PM me!

Thank you :)

Hi sunshinechan,

I am not sure how much of your OU degree would count towards a psychology degree but yes, you would need 3 years undergrad psychology degree and relevant work experience to get onto a clinical training course. I lecture on a number of courses and there are many people who have come to clinical psychology later in their career and some who are pregnant! It is a great career and if you're passionate about it, then I really encourage you to go for it and maybe one day, I'll lecture you!

[TheLostWinchesterWife]

I have a daughter who (though sheer determination on my part) has been diagnosed with a genetic deletion which can (and does in her case) involve anxiety, emotional problems and other things like ASD, for which she is currently being assessed. Before we get the diagnosis of ASD, if she actually gets it, should I be treating her traits as you would a child with a diagnosis or treat her as a child without ASD? I do realise that a lot of the care is very similar but I am worried I am damaging my child.

[DrTanyaByron]

@BingoMoss

I loved this book. I am a psychiatry doctor in CAMHS and the writing is so accurate and poignant. I have been trying to work through my rescue fantasies ever since I read that part. The way you write about your relationships with patients is so moving. I couldn't put the book down. I also love how self-deprecating you are.

My question is:

What are the qualities you possess that make you so skilled at what you do?

(and if I'm allowed two)

What are the things that hamper you in your work?

Hello BingoMoss,

Hello to a fellow colleague! I really appreciate when my professional peers can relate to what I have written as it feels like a vote of authenticity, so thank you very much!

I described the murder of my grandmother at the beginning of the book and I know from some posts, that some people found it shocking and brutal which is exactly how I remember it and so how I described it as it still sits with me today. That experience started my journey into mental health, as I tried to understand why the 8 month pregnant heroin-using woman who murdered my grandmother would do such a thing. I then went on and trained over 6 years and 25 years later, here I am still doing clinical work. I do think that I find I can focus in chaos and the book is about helping people (including ourselves as practitioners) navigate the journey from chaos to clarity. Therefore, sitting in situations of conflict and distress and with my clinical training, I do feel focussed and able to facilitate a process of change. Maybe that came from having to cope with my grandmother's murder when my father (her son) was with me and very distressed?

What hampers me in my work is a lack of parity between funding for mental and physical health services. That children and young people, who make up 25% of our population, only receive 6% of our mental health budget. And finally, that a huge stigma still exists around mental illness which means so many come for treatment and support when they are chronic because of a shame they feel about their conditions. That breaks my heart.

[OutsSelf]

I see their intellectual prowess and career success as separate from their sexual orientation in the same way as I do for myself.

I recognise what you are saying. However, you have framed those narratives in this way - you have framed the narrative of power and mutual interest in the context of a sexual relationship here. While you may just be observing in a personal sense an interesting experience you had, as an author your choice is meaningful in terms of readership, and such choices always take place in a political landscape. Welcome to The Humanities ha ha. I expect you have also had experiences of this in the ways that your TV shows edit...

[DrTanyaByron]

@lovinglifewithlittleones

I loved reading the book, I added my blog review onto the linky, I couldn't put it down and wanted more. a brilliant read.
Not sure if i will be able to make the chat tomorrow so I will ask my question now.
Dr Byron, What is your favourite area/setting to work in and why?

Hi lovinglifewithlittleones,

Thank you for your review which I read and really appreciated the fact that you took time and care when discussing the book. At the top of my house I have an office which has a turret roof, so I feel like I am in my own magical kingdom! It is painted white and has shelves of books and computers which means that my kids can also come and do their work up there when I'm working which inevitably means we end up putting on music and dancing!